Let's play extended bf bingo with This Morning

[CountBapula]

"That's more about the mother than the child."
"Oh my goodness, that's repulsive."
"Anything past a year and a half is just too much."
"Well, they do it in other countries, but it's not really acceptable here, is it?"
"Breastfeeding's all well and good, but that child's, what, 18? " (the child in question is nearly four)

really TSC? At only 12 months? Mind you, a lot of HCPs are woefully uninformed about this stuff.

DS is 10 months and am just starting to get the odd sort of look, but no comments.

Oh, I'm so glad I missed this!

I will admit to having previously been completely ignorant and influenced by friends, family and media about 'extended' bf. Admit that I may have once said to a non-mum friend 'I suppose if they can ask for it they shouldn't have it' and 'I suppose once the baby's around 12-18 months, there's no further nutritional benefit to the milk and its really only about the mother'. .

Then I had DS - and ohmigod, I can't see myself stopping until he is ready (he's only 6months). I totally agree with comments above - human milk for a human child, 'quick, lock 'em up, they must be insane! quick, get the cow's uddermilk instead, much less repulsive'.

I love breastfeeding so much i can't describe. I know my lovely healthy and, erm, chubby, baby has benefited from the perfect food, designed just for him.

What it comes down to i'm finding is that an awful lot of people object to bf, full stop. Others don't mind too much so long as its in private, or discreet, or or limited to a finite, arbitrary, time period. Others might only agree with breastmilk past, say, 6 months if it is in a bottle past. Add to all those isshooos is the (little britain be damned) 'bitty factor' of a 6m old+ sucking on the breast and boom: you have licence for a daytime TV programe to basically perpetuate ignorance and downright pathetic opinions.

My dad has already started to challenge me about breastfeeding my son. He said that as he's a big boy I might want to stop soon. I've had my mum nod in agreement - she stopped BFing my brother at 11months only at the insistence of my dad 'by then it really was only for me - I knew he was my last baby'. I think that all influenced my opinions about extended BF. And i had THOUGHT that I came from a BF friendly background!!!! Imagine if my mum had FF? I may not have even got to 6 months, let alone completely turnaround my views on the subject.

Poppy, I think that's quite normal. I know before I was pregnant I was completely ignorant about bf - I'm sure I "knew" you stopped at 6 months. I had seen colourful SMA cartons in the shops and somehow linked them with instant mashed potato in my mind

Hi Stealth - I know exactly what you mean!

Part of the problem is language use even with NHS and certainly on the marketing fluff of formula companies, thus:

'The Department of Health recommends exclusive breastfeeding for the first six months of life'.

It suggests that 6 month is the time to STOP!

If it were phrased in the following way 'The Department of Health recommends that babies should receive breastmilk as their exclusive source of nutrition for the first six months of life, then as their drink for at least a further six months. Breastmilk continues to have nutritional and health benefits for mother and baby for long after the baby's first birthday and should continue so long as mother and baby are happy' perhaps the message would penetrate the public consciousness.

Poppy I know what you mean. I was bf until I was 2, but had never met anyone other than my mum who'd done it past 12 months. The first extended bfer I met is actually a MNer.

I also didn't know or care much about bf until I did it myself. Now I intend to keep feeding DS until he's at least 12 months and probably longer.

I still never would have branded it 'repulsive' or 'disgusting' though, especially if I were in a position to influence lots of people - if I were a presenter of a popular daytime TV programme for instance

I was in hospital giving birth to DD (that;s my first casual use of "DD" right there) and when the midwife asked if i had bf DS and for how long she was stunned when I said until he was 2. She had never met anyone who had bf to 2 before. Surely that a midwife has never come across a mother who has nursed in line with WHO recommendations before is the stunning part.

ooh have you just had a dd?

Have to admit, all the HCPs I have come across have been really supportive - HV dashing over and offering me water when I fed DS at about 10 months, GP telling me "no need to stop breastfeeding, best thing for him" when I was concerned it was exacerbating DS's ear infections at about 18m, MW seeing my heavily pg and dizzy and telling me off because I was dehydrayed, especially as I was still bf, drink more water. As it should be!

I have to admit to also having previously not understood extended BF and felt it was a little 'odd' maybe. I did try to BF my first 3 DC but wasn't very successful at it really. I can still remember though constantly asking one friend when she was going to stop after her DD was 6 months old (she BF until a a year) and I feel really embarrassed, ignorant and ashamed about that now. I too would have never said it or thought it was 'disgusting' or 'repulsive' though.

Then I got as much information as I could on BF before having my DD. She is only 6 weeks old, but despite some intial difficulties, lots of pain and mastitis twice I have never once considered stopping BF and although I initially planned to BF until 12 months, I now am thinking of 2 years plus, depending on DD, hopefully much longer.

I noticed that with my friends actually - there are 5 of us in a group and 2 of us got pg very close together. She had to stop bf after a couple of weeks, but the others found it odd (to varying degrees) when I was still doing it at varying ages - she just found it normal. It's pg/motherhood that brings it to your attention and makes you think

DS is only 11m and I have had the following:

"You're not still feeding him with those teeth, are you?" (My Mum evidently not aquainted with the mechanics of bf)

"So when are you going to start solids?" (this only last week! DS is mahoosive and 11m old! Was a genuine Q from a mother)

TSC - hello!

Have not been about much... have discovered that by hiding AIBU i am not suckered in as much. What a blessed relief, eh

Just seen DS was in hospital - hope he's ok? Poor little chap... didn't he have to get blue-lighted in a while ago as well?

Can't believe a year has gone already. This time 1 yr ago I was cursing, cursing...

tush sadly people often only like to read things that reinforce the prejudices ideas they already hold and newspapers know this.

As most people have little or no understanding of natural term bf rags that write about it as a freak show a more likely to sell than ones that say "oh, actually, it's not that bad"

Sorry missed loads of thread. I too thought twas bit wierd before i did it.

And i completely agree with georgimama...tis that we're so rare that is the sad or shocking thing...not what we're doing.

TSC - Hope your little boy is doing better now. DD3 has been in and out like a yo-yo with bronch/viral induced wheeze since tiny - it's horrible to see them struggle so.

I have had to explain to a senior paed. consultant that my 3y/o who at the time fed every other day-ish for 10-15 secs a side that she ate solids too (paed. asked when was she going to start solids after I explained how infrequently I was feeding).

DD2 wasn't the patient or even there - DD3 was in with her rubbish lungs and the paed was non-plussed at how I knew I still had milk for her (she was about 14m - I think - too many hospital visits to be sure) so I explained it I had no milk DD2 who was fully verbal would let me know. Hence the daft questions.....

I also had to explain self weaning as she had no idea how children could possibly stop bfing without the mother initiating it.

But the best thing is ordering meals for me (as I am a bfing mother) AND ordering meals for DD3, not giving her jars or ordering the special pureed menu for the under 2 year olds that the hospital provide for babies/young children who don't eat jars (or ordinary foods ) Total confusion from catering and nursing staff

We ordered DS (then 9 months) a hospital meal. The staff were amazed that he ate all the meat out the stew. And rather pleased as he was on nursing strike at the time. Not that anyone in a whole peadiatric ward realised that it was a nursing strike. It took MN to identify that one, and La Leche League to help me sort it out.

Sorry not time to read all these, but I know3 mums who feed at least one of their DC to about 5years old and siblings into toddlerhood. DD2 forbids me to say how long she carried on for and indeed I'm not sure when it was purely for comfort, but let's just say ks2

Oh I should say all very ordinary, totally not new age, mums.