convince me to perservere

[bonkerz]

Please tell me im being over emotional and irrational.

DD was born on 19th December weighing 7lb 4 oz. She didnt feed too good for the first 36 hours then was great at breast feeding for a few days. She has a cold at minute and we have drops for her nose but she has lost 10 oz in 9 days and i feel like im failing her!
So i suppose the question is do i put her on formula in hope she gains weight? I am expressing and she is taking 2 EBM bottles a day plus boob. So should i perservere with breast even though its making me feel bad ( love feeding her but cant stop worrying) or do i go with formula and learn to live with the failure?

Bonkerz - just read things fully My DS lost about 12oz at first and then regained. at 2.5 wks he had regained the 12oz. I think it's perfectly normal.

I agree - if there's loads of poo coming out then there's loads of food going in! But don't panic if that changes - my DS only goes once a week and has done since 6 wks old.

The ladies on here are experts at expressing if it's something you're thinking about doing when you go back to work.

Am due to start back as a childminder at the end of feb and DD will need to be on formula diring day atleast by then as i care for 3 children and not sure i can fit BF in as well!

So how old will your ds be by then? And what hours and days will you be working? Will your charges have a nap during the day?

Bonkerz, it sounds like bf-ing is going great for you and dd. None of the initial problems with latch on nor fears about insufficient milk - you don't need any more proof that many wet/poo-ey nappies that you've got the goods! If weight-loss is the only issue, I second everything the ladies here have advised. Apart from initial normal weightloss, illness is a huge factor in itself. But the little ones do drastically pick up steam once they are over their bugs. Also, formula does not equate to weight gain. My dd was fed formula via a naso-gastric tube in the first 2 weeks of her life and she poo-ed and wee-ed for England. But she hardly gained any weight, certainly no more than if I had bf-ed her exclusively.

From a sheer convenience factor, I would say stick with bf-ing. You transmit so much more than nutrition in doing that.

As for bf-ing and childminding, it looks like your dd is an efficient feeder (10 min). Unless you have someone else who can give her the bottles of EBM, I would think bf-ing is way easier than bottle-feeding, without all the faff of washing, sterilising, boiling water, measuring out amounts. Some mums have also been able to bf using a sling.

Persevere. The cold will be making it difficult for her to feed whether it be from breast or bottle.

How's it going today bonkerz? I think the early days of bf ing can be overwhelming with the responsibility and worry of it all. If you are worried about weight gain I would offer the breast as often as you can bear it. Lots of cuddles and skin to skin help to encourage a lazy or sleepy feeder - but tbh it sounds as though you are both doing fine and just need a boost in confidence

Bonkerz, I would just repeat the comments here. I don't agree with your midwife's suggestion to express and give in a bottle -
just feed. Babies with colds can usually manage perfectly well, though they may stop and start a bit more. She needs to feed ad lib - skin to skin care and lots of chances to feed more often than she would 'ask' for if she was alone in a crib.

The weight gain info is impossible to judge. You need more than the birthweight and one extra reading to be sure which way the wight is going. In the absence of that info, you can look at other signs: several soft yellow poos a day, alertness and keeness to feed, responsiveness to the breast, no soreness for you.

Good luck

Bonkerz - of course you are being emotional and paranoid! You have a two week old baby - its compulsory. . i am mad as a hatter and my baby is a week older than yours. i feel like I am feeding him 24 hours a day and its knackering. But he is gaining weight coz he doesnt have a cold. Yet . But he will probably get one soon from his big brother or sister. And then he'll probably stop gaining for a while. Its just what they do. Honestly. Babies just do it to drive us mums crazy. And some HV dont help .

Hang on in there. Listen to the words of wisdom from all teh MNers. You are not a failure, you are doing a great job. This is by far the hardest bit. In a few weeks Bf will be a doddle, so much easier than bottles. When you start to child mind again you will be so glad you didnt giveup. A quick 15 mins up your jumper and baby will be happy!!!!

sorry forgot to say that DS1 ( now 19 months) was a big baby at birth and lost 7% of weight. Midwives had me DISTRAUGHT with worry and put us under MAJOR pressure to bottle feed formula. Honestly I thouhgt they woudl report me to social services for child abuse because i was BF ( talk about paranoid!!). So I know how stressful it can be!!!!

bonkerz, my dd was the same birthwt as yours and at 2 weeks she was still 7.5% under birthweight - also very jaundiced. with the advice here on mn (and contrary to hv wanting me to topup with formula) she regained 10 oz in her third week and 12 in her fourth! Stick with it. you and your lo can do it.

Hi bonkerz,

I'm a registered childminder as well and I'm still breastfeeding my 9 month old despite one little girl (aged 2) being with me for 55 hours a week. I also have 2 children of my own (5 and 7). I've always thought the opposite to you though - that breastfeeding leaves me with more time to spend with my mindees, not less. With breastfeeding I have one hand free for cuddling one mindee while feeding the baby. This means I can read a book, or cuddle up and watch the tweenies etc. Some people have a special box of toys which only come out when feeding to make it a special time for the older ones. And obviously, there's no washing, sterilising or making up of bottles.

From around 4 months DS3 became really efficient at feeding and only feeds for around 10 minutes every 2 hours. I find that during most of the feeds the mindees are busy anyway and don't seem to take any notice of me feeding. Its nice to have that small bit of time for DS3.

Good luck, Mandy

stardoman, can you check your email?
aka alux.