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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

Poll for mums who have breast fed a second child (dont necessarily have to have brest fed your first.....)

37 replies

popsycalindisguise · 06/01/2006 16:25

Chatting to HV today about ds2 (10 months) hideous sleep and she said the following (I have already posted this on another thread so apologies...)

she said that she often gets stories of bad sleep from second time breast feeding mums.....very often first time round breast feeders' babies sleep comparably to bottle feeder and what her theory is is that in the night, we are concerned that baby wil wake older child and the easiest way yo calm a crying baby in the night is with the boob. If you are bottle feeding, other stuff is easioer rather than going downstars, faffing with bottles etc etc. So often, second children whi are breastfed get lots of sleep association with the boob as mum offers it immediately in the early days and this persists

This really applies to me.....

Anyone else?
Could this be the reason for my ds2's hideous sleep?

OP posts:
Dinosaur · 06/01/2006 16:27

Not the case with DS2 (despite being breastfed, he did start to sleep from about 11 p.m. until 5 a.m. quite early on, and he was sleeping through the night properly by the time he was about 7 months.

But DS3 - well, yes - could well be. Particularly as I was always too knackered even to get up and sit in a chair to breastfeed him (I tried, but I just fell asleep and then fell off the chair!). So ALL his sleep associations were of lying with me, latched on and sleeping.

hornbag · 06/01/2006 16:30

No, didn't apply to us -it was our firstborn (DD) who was the nightmare sleeper and the second (DS) who was the good sleeper.
Both BF.

lockets · 06/01/2006 16:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

InAHurry · 06/01/2006 16:30

Bloody hell. Sounds like me and dd2!! I'm not so much worried about dd1 waking up as I am about us all getting a decent nights kip/easy life etc. But, it's a cycle I am trying to break. She's not awful at night, but still wakes up after 10pm feed, twice before morning.

Original poster
popsycalindisguise · 06/01/2006 16:46

inahurry - that is us on a good night.....10pm feed then 2 wakings....

I am like dinosaur and her ds3

OP posts:
SoupDragon · 06/01/2006 16:47

No. Both bf DSs slept the same (very well)

LIZS · 06/01/2006 16:49

Both b'fed anbd if anything dd slept longer, earlier than ds had.

expatinscotland · 06/01/2006 16:54

dd2 sleeps in the living room w/me. the door is closed, and it's a fire door. so dd1 does not hear her crying. often, dd2 has to be calmed down before she will latch properly. she gets VERY panicky and often clamps the boob, especially as i'm still new to this and i'm only just now getting it down how speedily i need to aim my nipple at the roof and back of her mouth. if im not fast enough, i let her suck for a few seconds and then break her off and try again.

it's like learning to drive a manual car and taking off in first gear - if you don't get the timing right you stall out.

so she'll start bawling again and i'll have to stick my finger in her mouth for a bit till she calms down and we can try again.

but i don't just offer her boob to keep her from crying. she's a windy baby and often she'll cry a bit after a feed b/c she needs winded more.

it's too early to tell how she'll sleep, tho, b/c she's only 4 weeks tomorrow.

she's still every two hours feeding just now and sometimes every hour.

Tinker · 06/01/2006 16:58

Possibly. But 2nd baby sleeps in our room (nowhere else for her to go) so feed her for our sleep and because I'm more worried about teh neighbours. One shouted "Shut up!" through the walls with my first. On 2 occasions.

mrsflowerpot · 06/01/2006 17:06

This rings true a bit here too, funnily enough I have just realised over the last week or so that I have been doing it with dd. She was a very good sleeper almost since birth (she's 6.5 months), but has been a bit unsettled for a month or six weeks now and I know I am feeding her more quickly just to settle her than I would have done ds at the same stage. So I think I've been perpetuating a bit of a sleep hiccup here.

tamum · 06/01/2006 17:09

Completely the opposite here. Ds was an utterly dreadful sleeper, dd (the second) slept like a dream from very early on. Both fully breastfed. She was in with us for the first few months though, so I wasn't really bothered about her waking ds up, plus he was constantly waking up even at that age (3.5) so a baby here or there would have made little difference.

Sorry you're having such a nightmare.

CarolinaMoon · 06/01/2006 17:12

at your neighbours Tinker!

ds (14mo) is my first and is v much like this, possibly because dp is incredibly intolerant of any noise disturbing his sleep during the night, so I've always tried to quieten ds down asap and the boob is the fastest way. He is still waking twice a night atm.

Gem13 · 06/01/2006 17:12

Both breastfed. DS slept through at 9 weeks, DD not properly sleeping through until 19 months!

She is a livewire though, he's still a sleepy soul.

Piffle · 06/01/2006 17:12

Complete opposite for me
ds was an appalling sleeper and fed almost permanently for 1st 8 weeks
DD on the other hand has been an angel from day dot
I do have a 9 yr age gap though

Kelly1978 · 06/01/2006 17:12

I didn't find it with my second, but it is so true of the dts (no3 and 4). I didn't have to worry abty ds1 wakign dd when he was born, as she was a heavy sleeper. but the dts, I worried abotu them wakign each other, and so frome arly days fed them as soon as they made a whimper. They are 9 months and only jsut sleepign through (mostly!).

Sallystrawberry · 06/01/2006 17:15

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

cupcakes · 06/01/2006 17:18

I've never had a problem with dd's sleep (my second) - she always slept better than ds.

suedonim · 06/01/2006 17:19

Ds1 was mainly f-fed and a good sleeper; ds2, b-fed and not too bad a sleeper though not on the lines of ds1; dd1 b-fed and a reasonable sleeper; dd2 b-fed and a nightmare sleeper!

I've no idea what it all means, though suspect it's more to do with their character etc than how they were fed.

Wordsmith · 06/01/2006 17:21

DS2 is definitely a worse sleeper, but I was not worried about him waking DS1 in the night. Aged 21 months he screams the house down sometimes only 2 metres from DS1 who doesn't miss a snore...

trice · 06/01/2006 17:26

my first still doesn't sleep well and he is 4. second sleeps for england.

ZebraInCA · 06/01/2006 17:30

2nd (breastfed) baby was my very best sleeper (by a big margin). Babies 1 & 3 were the terrible sleepers. I think your HV's theory is hooey....

Original poster
popsycalindisguise · 06/01/2006 17:33

i t5hink zebra may be right....more down to temperement....

I am clutching at straws here though

OP posts:
Nightynight · 06/01/2006 17:40

well I gave breastmilk immediately for all my babies to sleep, and nos 2,3 and 4 were all good sleepers. ds2 was the champion, 6 hours per night from 10 days old!

Passionflower · 06/01/2006 17:55

Nope doesn't apply to us, DD1 was hideous sleeper consequently DD2 & 3 were put into Gina Ford routine from the first week and no probs.

blueshoes · 06/01/2006 20:32

Didn't apply to me - dd (first and only) was an absolute shocker on the sleep front. Did the "oh, don't go to them straight away and let them settle themselves thing". But sleep just got worse and worse until I just took her into my bed. bf for 17 months.

To be honest, I am slightly annoyed at the implications your HV is making - that the boob is not to be used (or abused, shall I say) to calm a crying baby, that babies who are breastfed to sleep will have sleep problems - along the "rod for your back" lines ...