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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

Did you go to a BF support group and, if so, what did you get out of it?

17 replies

NotAnotherNewNappy · 08/11/2011 10:08

I have been suffering PND and one of the actions my GP was insistent I took to help myself get better was to attend a BF support group. It's one of those things I always meant to do with my 3yo and 7mo DDs but just never got round to. I think I thought the focus of it would be about how to BF - i.e. lots of talk about cracked nipples and lectures about how to get the right latch.

However, I finally made it last week and was very pleasently surprised. It was just a baby group really where everybody happened to BF. So, did you go to a BF support group and, if so, what did you get out of it?

OP posts:

PeggyCarter · 08/11/2011 10:17

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LittleWaveyLines · 08/11/2011 10:25

I went to one when pregnant on maternity leave, then for a few weeks after DD was born. The BFC helped some with latch problems, but mainly the other mums were good to chat to about various worries I had. Keep meaning to go back for a catch up....

Kveta · 08/11/2011 10:25

yes, still go to LLL when I can, although not as often as I'd like to. I liked being able to feed DS without any judgement (used to go to baby groups where not everyone bfed, which didn't phase me, but the minute I started feeding DS, a few of the non-bfing mums would start talking loudly about why they didn't/couldn't bf, which was a shame), and with people who understood why you don't necessarily want to stop bfing just because of a few bad nights of it! Apart from that, it's nice just to have a gossip sometimes and meet other mums!

EauRouge · 08/11/2011 11:34

I go to LLL groups too, they are really relaxed and informal. There's a topic for each meeting but you often end up talking about anything to do with BF. It's not really a trouble-shooting thing where a BF counsellor just answers questions, it's group support so you get lots of different viewpoints and choose whatever sounds best to you.

I've made some really good friends who make excellent cake through LLL.

mawbroon · 08/11/2011 11:57

I have been going to LLL for almost 6yo now on and off, depending on if it fits with school/nursery times! I found it very helpful when ds1 was around age 2 and chatting to others who were feeding much older children.

Now I am the one at the meeting who is by far feeding the oldest child (not that it's a competition of course!!) and I like to think (hope!) that some of the other mums might benefit from my experience and great wisdom

On the other hand, I went a couple of times to an NHS run group, more to offer support as a peer supporter than for support for myself IYSWIM, and I was dismayed to find the woman running it (not sure what her role was, I think perhaps nursery nurse, but not 100%) was giving out pretty bum advice despite having access to LLL's Book of Breastfeeding Answers. Worse still was the look of total trust in the first time mums' face who seemed to be taking her word as gospel.

So, really, I guess some BF support groups are great and others are pants.

peedieworky · 08/11/2011 12:06

Like mawbroon, I went to one as my first outing with DS after ECS. Noone really welcomed me, despite my attempts to join in and introduce myself. Everyone seemed to be in little cliques and I felt pretty lonely so never went back. That said, two girls I know started going a few weeks later and there were loads of new faces so it was just bad luck on my part I think.

I had a BF peer support "buddy" who I can honestly say is the only thing that kept me going through the 6 days till my milk came in..and many difficult times since!

SkinnyGirlBethany · 08/11/2011 12:07

I went to a surestart one and made my baby friends- there are 6 of us who meet regularly and were v good friends now. Our dc's are 2.5 but we all gave up at 1 yr and still have lots to talk about

HeresTheThingBooyhoo · 08/11/2011 12:13

i went to a surestart one. i got frustration out of it. i was lucky that i had no problems BFing but some of the other mums did and they were given shitty advice. all of the mum's i met apart from 1 were first time mums and understandably worried about getting it right and their baby being healthy. the advice given out by the midwives in particular really upset me. one recommended expressing into a bottle and putting baby rice in for a 5 week old baby to get her to sleep at night. the ignorance amongst those midwives was a disgrace. the HV was fab though, she was totally up to date on how BFing works and her advice was spot on. unfortunately we only got to see her about once every 6 weeks as they were on a rota. the rest of the time it was a midwife and rarely the same one. so lot sof contradicting advice being given to lots of confused new mums. and many of them didn't stay around long enough to get the good advice from the HV. most left around the 6/7/8 week mark.

Woodlands · 08/11/2011 12:36

I did, it was an absolute lifeline. I first went when DS was 5 days old and carried on till he was about 4 months. It was run by our local infant feeding coordinator and she was so calming and full of amazing advice. I stopped going because the day and time changed and because it was really tailored to mums of newborns (though my friend still goes with her 17 month old!). I went to LLL for a while but haven't been since I went back to work as the meetings have been on one of my work days. However it has now changed day and is being held tomorrow and I think I'm going to go along. Feels a bit odd to go to a BFing group with my 16 month old but I guess I am now definitely an extended BFer so it will be nice to see others.

JAMW · 08/11/2011 13:36

I got to a surestart babycafe. I love it! Have to say more for the social side than for breastfeeding support, although the council breastfeeding support worker and midwives are there. It is a bit cliquey, but I do like talking to other bf mums!

poppygolucky · 08/11/2011 22:07

Go to a sure start bf cafe too, run by a BF counsellor and a play worker. Two if the nicest, most helpful and supportive women you could ever meet.

Also, lovely bunch of mums from all different walks of life. Advice I've received has been spot on; both ladies really know their stuff.

Original poster

NotAnotherNewNappy · 08/11/2011 22:15

Thanks everyone. I didn't realise how anxious I was about feeding in public until I started CBT. It was amazing how much more relaxed I felt at the BF group (another SureStart Baby Cafe) than at my usual playgroup. Usually I am in the minority BF and, like Kveta find that other mum's like to talk to me about their reasons for not BF... Which is fine but not necessarily what I need to hear when I am knackered but sticking with it because I really feel it is the right thing to do for me and DD. I will be going back tomorrow morning and I can't believe I am actually looking forward to it

OP posts:

WoTmania · 08/11/2011 22:39

I went to my local PS/MW led group adn then LLL. I still go to LLL. Mainly for the social side and to meet likeminded mothers. In the early days in particulas it was nice to ahve a safe space ot complain in about broken nights/tiredness etc as most people would just say 'put them on a bottle' 'you're making it harder for yourself'.

dogindisguise · 09/11/2011 17:07

I still go to one sometimes (DS is nearly 1). It's a nice friendly group, more like a social group for mothers really, though they often have a breastfeeding counsellor around for women who are having trouble.

Ponyclubmum · 09/11/2011 17:28

I had a lot of trouble breastfeeding at first, and had no transport to get to our local SureStart baby cafe (would have been a 2 bus and long walk job). I spoke to a LLL lady on the phone who was fantastic, really helped me through the first few weeks. I got a car soon after, but didn't bother going to the baby cafe as we were well in the swing of things by then. When DS was a year old I decided to visit the drop-in baby cafe to see about volunteering so I could help other Mums needing the support I had needed. There were no other Mums there, just 2 volunteers who were really rude, unwelcoming and looked totally bored. Their 'boss' (no idea whether she was a HV, midwife, counsellor etc?) arrived and they perked up. I filled in a form, and was told I'd get a letter notifying me when the training would take place. I left feeling rather deflated, and glad I hadn't gone there in desperate need of support. I wasn't even surprised when I never heard anything from them re: the training. It was very disappointing.
We're ttc baby number 2 atm, and I will look around for other breastfeeding support groups to join this time, whether I need it or not - it's always good to share experiences.

WoTmania · 10/11/2011 09:42

ponlyclubmum - the thing I like about LLL is it isn't just a problem solving drop in it's a support network and often mothers make friends and the relationship evolves outside of meetings.

Ponyclubmum · 10/11/2011 09:49

Yeah, the LLL lady I spoke to was so helpful, I'll definitely look out for a group when we (hopefully) have number 2. Whether I struggle with breastfeeding again or not, it'll be great to chat with other bfing mums.

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