Nursing strike for 3 weeks??? HELP PLEASE VERY UPSET

[SurelyNotMe]

DD2 is almost 6MO. For the last 3.5 weeks she has been refusing feeds during the day. She was taking milk at night but now that has almost stopped (usually manage a couple of feeds when asleep). Started BLW a week ago, which she loves, and have been trying to top her up with EBM. She will take about 6oz during the day from a cup. Before weaning she would regularly go 6 hours without a feed.

I really really really don't want to stop bfeeding. Apart from the nutritional benefit, I love it. I know that sounds selfish but I have struggled so much to BF both DC and it has become a big part of my life. I fed DD1 until she self weaned at 2. I have terrible connections to expressing (SCBU, tongue tie) and can't face expressing long term (though I will do it if necessary).

DD2 is a very chilled baby but when I try to offer bf she get very annoyed/ frustrated/ arches back/ cries etc. I feel completely rejected. I have tried not offering at all, which resulted in her not feeding from me at all.

I didn't think nursing strikes lasted this long. I also though babies did not self wean until at least 18 months/ 2 years. I'm gutted. I went through so much to breastfeed, I have scarred nipples from tongue tie, and I don't want to stop. But DD2 doesn not want to feed. Do I just have to accept that this is the end?

HELP PLEASE!!!

Bump :(

It is not selfish at all to love BF and after all you've been through I'm not surprised that you want to carry on :)

Has she taken no feeds at all during the day? How many BFs did she normally used to have and how many cup feeds? Just trying to build a picture of her normal feeding routine.

There are a few things you could try to try and get your DD back on the breast. Skin to skin contact can often help, you could snuggle up in bed or on the sofa under a blanket with her laying on your chest, her just in her nappy. You could also try taking a bath together. Removing distractions can help. It does sound frustrating :( she is not rejecting you, she does want to BF- she is frustrated too. Taking some time to relax together might do the trick.

Have you tried feeding in a darkened, quiet room at all during the day? Sometimes babies do not want to miss out on anything that's going on. My DS2 would only feed lying down, which I initially only did at night - but from about 5 months onward he would refuse to do it in any other position, so I just did every feed on the bed, right up until this week, when at 13 months we seem to have mutually stopped!

What does she do before bed? Have you tried being completely chilled about it, stripping off, lying on bed together when she is sleepy?

I hope someone with better advice comes along soon, and good luck.

Not that EauRouge has not given good advice, just that their post was not there a minute ago!

Thanks Eau.

She had no feeds at all during the day for about a week. I thought we had a breakthrough today when she had an afternoon feed (she was v sleepy) but then she refused bedtime feed. She will only bfeed during pitch black darkness (not even a nightlight), so usually about 2 or 3 small feeds overnight until she falls asleep again.

Before this 'strike' was about 7 feeds in 24 hours. Nothing from a cup until I started weaning a week ago.

I've had a bath with her the past 2 nights (and in the middle of the night the night before!). Find it hard to do skin to skin during the day as I have a toddler who is already feeling the stress.

camper yes have tried darkened room during the day but unless it is pitch black/ can't see hand in front of face she is not interested. She is even distracted by the clock in my bedroom, a cushion, anything that isn't me :(

Feeding lying down for that long - that's amazing! How did you manage out and about?. I did try lying down the other night, no luck, she just wanted to go to bed. I've also tried sitting up so that she could look around, but that didn't work either. I've had some success feeding and walking, but she's getting heavy so not sure I can keep that one up!

I'm also confused about expressing. Expressed 11oz today in 2 batches. Doesn't seem like a lot but its almost double what she's taken in a cup. I have put it in porridge/ omlette/ anything else I can. Feel like a booby milk drug pusher!

She's waking up now so will try a feed, please keep posting will check back soon :)

I know you said she's heavy but have you tried feeding in a sling? If you've had success feeding and walking then that could work and you'd have your hands free to play with your toddler. With a decent sling the weight is distributed around your back so they don't seem as heavy.

Why are you doing cup feeds now, is it because of the strike? Does she nap much?

I carry her in a moby stretch wrap but have never managed to feed in it. Not sure how to do it? Think boobs too droopy!. Sounds great if I can manage it, any excuse to put her in the sling!

Yes cup feeds now due to strike, though would have probably introduced cup with water for meals if she was having lots of bm. Just giving ebm in cup at the moment.

Naps are rubbish, in fact sleep in general rubbish. Shes wakes every couple of hours at night (usually for feed at 9pm, then 11pm, feeds after that are difficult/ impossible as she is more awake). She can be awake for 3 hours at about 2am, not upset, just wants to babble/ screech/ roll over/ chew cot etc.

We're all very tired

Sounds like it could be complicated by working on a developmental leap (there's one around 26 weeks) - at least, the night waking sounds characteristic of it. OTOH it's also classic overtired behaviour so that might cause that.

Kellymom has some tips.

It's miserable, isn't it?