Nighttime nightmare

[joanholl]

Hello, my baby is 3 weeks and I am Struggling with night time feeds. They take about 2.5 hours as he is on and off and just won't settle, he falls asleep on the breast but won't be put in his is Moses basket. When he does eventually settle he will only sleep on our chests in bed. He does have quite bad wind, I give him infacol and wind him after each feed but it doesn't seem to calm him.

I have bought a pack of dummies but really don't want to use them, i am also worried about him getting used to sleeping on us. I don't mind how many times in the night I need to get up to feed him but getting up twice for 2.5 hours means that there is little time for me to sleep. It is exhausting makes breast feeding feel like such hard work I am so tired I worry that I am not enjoying this time as much as I should be.

Any idea as to what I am doing wrong?

Hi Joan

You are doing nothing wrong! In fact it sounds like you are doing a great job :) It is totally normal for babies to want close contact with their parents at night. There's no evidence at all that co-sleeping or cuddling a baby to sleep will make them form bad habits, in fact there are some experts that think there are many benefits to close night-time contact with your baby.

There are ways that you can safely co-sleep with your baby if it's something that would make nights easier for you. Here is some information about that.

You have my sympathy! My DD was exactly same for first 6 weeks then blissfully started sleeping through...until recently that is! Shes now 4.5 months old and has forgotten what sleep is! Friday night she woke at 3:20, (didnt go down till midnight!) and didnt go back down! I put her down 3 times and each time she woke up screaming.

I actually feel like Im melting Im that tired! :(

I actually

If he's feeding for 2.5 hours I'd say that he's not latched on right and you really need to go and see your local bf support.

I agree with Bert2e in that its definately worth seeking support from bf experts, but don't be surprised if your ds is latched on right! At 2 weeks my ds was having regular 3 hour feeding sessions and sometimes this extended to 6 hours. At 3 weeks he had a nine hour marathon. His latch was absolutely fine, he was just a hungry boy and I guess that is what it was going to take to up my supply

For us night feeds often lasted well over an hour until around the 8 weeks mark. Now thet are more like 20 mins (although they are still every 2 hours). My ds also falls asleep on the breast but wakes when put in his basket, dummies have really helped with this: if he wakes i offer him the dummy, and stroke his face and 9 times out of ten he goes off to sleep again really quickly.

Sounds like you are doing a great job, good for you for sticking at it!

If it (hopefully!) Makes you feel any better, 6 to 8 weeks is generally the 'magic' mark for most (well, many)' babies...they reach a peak of fussiness at around 6 wks then start to settle better after then. Its apparently something to do with babies starting to produce their own sleep hormones at around 6 wks & they start to differentiate between day & night. I read this in a fab book called 'Healthy sleep habits, happy child', & in the case of my first 2 babies was totally true. my 3rd baby (currently 6 wks)has never really (or just not yet!) Gotten to the fussy stage...perhaps its yet to come, arghhh!

So do hang in there, it will hopefully improve very soon. Have you tried swaddling? Worked a dream for settling all my babies up to around 6 wks.

I had the same with my baby- was feeding for 2 hours and kept falling asleep on the breast or coming off every 5/10 mins. It was her latch that was wrong- I went to a drop-in at a local children's centre and got it sorted. It's still not perfect and there are always new problems, but feeding is much quicker and she's not on and off all the time.

You might also like to try changing the nappy at/during feeding time to wake your baby up a bit more for it.

Hang in there.... Sounds as if you're doing a great job! My DS didn't settle in his moses basket either and my MW gave me 2 bits of fantastic advice which really helped. He still has l-o-n-g nighttime feeds but at least I can now put him down afterwards. 1) swaddle 2) put an old t-shirt that you've been wearing in the bottom of the moses basket so your DC can smell you. Hope this helps. Good luck xxx

I am afraid it all sounds perfectly normal. DD even managed some 4 hour feeds at times, but the good news is that it does get a lot better.

Can you try co-sleeping? It saved me, as I don't think I would have managed otherwise. Also, is it possible for you to relax during the day and sleep when DS sleeps?