9 months into breastfeeding, baby not eating or gaining weight and HV has told me

[mololoko]

...to stop feeding him at night as "breastmilk has no vitamins or minerals after 6 months" and should do "cold turkey" and let him cry it out. Then he'd be hungrier in the daytime for food. And I should be giving him vitamin drops.

I know that's largely rubbish but is there any truth in it? DS feeds twice between 7 and 7 and seems really hungry when he does. He breastfeeds 4-5 times during the day.

He isn't keen on food and it's a real struggle to get him to eat anything. If he was gaining weight I wouldn't be worried but he hasn't gained for 2 months and I'm at my wits' end. He's not good with a spoon and the only thing he will eat consistently is bread or toast. He won't take a bottle.

I don't know where to turn for support as I obviously have differing opinions to my HV regarding CC etc. FWIW I'm not bothered about getting him to sleep through yet, I just want to get him eating and growing again.

I am feeling so down because I had a rocky start to breastfeeding and 9 months in I still feel like I'm getting it all wrong.

Have you tried a sippy cup? Have you tried only feedi g him after offering solid food? Have you offered a wide range of things to get him interested?

well of course it still has v&ms - what an ignorant hv! Is she sponsored by Nestle?

Firstly, you are doing an amazing job to be feeding your LO at 9 months

Secondly, AFAIK breast feeding isn't all about nutrition is it? It's about comfort etc for both you and LO - I would be very sad to withdraw that cold turkey what a horrid suggestion.

Have you had the chance to visit a BF group? With a BFN helper or some one similar there?

Have you got any concerns about your child other than what the HV has told you?

He'll take a few sips from a sippy cup. I have tried solid food before breastfeeding, after breastfeeding, when he wakes up, when he's sleepy. I have tried all kinds of fruit, veg, porridge, cereal, yoghurt, fromage frais plus whatever we're eating at every meal (we did BLW with my daughter who LOVES eating). I have even tried the more traditional options of baby rice and purees which he wouldn't eat at all Some days he will eat a fair bit so he can do it, he just doesn't seem interested.

He's not good with a spoon and prefers to feed himself

I thought he was actually getting a reasonable amount of food, but as I say, he hasn't gained weight for 2 months.

He is bright and cheerful and has been crawling since 6 months so I thought maybe he's just very active, but the HV was adamant I need to stop feeding him at night so he gets more solids.

Obviously breastmilk does have vitamins and minerals in it so that is rubbish.

I'd be tempted to drop a feed or two to try to get him on to solids tbh, given that he is 9 months now. Maybe something milky like Ready Brek or baby cereal to begin with. Perhaps with some fruit puree through it.

Or maybe try him with things he can hold himself rather than feeding him from a spoon if he's not keen on that.

Is he mobile? If so he'll be burning more calories which could also be a factor in his slow/no weight gain.

Sorry, x-post. Our only breastfeeding group is run by the HVs and is so busy with people struggling to feed new babies. It's not much use.

The only other concerns I have is that he's not good at going to sleep without suckling, and I've got to go back to work soon.

The HV has really knocked my confidence

The last few days I have been only feeding him first thing, lunchtime to get him to sleep, tea time if he's grouchy and bedtime (plus one or two night feeds). I have dropped the after breakfast feed and waking up from lunchtime nap feed. Having written it down it does look like I'm breastfeeding a lot doesn't it? I'm just scared of dropping feeds when he's not gaining weight.

I have no idea how often I should be breastfeeding at 9 months, I just assumed he'd drop feeds when he was ready.

Just read your second post. If YOU think he is getting enough solids then he probably is.

He's active and burning a lot of calories.

If you're going back to work soon then presumably you'll have to drop some feeds?

Tbh I wouldn't worry - babies shouldn't be weighed very often anyway, I think twice a year once they are past 6 months?

What the hell is she on saying BM has no vitamins and minerals? I would be inclined to report her for that because that is a dangerous level of either ignorance or willful misleading of her clients.

When you go back to work, whoever is looking after him then will find their own ways to settle him, don't worry :)

He sounds a lot like my DS2 actually, who is interested in mainly carbs and not much else and is very keen on his milk - he is EBF also.

Thanks guys. Should I be giving him vitamins?

I don't think that's particularly excessive for nine months OP tbh.

Vitamins after 6 months yes. Particularly vitamin D at this time of year.

Stupid bloody HV spouting absolute rubbish. Your breastmilk is amazing stuff - there was a post on here yesterday about how it changes as children grow older and need more fat to become more fatty. I think it's the thread about Stage 2 Toddler milk, towards the end of the thread.

As most weaning foods (in fact most foods) have fewer calories than breastmilk, then increasing solids is not going to help your child gain weight, unless you start giving things like avocado or banana. Also some growth spurts are to do with brain development so the body puts more energy into the brain and the body doesn't grow as quickly.

There are also other reasons why your child may not have put on weight - faulty scales and HVs writing down information incorrectly is a surprisingly common one.

To be completely honest though, if your child has not gained weight for two months then you should have been referred to a paediatrician asap, not given crappy and incorrect advice by your HV.

Dummies can be your friend for help with settling without booby.

I am no expert but I'm 99% sure that her advice is utter crap, and potentially dangerous crap at that. Of course your milk contains nutrients. She's an idiot. Is there a different HV you can speak to about other options?

Breastmilk is always nutritious no matter what age the child, the HV is giving some pretty stupid advice there and needs retraining.

Only one of my four was a big eater before 11 months, I think it's pretty normal for them to not have a massive appetite for solids before that as most of thier calories should be from milk during the first year.

Would you be worried if you hadn't got him weighed? If he's happy, healthy etc then there is nothing to worry about, he'll eat what he's ready for, some babies just eat more than others. My second ate next to nothing for her first year and my third not much more, I didn't worry because they were getting plenty of milk and they were outgrowing thier clothes. Babies weight swings wildly once they get past 6 months and are more active, they also have growth spurts where they will grow in length so thier weight stalls then, they gain weight in spurts rather than a constant alot of the time. I never weigh mine past a few weeks so wouldn't have a clue about thier weights when they were small, I just kept an eye on how they were in themselves.

Hv said she's not worried about weight as he was up above his line at 6 months and has now dropped to just under it. I hadn't had him weighed since he was 4 months and was just doing it on the bathroom scales. I took him in to check with HV because I didn't think he'd gained and I was hoping I was wrong.

It was when I pointed out that food has fewer calories than breastmilk that she said the stuff about breastmilk lacking vitamins and minerals. Then she stopped talking about food, got all het up about sleep and gave me a leaflet on CC

And here we have a classic case of a badly trained HV freaking out a mother for no good reason at all. Ignore her OP.

mololoko it sounds like your HV spouted rubbish, you called her on it and she got flustered and looked for some territory where she felt safe and in control, in this case, sleep and CC (even though she was spouting rubbish on that too).

You are the best judge of your child's health. If you think he is happy and healthy and developing nicely then don't worry, and certainly don't listen to an ill-informed HV. If you're feeling up to it I would definitely make a formal complaint about her training and level of knowledge. What if she spouts this to a mum who doesn't have the support of Mumsnet or other knowledgeable people and actually believes her?

None of our HVs I've seen seem to support Bf after 6 months. I wouldn't be particularly worried but he doesn't seem to have grown much since I put him in 6-9 month clothes at around 6m.

I am much more worried now I've seen Hv and am starting to get distressed when he won't eat food whereas before I wasn't bothered. I am now concerned about sleep where I wasn't before as well.

It's nice to hear stories of other babies who were slow on the uptake to solids and are fine now, thank you.

I did think about complaining but I didn't even have the energy to stand up to her much (had been waiting in clinic for 2 hours to get weighed). She is supposed to be phoning me in a couple of weeks to see how we're doing. I might grill her a bit more then.

If I hadn't been reading mumsnet for the last 3 years I would be proper worried!

the only sensible thing she said was give vitamins

after 6m brestfed babies are advised to have vitamin drops, and if you are on low income you get them free.

it amazes me how some HVs have jobs!!!

it is within normal range for an older baby to plateau in weight. it would not usually mean paed referral unless there was health or development concern.

OP can you say to your hv that you undetstood her to say that breast milk has no vits or minerals in it at your baby's age? it is so preposterous she may have been misunderstood.

breastmilk needs to be alongside other foods by now and you are working on that! you could ask to speak to a paediatric dietitian who will have some good ideas to tempt your baby. but ut does not sound like this is all an emergency. to reduce bf is a bit of a daft idea and to affect your confidence in this way is sheer poor professional behaviour. btw any of the bf helplines would talk to you about this.

mololoko - that sounds normal. Babies grow so quickly in the first few months that we expect them to keep growing just as quickly. They do slow down a lot and their clothes start lasting longer. It is normal. If you look at the centile lines in your growth chart you will see that they start steepish and then even off.

I am so sorry this HV has knocked your confidence. Would your confidence have been knocked if it has been a street cleaner who told you this misinformation? I only ask because some people have a tendency to believe anything someone in a position of authority tells them, even when that person is spouting absolute bollocks. If you are worried then try phoning the La Leche League for advice and support. They're not just there for the new mums.

HVs aren't generally noted for their great support or knowledge about breastfeeding. I wish I had a pound for everytime I've come across someone who has been given bad and dangerous advice by them.

I wouldnt imagine that breastfeeding is the problem per se, you do need to probably give him iron though, it is recommended that post 6 months if you are b/f you do this.

However good nutrition is vital, breastmilk at 9 months doesnt give enough of this, good does. Are you giving him iron rich food, red meat, spinach etc. I'm not a big fan of vitamins for children but if needs must...

At 12months you can start giving him full fat milk and that generally has so many vitamins that even if he drinks a lot of this he should be ok