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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

Want to give my growth spurting four week old her first bottle of formula this evening

91 replies

Cressida1979 · 10/11/2011 20:29

My DP thinks I am. She has been practically glued to my boobs since 5am this morning and was the same yesterday and I have nothing left! She's also very irritable and only sleeping in short bursts. I really want her to chug down a bottle and get some decent kip.

DP looked shocked when I suggested a bottle and said he thought we were waiting til she was 'much older' to introduce the odd bottle, and has now gone out to the pub. I may be a little jealous of this, am hankering after a glass of wine but it would obviously be wrong to quaff whilst breastfeeding!! Very tempted to break open the emergency Actimel whilst he's out...

BTW I like breastfeeding and plan to do so until I go back to work when DD is about 6 months, we are talking about the occasional formula feed here!

OP posts:
duckdodgers · 10/11/2011 20:40

Yep actimel is that disgusting yoghurt bacteria thing to drink.

Driftwood999 · 10/11/2011 20:45

I'm no expert and you seem to be successfully bfing and that is truly great. From my own experience I bf our first/dd for only a few days and gave up due to soreness. Everyone was saying, give a bottle. 2nd time round with ds I stuck with it and all was well after the first week. Fast forward to the next months, ds was exclusively bf, I was told that the milk changes as the baby grows, to meet the need, this could be what is happening. Until 6 months he didn't even have water from a bottle and during weaning bfing was still a big part. Finished at 12months when he dropped the evening feed. Of course yanbu to feel as you do, but since you're asking I would go with it, it is tiring atm but it will not always be like that. Try to get as much rest and lovely food that you fancy as you can, (I know that's easier said than done) it's just that if you can get through this stage, life will be so much easier. I wore myself out first time round with cleaning and sterilizing all those bottles. I was really secretly proud of the way my body was able to provide ifyswim.

MoaningMinnieWhingesAgain · 10/11/2011 20:45

Have a small glass of wine, ring a BF helpline for a chat, then decide.

National Breastfeeding Helpline
0300 100 0212
National Childbirth Trust
0300 330 0771
Breastfeeding Network
0300 100 0210
La Leche League
0845 1202918
Association of Breastfeeding Mothers 08444 122949

It's your choice. Every chance baby still won't sleep of course. And you may get quite engorged and uncomfortable. Better to move this to breast and bottle feeding, honestly.

Driftwood999 · 10/11/2011 20:46

And I'm sure I had the odd couple of glasses of wine!

DamnBamboo · 10/11/2011 20:46

I always found la leche league very useful on the two occasion I rang them.

posterofaghoul · 10/11/2011 20:48

I have mix fed from birth due to DD being a bit reluctant on the boob and losing weight at high speed.
I wouldnt have done it by choice though as it's double the fuss and your DP doesn't sound like he is going to do his share.

I suggest a glass of wine and a text to DP to suggest he brings chocolate on his return Grin

LizCojones · 10/11/2011 20:48

And if you do give her a bottle, make sure it's aptamil, not actimel, which would probably make her fart like a carthorse :o

TestAnswers · 10/11/2011 20:49

YANBU - it is entirely up to you what you choose to do!

However, I always found that it took 48+ hrs for my milk supply to start increase in response to extra feeding or pumping. If you want to BF longterm and not use bottles I would advise waiting a bit longer. My DS started having expressed milk at 5 weeks, so knew there was an alternative faster source of milk when the spurts came so refused me at those times and I then had to pump my supply up (hated it!) and top him up with milk from the freezer/fridge. I would avoid that!

MyChildDoesntNeedSleep · 10/11/2011 20:49

If she's cluster feeding, its to boost your milk supply so that she gets what she needs.

So yeah, I think giving a bottle would be unreasonable.

ThoughtCriminal · 10/11/2011 20:50

YABU. Your DH naturally wants your child to have the best start.

Knowing what I know now, and if I were to have my 3 DCs all over again, I would never have put a bottle of that junk near their precious little mouths!

LizCojones · 10/11/2011 20:52

ThoughtCriminal - I am the biggest breastfeeding advocate going, but describing formula as junk is offensive.
Opinions like that don't help anyone, but maybe it gives you a little smug glow knowing you are perfect hmm?

Kayano · 10/11/2011 20:54

Is thought criminal real?! Hmm
Glad I've got this popcorn. Some people need to use formula and some people choose to for a variety of reasons

Original poster
Cressida1979 · 10/11/2011 20:54

I can't believe I confused drinking yoghurt with formula!! The formula has a similar name, it would be bloody unreasonable to give a four week old yoghurt. Sigh, I am rather tired!

Apols, I should indeed have posted in feeding and am off there to have a read. DD has conked out on my knee and i'm hoping that if she sleeps for an hour or so I should be able to build up some reserves and avoid the bottle! I note the comments that she may well not drink well from a bottle at first anyway so it's probably not a good idea to attempt her first bottle when I'm knackered and stressed! Have gone with chocolate rather than wine for now, but not ruling it out for later on.

DP is generally great and his evening out has been planned for a while. I will get lots of favours in return.

OP posts:
LizCojones · 10/11/2011 20:57

The more she feeds, the more milk you produce. I'm not sure it's a case of building reserves.
Sounds like you're doing brilliantly :)

FabbyChic · 10/11/2011 20:58

If she needs a feed then feed her seriously, the baby comes first not what your partner or you think is best. However, I wouldn't mix her feeds, it may be you are not producing enough for her to get by on.

You might find that FF is better for her in the long run.

Original poster
Cressida1979 · 10/11/2011 20:59

Thanks so much for the supportive messages and info about breastfeeding support, really helpful. I think I just need to educate myself more on how feeding patterns can change.

OP posts:
WoTmania · 10/11/2011 21:03

It's often aroundt his time that people start ot doubt their milk supply. Cluster feeding is a way of sending your body messages to up your milk supply.
Also no such thing as a truly empty breast, you're constantly producing milk so the 'filling up' thing isn't accurate. If she needs a feed then feed her, you will be producing enough milk if she's pooing, weeing and growing.

LizCojones · 10/11/2011 21:05

After reading Fabby's post, please, please don't think your baby is doing this because she is starving - honestly, she's not!
It's so sad the number of people who give up bfing because they think they don't have enough milk.
All your baby is doing is stimulating milk production. Your boobs will not empty, they carry on producing even though they feel empty.
If you are confused about it all, have a browse on Kellymom website - I would link but I'm on my phone and it would take bloody hours!
Seriously, it really does sound like you're doing well, and your baby is doing everything you would expect a 4 week old baby to be doing :)

LizCojones · 10/11/2011 21:06

Ignore my post, WoTmania said it so much better :o

JAMW · 10/11/2011 21:06

It's far too early to be mixed feeding. Be careful, I tried introducing a bottle to help DS sleep through. It worked but my supply dwindled and it was hard work getting it back!
DS cluster fed all the time for at least 10 weeks. It takes determination and if you're giving in to the bottle now, you won't be able to hack it!

Only way I get through growth spurts is for DP to take him for a walk in the pram etc think smelling your milk makes them worse!

Iggly · 10/11/2011 21:12

It's very rare Fabby for someone to actually not be producing enough. It is however very common for mums to think they're not. I remember squeezing my nips after a marathon day of feeding (at around 4 weeks probably) as was utterly convinced there was nothing there. The feeding frenzy will pass - it's just baby's way of upping production.
If your FF baby downed a bottle, you wouldn't think the milk was inadequate. You'd feed them more. Same with BF - just takes a bit longer than the time to make a bottle Wink but once your supply is stable it becomes a lot easier and more efficient.

NinkyNonker · 10/11/2011 21:12

Militants Hmm.

Tbh I would feed through it, after a few days your supply will be up and things should even out. But no-one will send the nork police round if you use a bottle.

coraltoes · 10/11/2011 21:13

My baby was fed "junk" as thoughtcriminal so eloquently puts it. I'm now weaning her onto space dust. It's a slippery slope.

SlinkingOutsideInSocks · 10/11/2011 21:14

if you're genuinely keen to breastfeed, then I would be wary of mixed-feeding- she's doing what she needs to do to up your supply.

However, this is clearly not the main issue on your thread. Your DH who tells you what to do and then fucks off to the pub is the issue here, and that we can't help you with, I'm afraid.

Moulesfrites · 10/11/2011 21:15

You don't have "nothing left". Her cluster feeding is telling your body to produce exactly the right amount for her. For every oz of formula you give, that is telling your body to produce an oz less of milk.

Give the bottle if you really feel you need the break, but be aware that it could affect your supply. Agree your dh is being unhelpful. You need support in these early weeks. And a glass of wine will do no harm!

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