DS2 has given up!

[Demented]

Just had to tell someone! My DS2, 16.5 months has give up b/feeding of his own accord, I must admit that previously I didn't truely believe anyone who said their child had done this (sorry ), but now I am a believer!

DS2 has almost seemed irritated at feeding time (down to one feed before bed) over the last few weeks, getting up on his feet whilst feeding etc then on Monday night I was out for a short while and asked DH to have DS2 ready for bed and I would feed him when I got in, when I got in the house was very quiet and DS2 was in bed asleep, I took this as his cue and he hasn't asked for (or been offered) a feed since.

I can truely say that this time round (DS1 was a different story) my experience of b/feeding has been very satisfying, enjoyable and guilt free (apart from a small amount round weaning time. we didn't make it to six months).

I would encourage everyone who possibly can to give b/feeding a go even if you have had a bad experience first time round as it can work, myself and DS2 being an example.

Great story - thanks Demented... DD stopped at 19 months and I could not get her to start again
It was HER decision

My Dd is 9mth old and refused to nurse today. She nursed four times yesterday. It just happened one day to the next. Everytime I offered her to nurse her, she just turned away. She wouldn't a bottle nor a beaker. I had to pour into her food. Could this be it? I am not ready to give up. What could be the other reasons?

1. She is teething.
2. yesterday, I loudly said to her "no biting" as she nipped my nipple. She became startled and whimpered a bit.
3. I gave her less solids as to increase her milk intake but that didn't work.

What can I do to avoid self-weaning at such an early age.

It could also be an ear infection (hence not wanting to suck on anything including bottles). Or mouth ulcers (hand foot and mouth disease). Or it might just be she's ready. I think children really vary in this respect and let you know when they're ready. My ds who is not a "sucky" baby (threw his dummy away at 3 mo.) bf until I had to stop him at 15 mo. because I was pregnant with dd and it hurt too much. Dd who is a "sucky" baby (is permanently attached to her bottle-if I let her) stopped bfing herself (just refused me one day) at 11 mo....I was so disappointed, but she seemed to be happier.

Nanette - I don't think she is weaning herself.... it's more likley to be a nursing strike. Have you done some skin to skin ? Have you tried feeding her when more sleepy/drowsy ? Have you tried another nursing position? Usually with patience babies return to the breast wthin 2 to 4 days.
You do need to express your milk though. Give her the milk in a cup.

I am in a rush now but I'll post later.

Nanette - startling my dd with a yell when she bit me stopped her feeding at 15 months, so she may well have got a fright. Definately cuddle skin to skin and offer the breast frequently but do not force the issue. I think at 9 months she will resume feeding.

Thanks for the advice. I am still hopeful and read up on nursing strikes. I hope this is what it is. This morning she resumed the regular nursing position and realized what she was doing and she pulled back in full rage. She even swatted my breast. It is a sad feeling the comes over me. I just think that 9 mth is too early after I have had successfully b/f my very sucky dd.
I have encouraged lots of skin to skin contact by walking around the house w/o a shirt on. I have been holding her, and speaking to her in a calm voice in hopes that she will resume nursing.

Nanette, my ds self-weaned at 9 months. I wasn't ready & felt sad, rejected, tearful etc. it was all so sudden. One day he would feed, the next not. He also refused bottle/cup/beaker & I had a very stressful month where he rejected all forms of drinking vessel & all drinks. Then after a month he started to take a cup.

With ds2 I was determined to avoid bottle refusal, so, following good old GF advice, I gave one bottle of formula a day from a couple of weeks, but essentially fully b/f him too. Anyway, at almost exactly the same toime, to the day, ds2 self weaneed also at 9 months. I suppose I was very surprised it had happened at the same time, but at the same time a bit prepared. I think it's weird they both stopped at 9 months, but they did.

I hope it is just a hiccup with your dd, as it was tough to stop so suddenly (both mentally and physicaly), so it's good you're persevering. But while breaast is best & all that (and I did feel v. strongly about this & planned to feed till at least 1 year), i guess I had no choice in the end to accept my sons' decisions, and hope that this stage, whatever happens, passes smoothly for the both of you.

Nanette - a place to try feeding is in the bath together. Might work. I remember trying for a fortnight to get dd to feed again - she did it in the bath but then wouldn't do it again. You are doing the right thing by remaining calm and cuddling her in. Give her the opportunity to feed and hopefully she will.

I can really sympathise, nanette and monkey. My ds self-weaned at 8 months. Just one day stopped cold turkey. I kept offering and expressing on the off chance - he refused cups, water, bottles everything. He was eating well, so at least he was getting fluids there, but by the end of the second day we were panicking and trying syringes and all sorts just to get a bit of water or anything down!

Eventually he did take a bottle of formula (this was after a very stressful week) and I felt so upset and guilty that he'd stopped early. Really quite devastating because it was not my choice to stop then. Silly really, because it was a real achievement that we'd got to 8 months.

Looking back on it, he'd been playing up for at least the month before, not really interested in feeding. He loved solids more and was never really a "milky" baby after being weaned. Plus the world was getting interesting for him, and he begrudged the time facing mummy, I think!

This is not to say that in your case, nanette, that it's not a nursing strike rather than self-weaning, but after monkey's post I really wanted to post to say "been there" and to remind you both that you've done an incredible job breastfeeding for 9 months - so many don't make it this far. I hope that your dd gets back to nursing real soon, nanette.

Well on Sunday evening, the nursing strike ended. With the clocks changing, I delayed feeding her by and hour to keep her on the GF schedule. She was hungry before her scheduled feeding time and reached out for my breast. I gently positioned my breast near her mouth and she gently moved her head to it.
I will never know what it was that made her go on strike. Was it the remprimand for biting, teething, ear infection or an indication of self-weaning?
If she would have self-weaned I am glad to know that other women have had the same feelings I was having this weekend.
Thanks for your support

That's excellent news! Will keep my fingers crossed for many months more (well, as many as your hoping for, lol) of breastfeeding to come! Well done!

nanette, glad your DD has started feeding again!

Does he want to b/feed again?????? Tonight my DS2 was giving me all the "I want a feed signals", pulling at my top, looking down my top, even trying to latch on through my top and bra. It has been about a month since he last had a feed, and also since he last asked. Could he be for real, terrified to offer a feed in case he bites, or it just confuses him further as I wouldn't imagine he will get much in the way of milk or even get it very quickly. He is in bed now, as usual with no feed (or usual for the last months) and still crying, don't know what to do!!!!! I don't think I want to restart, I've got kind of used to it now.

Panic off, he seems to be going to sleep. Wonder what he was up to though? Wonder if he just remembers b/feeding?