Returning to work mix feeding help!

[runningmonkey]

Please can anyone offer me some advice as to how I can get DS off the boob and onto formula during the day? I go back to work 3 weeks today (yikes!) and really need DS to be off the boob between 8.30-4.30 during the day by then. I am happy to continue bf outside of those times for as long as he still wants to. Never had this problem with DD as 1) I went back to work later and had given up bf by then and 2) she was mix fed from 4mo so well used to bottles and formula.

The mornings are ok (see below) but the afternoons are a nightmare and I am finding it v hard to see what to do when it is so easy just to whip out a boob and feed him and he is so far point blank refusing formula and clawing at me until I feed him!

We are BLW'ing and he is eating ok, seems to eat a little bit more at each meal.

Oh, and he will not tolerate a bottle teat so drinks formula from either a valved bottle/spout thing or a tommy tippee sippy cup.

Lastly, expressing bm is not an option as I can only get 30-60 ml per pumping while feeding and have a toddler to entertain as well!

Here's a typical day milk feeding times are v general as I feed on demand...

5-6.30am wake up bf.
7am breakfast of porridge, fruit, toast, etc.
9am nap usually 40-60min
10.30-11am formula - will drink anything between 30-90ml
12pm lunch
1pm bf then nap for 40min-2hours (if I don't bf it can be as little as 30min)
2.30 bf
4pm bf
5pm dinner
6.45 bf
7pm bed when he goes anything between 2-5hours between feeds at night at random!

So, what do I do? Starting to panic!

I went back to work when dd3 was 7 months and for 1st week went at lunchtime to feed her! Obviously only works if CM near your work. After that I left cartons of milk and juice for her (cup feeding - never took a bottle) but to be honest CM said she struggled to get her to drink much although she ate well. She was happy with the CM but once I or rather my boobs appeared on the scene she'd be wanting a feed. She quickly adapted to no bf between 8am and 4pm and I continued bf until 13 months.

Thanks rufusnine that's really helpful. Unfortunately CM in the village where I live not near work but good to know you continued bf for so long when things changed :)

Hey runningmonkey

Not much advice but I'm interested to hear how you go about this. I'm in a similar boat although I'm self-employed so my work is slightly less pressured, ie I call the shots. That being said I'm pretty set on getting back to work early in the New Year.

How old is your DS? My DS is 7 months and you could have described his day with your routine. Only difference here is he's taking more at the 10:30am feed and I don't give him BF at lunch sleep - which is probably why he rarely sleeps beyond 45 mins at this point, very annoying!

Our nights are very disturbed at the moment too. No pattern at all. He's teething and would happily suck all night if I let him but I need some sleep! I've been trying night after night to get him to take the same soft spout bottle he drinks happily from at 10:30am, for the 10:30pm top up. But no, it's all about the boob at night. I was thinking that's the best one to drop next - then the 2:30pm as I can't imagine the milk supply coping with no feeds during the day and then lots of feeds at night. What do you think? With my DD I got it down to 1st morning feed and bedtime feed, but I can't remember how on earth I achieved this! I fed her till 13 months. MY DS is bigger and hungrier. I'd love to feed him thru winter so he gets the immune benefits but I'm so tired and I'm not confident the milk will stay.

Any BF gurus who can help us 2nd timers with boys get our mixed feeding balance right!?? I don't want it to be all or nothing!

Hi disasterzone my DS is 6mo. Will reply properly tomorrow when not on phone as have had some progress today. Nice to know I'm not alone altho sorry you are struggling too!

You won't be there so she won't have the association. Be prepared though when you get home you won't be able to get your shoes off first

Sorry I didn't make it back - our 2yo DD is being a bit of a nightmare atm in the way only a 2yo can be so haven't had chance to get back on properly!

Anyway, I said we'd had more luck and we have - using a tommy tippee free flow cup DS is drinking much more milk so we have binned off any form of bottle or valved teat! Still not a lot in one go although I guess that is because that is what he wants to drink so we've decided that we'll offer him 100ml formula at a time including with meals and not worry how much he is drinking. Im then feeding him at around 4.30 which is when I would be getting home from work, before bed and through the night which is anything between 1 and 4 times at random! Seems to be working so far so I am feeling a bit happier about leaving him between 7am and 4.30pm. Think I'll just have to worry about the nights later...

Sorry, hit post too soon - how are you doing disasterzone?

Have you tried the breastflow and NUK latex teats/bottles? My DD was a bottle refuser but just over a week at nursery and she's now taking the NUK. These two are the ones bf mums have most success with on this board.

Basically I was going to the nursery and feeding DD twice a day. Shes 8mo and still basically lives on milk. On my off days, i feed her much more than twice during office hours. On her last day last week, they told me she tried to grab a bottle from another baby. So I whipped out my bottle collection and indeed she actually put the teats in her mouth! She only knows how to suck the NUK one. And it's formula I was offering. She downed 70ml every day this weekend. I'm going to send a bottle with her to nursery tomorrow but I'm optimistic she will drink it there.

Hi lilham no I haven't tried those bottles/teats and prob won't now tbh. seeing as he is drinking from a cup I'm thinking that I'll just bypass bottles entirely! Thanks for the suggestion though as it might be useful for others. Hope it works for your DD tomorrow!

We are doing fine too with either a spouted sippy cup or also the Born Free soft spout training cup which is really like a bottle with handles you can take off (like the Avent one). I think he likes this as the spout is good to chew on and it doesn't flow as fast as the sippy cup. I feel we are making progress as he''ll now take up to 6 oz at 10:30 am and about 4-5 oz at 10pm. But he's still waking constantly through the night. I'm not feeding him most of the wakings but it's taking time to resettle him. We also have funny random times when he just really wakes up and won't go back to sleep for nearly 2 hours. Last night the 10pm feed turned into one of those, he did a poo and by the time I'd fed and changed him he was wide awake. I was desperate to go to bed myself but it was 12:45am before I got him off. Grr!

But it sounds pretty good for the transition at least Runningmonkey - what formula are you using by the way? We're on Hipp organic stage 2. I'm using both the powder and the ready made. I think the powder tastes revolting, quite different to the ready made which is strange. It has a weird fishy taste, which I guess is the Omega 3. No wonder they don't really go for it. I'm tempted to change but have a big box of the stuff now. I think you are right about tackling your nights later, you can only do so much at once and he'll make up for your day absence by comforting himself with you at night.

It's hard isn't it, it's surely the most wonderful thing to be able to comfort your child in this way, such a shame it's so tiring and not compatible with our demanding lives!

Have a good night tonight (crosses fingers!).

Runningmonkey - I meant to ask how do you cope with engorgement when not feeding all day, and feeding quite a lot at night? Maybe your (.)(.)s are better at coping with irregular supply than mine! I end up with two rocks if I don't feed by 2:30pm....

Not v well! dropped the morning feed first and for two days was in agony by lunch! After that though I seem to adjust. Am now feeling it by 3-4pm but that's when I'm feeding DS so expect another couple of days and I'll be ok again.

My understanding is (but I am not an expert so don't hold me to it!) that once bf is well established you can do things like drop some feeds without affecting your supply for feeding at other times as long as you do it slowly. With my DD I was eventually only feeding her first thing in the morning for about a month until she dropped that feed and we finished bf totally. I always seemed to have a good letdown at that feed but never got engorged at any other time. I think the same probably works if you wanted to increase the feeds again - ie. it would take a couple of days for your supply to increase but it would. Its amazing supply and demand stuff!

I had similar problems with DS when I went back to work (he was 4 months). He refused any bottles although he'd been mix fed for the first couple of months of his life without any complaints!

After discussing it with the CM I switched to bottle feeding him the feeds he would have with the CM and only offering the bottle. We had a few days of total nightmare (lots of crying from both of us) but after a few days he finally started drinking a reasonable amount of milk. He's 12 months now and drinks fine during the day, still bf morning and evening and the weekends.

I did pump two or three times a day for the first four or five months back at work but I gradually reduced to once a day by nine months and I haven't pumped during the working day for a couple of months now. Advice on here, and my reading of KellyMom, suggested that my supply should adjust. Although there are days when I feel that I can't have any milk but DS seems to get all he needs, even at the weekend.

I hope you both get it sorted!