A bit of a routine for 9 week old? I can't cope much longer.

6 replies

pantspantspants · 04/12/2011 23:00

DS1 is 9 weeks, very clingy, feeds constantly and doesn't sleep. I have DD1 4years and DD2 2.5 years at home every day, DP works long hours/away/weekends alot and really can't help out . I have no other help from family etc. And I'm exhausted!

DS1 is with me constantly day and night (co-sleeps) in arms or in a sling, which is great but with 2 other preschoolers in the house messing it up, needing feeding and caring for its all getting too much. I would love 2ish hours an evening to tidy/cook/go to the loo/have a shower and just not be carrying a baby. so, Im at a point where if I need to carve out 2 hours in the day to survive.

DS1 is BF on demand and I have good supply able to express extra 3.5oz at a time. So my plan is to start feeding every 2 1/2 hours through the day (currently not going longer than 2 max) and give a bottle of expressed at 7ish and then not feed until 9, try to settle in a crib without feeding etc. Then hopefully after a few nights I may get him to sleep for a few hours so I can do everything before bringing him into bed at 9 or whenever he wakes after that.

Does this sound achievable? I've never kept a baby to a schedule before so don't know what Im doing really. All the advice out there and when I ask friends/family seems to be for bottle fed and 4 hour routines for babies who sleep and are able to be put down. I don't want a baby that spends all its time in a crib only waking for a feed every 4 hours, Im happy for him to set his own pace but want a couple of predictable hours. Is this even possible?

OP posts:

flamegirl77 · 04/12/2011 23:45

It sounds achievable but a lot harder than BFing on demand to me. If you are spacing out feeds more will you need to distract your baby when he is hungry? I would find that tough. I personally would be tempted to work first on getting the baby to accept being put down on a mat or in a bouncy chair now and then. This will at least mean you can go to the loo! Congratulations.

lilham · 05/12/2011 00:06

Are you giving the ebm yourself? I can't see how that would save you work as you would have to clean and sterilise bottles? Also spacing out feeds mean you have to distract. I've seen those routine mums in action. They just keep shoving the dummy in until the next feed time is up. Have you tried a dummy?

Like others have suggested, I'd work on him being happy in a bouncy chair, play gym or crib first. Also most babies are grumpiest in the evening isnt it? Is there a time of day when your DS is in a good mood? Would he be more content on a bouncy chair at that time?

Original poster

pantspantspants · 05/12/2011 08:19

Thanks for the replies.

I can distract him from a feed for a while (as long as I'm holding him) so thought if I had a target amount of time to stretch him to it would make things more predictable in the coming weeks and also get him used to not having a feed at every half hearted hunger sign.

Then the evening time is when he's at his happiest and most relaxed and sleepy. so I thought this would be the best time to tackle the being put down problem. Also when the girls are in bed so I can concentrate on him.

Also with the bottle, when I have given one before he seems to concentrate on drinking it rather than with BF when he falls asleep or sits with boob in mouth making it all take ages. Falling asleep is mostly a problem in the evening.

OP posts:

hazchem · 05/12/2011 12:32

Have you thought about using a sling? I found when mine was quite small I could put him in the sling and he would sleep or be calm and relaxed while I did other things.

MigGril · 05/12/2011 14:20

Sounds like hard work to me. Do you not have a OH who you could hand baby over to for a couple of hours in the evening so you could get a few things done.

It's fine to add a bottle of expressed BM, but spacing feeds could in the long run give supply issues. What will you do when he has a growth spurt?

It will pass and he will seatel down evetualy, they are hard when so little.

mrswishywashy · 05/12/2011 18:44

I think it sounds achievable and something that would help you a lot. You probably could still demand feed during the day but aim for a BF at 4.30/5pm then awake time so that at 7pm when he has EBM he is hungry and also tired. Will the older two be in bed by 7pm because it might be better to aim for his bedtime after the girls as then you have the time to work for him. And also for the start he might only go for 1/2 an hour and then you can work up to two hours or more.

If possible you could always get a swing, some babies are quite happy to spend a couple of hours in that and then you get your hands free.

Flip