3mo feeding problems

[emilyarm]

Sorry - v long post!

I'm having problems feeding my DD 16wks and need help! I have been mainly BFing with a dream feed with formula from 8wks. Since very early on she has preferred one breast which I think has made my supply uneven. Then from a few weeks ago, some feeds have become harder with DD pulling away from the breast, getting frustrated etc. I got the impression she wasn't coming off feeds satisfied. The problem was worse towards the end of the day, however she generally settled and slept well at night.

A HV thought the problem was wind and gripe water does seem to be helping however I also think I now have a supply problem as I now can't feed her enough to put her to bed, so twice this week have caved in after she's emptied bOth breasts and given her formula. Both times she's drunk almost a whole carton, so is clearly hungry.

I think that over the past few weeks she hasn't been feeding properly because of wind and my supply has reduced as a result. I guess this could also be a mixed feeding issue...

So now I'm guessing that I have to work fast if I'm going to maintain some BFing. One thing I thought perhaps is to consistently introduce another FF a day - maybe at 4pm, so that DD is well fed and I have some time to build supply before bedtime - as I'd really like to keep that as a BF.

Another thing to note, DD has had v slow weight gain, so
I'm nervous of her going hungry for any longer.

Helpful and sensitive advice please!

Hmm, I'll wait for others who have expert knowledge to pile in here, but if it were me I'd take to the sofa with DD for a couple of days and feed her as often as you can to try and build up your supply. You need to be stimulating the supply as often as possible to get it back up again. Sod routine. Clearly if you have other children that's not possible.

If you can't do that, the 4pm FF sounds like a good idea, but I would also use the breast pump for a short time as well, just so your boobs don't go for hours without getting stimulated.

I'm sure people with more know how than me will be along soon - good luck

watching with interest as having very similar problems with ds 6 weeks. i think I've figured out that my supply is down a bit in the late afternoon and evening. I've been feeding and then expressing after at around 4 and then giving expressed feed at say 6 or 7 and expressing again to stimulate supply. no idea if it's the correct thing to do but is easier than trying to feed a baby who just sucks for 3 minutes then screams! the other thing i found is when he starts screaming at the breast i pop in a dummy, when he is calm and a bit sleepy i switch to the breast and he feed's calmly. i think he get's frustrated at the slow speed of milk when supply is a bit low compared to the almost ridiculously fast let down and flow the rest of the day. not sure if any of that helps at all?

Sorry you are having this conundrum ;(

Really important to make it crystal clear that the worst thing you can do is to introduce more formula - that 4 pm bottle will not allow you to build supply in time for bedtime...giving formula (any formula at any time) reduces the milk you make.

Breasts don't need extra time 'unused' to make more milk - the opposite is the case.

They make more milk in response to milk being removed. If you don't remove it, you won't make it. It's as simple and as physiological as that.

Many mothers find that a single bottle of formula doesn't make a noticeable difference to milk supply, and they 'get away' with it :)

What might have happened with you is that the 'dream feed' formula was fine in the earlier weeks and months - your baby was feeding often enough, inc through the night, to maintain a good milk supply. If she has started to sleep longer at night, then the gap between bf late at night/early small hours has grown, and this has reduced your supply.

Good news is you can rescue it, by simply bf more often, and using more breasts per feed (three, four even five at times - don't assume you have nothing after two only). Your baby might object some of the time to this, and you will have to go with that rather than making bf a struggle - but some of the time she will be fine with it. You won't need to do this for long.

'Wind' is a weird explanation for what's been happening. 'Wind' rarely stops older babies from actually feeding.

The other aspect is that babies take shorter times to bf as they get older - you may have been trying to get her to feed longer when she did not need or want it. She then cries and struggles not because she is frustrated, but because she wants to do something else :)

Both of these possibilities - already had enough; milk supply reducing - can co-exist :)

Hope this helps.

Thanks all for your replies. Tiktok I'm really glad replied, I'd hoped to hear from you! I think you're right, both of the above have been happening. Now I think of it, sometimes DD has been waking around 9pm and rather than BF we've brought the dream feed forward, especially last week when I was on holiday and indulging in a glass of wine every night. And yes, before that DD was pretty much sleeping through after we upped the amount of formula at the dream feed.

Really hope I can rectify this even if it means a few unsettled nights. Obviously found the idea of stopping BFing very upsetting! One HV told me that DD was simply trying to wean herself off me and onto the bottle!

Tiktok, how long do you think it will take for my supply to adjust?

emily, you have been 'blessed' with some very poorly-informed HVs :(

On the question of how long - a few days, that's all :)

Thought I'd report back on how things went. I carried on BFing a part from the dream feed for another week - feeding more frequently etc. Things did improve, although there was still fussiness at some feeds and the bed time feed was sometimes OK, sometimes not.

However I then went to see the doctor about something else and DD's weight came up in conversation. We weighed her and she'd lost weight, dropped into the bottom centile and we were referred to the pediatrician. Next day we went in for jabs,the nurse saw my notes and gave me a massive lecture, telling me i should start 'complimentary feeding' ie offering a bottle after the breast.

Having had little sleep the night before (worrying about DD), feeding seemded to be particularly hard that afternoon, so i offerred DD a bottle, which she of course guzzled down. That was last Friday and we're now on 5 bottles a day. A part from in the morning, if she's hungry DD is refusing the breast and wanting to get straight onto the bottle.

It's been a difficult and, at times, sad few days and I'm reconciled to the fact that I might not be BFing for much longer. Am going to try to hang on to the morning feed and am offering DD the breast at other times to see if we can keep it going.

Although this isn't where I wanted to end up I think in the end its the right decision. DD had been fussing at the breast for weeks and it was becoming stressful. Had her weight been fine, I might have carried on but i had to acept that she needed more calories and perhaps I wasn't quite willing to do what needed to be done to ensure that happened from BFing

DD seems a happier since she's had a few bottles and more energetic, so whilst I'm sad that I may not be BFing, I think overall we're both happier and less stressed. :)

It's a cautionary tale though and I'd definitely do things differently if I did it all again!

Thanks for the update, emily - sorry you had such a fright :(

Yes, it was supply...I am surprised she had actually lost weight, though, because you said up until then she had been gaining, though slowly. An actual weight loss is a concern and needs addressing (though :( the nurse felt she had to lecture you about it).

You may well be able to continue some breastfeeding for longer than you think - just hang on in there :)