What am I doing wrong??

[FeastofBeans]

My DD is only 12 days old but we are really struggling. No matter what I do I can't seem to get her to open her mouth enough so she just sucks on the nipple, which is agonising for me. If I try to reattach her it makes no difference other than making her cross and angry. We both end up in tears and the whole feeding process is a nightmare, I dread every feed with the pain and upset.

I had some help in hospital and it seemed to go ok, didn't hurt, and she was fine (after a rocky start waiting for milk to come in) All my
MW visits the BFing was fine so I didn't ask for any help but now I think I don't get any more MW visits so it's too late to get help.

Now it seems either my nipples are worn out or my DD has got lazy, or I'm doing it all wrong :( There's no blood/scabbing/cracking but my nipple ends look a bit 'raw' and hurt constantly. Everything I've read says that if I'm doing it right it shouldn't hurt at all.

My DD is small with a small mouth, should I just bear it for now? Are we in bad habits? I'm using lanisoh but it doesn't help. I'm also using the TT cooling pads. One MW said nipple shields were a good idea, one said they weren't. I've ordered some but I'm so confused.

Can anyone help me with how I make this whole experience better for both of us? We'd both be so grateful.

Feast, i think you're amazing! A huge well done to you! Such a tough time when you have a tiny baby and it takes us all back to when we were sitting there trying so hard and longing for answers.
Three cheers for Feast!! Hip hip hooray! X

Just read this, glad you got things sorted.

I couldn't feed mine across the body either - it was the rugby ball hold for me too! Also a lot easier to wander about while feeding.

OP it's worth considering having the TT checked to make sure it's not regrown at all. I would also second going to see a cranial osteopath. Often TT can be associated with tension which the CO can release, allowing her more freedom to flex, and therefore latch.