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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

Exclusive Breast Feeding Is Exhausting!

37 replies

PigsWiggle · 25/11/2011 18:55

Hi this my first post and I would be really grateful for any replies!

I have a five month old little girl. I am really lucky that I've never had any problems breast feeding her so I've never been to any breast feeding support groups. I get great social support from my NCT group with all the other aspects of being a new mum but I'm the only one out of our group who is exclusively breast feeding - and this is my problem!

Today in our NCT group it felt like all the other mums were talking about nights out they have had with their husbands, about days out shopping with just their friends, weekends away at spas, going to the gym and their relatives looking after baby so they can catch up on sleep etc. And I'm green with envy!!

Because I'm EBF and my DD refuses to take expressed milk from a bottle I can't be away from her for longer than two hours. I feel like all my other mum friends are having a very different experience to me as they can leave their little ones and get some rest or "me time" if they need to, but for the past 5 months I've had to do every night feed and get up every morning without exception and today the exhausation has just finally caught up with me!!

I feel like it is too late to go to a breast feeding support group now as I imagine it really is for mums with newborn babies rather than 5 month olds. I know there must be lots of other EBF mums in the same boat so I just wondered how you cope and can you give reassurance that it gets easier - when?!

OP posts:

spartafc · 25/11/2011 21:46

Feeding lying down is lovely. It really is. DS refused to take a bottle or a cup until he was about 6-7 months, so I understand the feeling of being tied to your baby. It is knackering, it's draining and repetitive and sometimes very lonely (MN saved my sanity during the night feeds!). But it's also a wonderful thing you are doing for your DD. There are days when you think a lie in would be lovely - which is when the feeding lying down will help, you can roll over and go to sleep while your DH takes DD downstairs to play!

ATruthUniversallyAcknowledged · 26/11/2011 08:02

Another vote for feeding lying down. Give it another go! It's lovely. I particularly like doing it during the day because then you really can 'sleep while the baby sleeps'. We just kind of drift off together. It is soooo nice to wake up cuddling a beautiful gurgling baby! And because it's just me and LO there's loads of room in bed and I don't have to worry about DP rolling over.

G1nger · 27/11/2011 08:24

He's 10 weeks now. He's getting to the point where he's less demanding of my time (quicker feeder; needs to be rocked rather than fed to sleep more) which means I'm starting to get more involved in things again that my partner's taken on. But at my own pace! ;)

birdofthenorth · 27/11/2011 08:34

It gets better. Keep trying the expressed milk in different bottles with different teats. My DD refused bottles for ages but we got there in the end. Maybe try to cuddle/ rock through some night wakes to get out of the habit of feeding all night long.

I waited until 10 months before offering formula milk in a bottle occasionally and when I did DD loved it! I am a big BF advocate but I did wish I had done it sooner, just once a day, so I could occasionally leave the house alone for a few hours at a time. DD enjoyed the taste more than expressed BF and lapped it up. It's an option, that's all. Even if it's once a month.

birdofthenorth · 27/11/2011 08:36

Oh and feeding lying down is brilliant, esp at night. Sooo much less tiring.

And the feeds do get further apart as DC grows. Especially when you begin solids. Promise.

Inlovewithbaby · 28/11/2011 18:33

Sorry a question, what is BLW ? And I am also exhausted EBF an 18 week old who is going through 4 month sleep regression ( I think ) he gets up every 45 to 90 minutes and I am feeling Ill with exhaustion. I love the closeness of breast feeding though.

EauRouge · 28/11/2011 19:11

BLW= baby led weaning. In a nutshell it involves giving your baby bits of finger food instead of purees so they can feed themselves and decide how much they eat. Pros are that there's no spending hours pureeing food only for them to refuse it, you can just give them bits of your dinner. Cons are that a lot goes on the floor but this is easily solved with a cheapo shower curtain under the high chair.

There's a BLW book but the basic info you need is on the website.

The 4 month sleep regression is a bugger! But it doesn't last long. Are you co-sleeping?

Inlovewithbaby · 28/11/2011 19:15

If having a Moses basket right next to my bed is co sleeping then yes. He has been waking up like this for over 3 weeks now. Thanks re BLW I was confused.

paranoid2android · 02/12/2011 10:09

I totally get how you feel OP. I tried to give DD milk from a bottle and when she refused it felt like the end of the world, but actually now I feel quite free, I found expressing, sterilising and attempting to give a bottle more exhausting than BFing! On bad days I try to remind myself that the breastfeeding relationship is really special and unique, and lasts such a short time really, I'd never give it up for all the spa days and shopping trips in the world!

WillSingForCake · 02/12/2011 10:59

When you look back at this time you won't think of the nights-out/freedom that you missed, you'll think how proud you are for giving your little girl the best start! I also suspect a lot of your ff friends may well be a bit jealous of you bf, so the grass isn't always greener!

mrsalwaysawake · 02/12/2011 16:51

G1nger, I have a similarly helpful husband - he is an angel and I couldn't do this without him!

OP, I'm a bit like you in that my NCT group are all happily FF or their babies take bottles of expressed milk, so they all went out last night together. I couldn't go as DS doesn't do bottles. However much i might sometimes envy their ability to have nights out, I've realised that I don't really want time away from my baby boy. And I'm very smug proud of how big and fat he's got from booby alone, and loving that I can eat cake: "i can't diet when I'm breastfeeding, baby needs the calories!"

Chin up, and do go to a BF support group. The one at my local children's centre is lovely, and there are plenty of babies of all ages.

NanBullen · 02/12/2011 19:41

I know exactly how you feel! dd is just 10 months and finally this week decided to take a bottle she also just decided to eat solids as well so i've stopped bf completely which is fantastic, i can't tell you how much better (and freer!) i feel. (although my boobs are killing me )

If i ever had another (not likely!) i would bottle feed from the off, or at least try and mix feed. I've felt like i've had no life these past 9 months!

it won't last forever but blimey it feels like it doesn't it

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