...they find out I'm [shock, horror] STILL breastfeeding my baby - she's only 14 months old for goodness sake! Anyone would think she was 5 the way people look a me and tut or say "You're STILL feeding her"?!! in an incredulous voice. This is from other women, who have (now grown-up) children. She only has one feed first thing in the morning and one feed last thing at night anyway, has done since she was 9 months when she stopped breastfeeding during the day. When invited out by colleagues at work I will mention her bedtime and feed routine as an excuse not to go - It is one of the reasons, but to be honest even if I wasn't still b/f-ing my daughter to sleep I'd not want to miss being with her before she goes to bed on week nights.
I do want to continue breastfeeding until she decides she's had enough. She has very little milk really. It takes less than ten minutes each time. I think it's more of a comfort for her these days, especially if she has a cold or is teething and I don't want to take that way from her. It is a convenient way of getting her to sleep - she doesn't fall asleep on the breast very often any more but settles immediately in her cot afterwards, so it's part of her bedtime routine and it works for us. I also know if helps her immune system as I pass on my antibodies to her when I am fighting off a cold. Apart from all of that, I actually enjoy breastfeeding - It feels nice, I feel a really close special bond with my little one when I'm feeding her, especially when she looks up at me whilst she's feeding and tries to smile with my boob in her mouth (very funny, milk dribbling, but then tends to bite me so I stop laughing quite quickly!!), but the fact that it feels nice is something that I know isn't really mentioned at all by anyone so its definitely not a reason I'd give to a colleague! When she stops wanting to breastfeed at all, I know I'll be quite tearful as it means my little girl is growing up and another stage of her life has been reached already. It may not be far way as some nights she has only suckled for a few minutes before wanting to be put in her cot, but I want her stopping to be her decision, not mine.
I can't really go into all this with colleagues of course and they clearly have absolutely no idea of any of the reasons why I might choose to continue to breastfeed after a year, but a little sensitivity would be nice! I suppose I'm just a bit irritated that I am made to feel there is a need to justify my choice in this to anyone. I don't feel it is a choice really, in that my baby wants to do it (has never wanted a bottle though we did try with expressed milk) and so we have always done it, so why would I stop at this point when it's now second nature to me? Breastfeeding infants after a year ought to be "normal" but I know it isn't, not where we live anyway, it's very, very rare, so I know this is why any mention of it, especially after a year or actually even after only 6 months elicits an incredulous response, but I still find this really annoying!!!
Ah, rant over.... feel better now...