Help please... not gaining weight

[buttonmoon78]

Brief background... ds (dc4) born Saturday 16th so now 11days old. I'm currently ebf. Bf and I have a chequered history - dc1 fed for 10wks, dc2 5months, dc3 5wks.

This time we've been going great guns, a slight latch adjustment on day 5 following nearly a 10% loss. On day 7 he'd regained 80g.

But when mw came today he'd stayed exactly the same. So unless we can put some weight on him by next visit (Fri am) we'll have to go up to the hospital for a medical review. He's still got a touch of jaundice too.

Please help. Dh is (in the nicest possible way as he's picked up the pieces twice now) almost expecting and waiting for me to fail again and I really need some decent help and advice.

Thanks.

Hi button. Congratulations on your DS

Can you tell us a little more about DS's feeding?

How are you feeling physically? Is it comfortable? How often does he feed? Has your milk come in? Can you see or hear him swallow? How many wet and dirty nappies are you getting/24hrs?

Hi button, and congrats :)

I'd also be interested in what happened before with your other DCs. And there's no such thing as fail. .

Yes a littke more info would be usefull.

But if your not soure and latch is good (no pain while feeding) then the best thing to do is feed as offten as possible. No more then 2hours between feed's even at night (perfrably more then that during the day) and as much skin to skin contact as you can manage. Good tip if you have older one's to look after two, is to wear baby in a streachy wrap without a top on and baby just in a nappy.

Oh and was it the same midwife who came out on day 7 as day 11? There can be a differenaces between different sets of scales.

Born at 4620g, day 5 3840g, day 7 3920g, day 11 3920g. Same mw days 5 & 11.

He's feeding every 1-3 hrs in the day and goes roughly 11pm-3.30-7 at night (in bed with me).

Physically I'm doing well - very few stitches this time, pretty well healed now. Mentally I'd been doing great - that 80g gain made me feel like superwoman.

Milk has def come in - I've been expressing am to top up in pm and have got an oz off one side while he's feeding at the other. You can hear and see him swallow and sometimes if he dozes off you can see unswallowed milk dribble out of his mouth.

It is comfortable now, once the first few seconds have passed and now I latch on like the bf counsellor suggested.

5/6+ wet and dirty nappies each day easily.

DC1 - failure to thrive due to severe reflux and getting all the necessary meds down her with bf was just too traumatic - far easier with ff. Also (not picked up til much later) I had an unhealed tear in the vaginal wall which required cauterising 5 times around the 5m mark which prob meant I was just not producing what was needed.

DC2 - ok til 5m, I stopped because I'd had enough.

DC3 - v slow to start, at 7 days I had a sinus inf, on anti-bs, both had thrush, supply problems despite feeding often. At 5 wks made decision to stop as I felt other dcs were suffering. Which is what I'm scared of now.

I feel selfish towards dcs 1-3 for wanting to do the best for dc4

Also, dcs 3 and 4 were induced at 38wks due to severe spd.

Sorry for the drip drip of info. Too much at once makes me a bit emotional.

Nearly went into meltdown then. Typed all of that one handed (ds sleeping on chest) and MN went offline for upgrade. Thought it was going to lose my post and got a bit cross!

Button, sorry to read you feel down....you were so upbeat about it all yesterday.

My feeling is that this is still within normal - everything ticks all the boxes except the fact the weight has plateaued for 4 days, and this indicates attention needs to be paid to the baby's intake, not that there is a crisis (IMO). So - if you can, ensure he has at least two and possibly three or four sides every feeding session, and keep him close. 1-3 hourly feeds are not that often - by my calculations he's feeding maybe 10 times in 24 hours? Waking once at night? Plenty of opportunities for more feeding....what do you think?

Oh I HATE it when that happens . Glad it saved your post.

Right, stop worrying about supply problems. At the moment, he's fine. You've certainly had a traumatic BFing journey with your other DC but you did really well by them, making the right choices for you and them at the time. This is no different, and if you carry on BFing it's not taking away from your other DC, it's just reinforcing what you feel is right for DC4.

There's not necessarily a problem with your bub at the moment. It could be that it's different scales (MW may have picked up a different set), different time of day, different wind blowing. He's not LOST weight.

Tell me about DC3 and supply problems. You clearly have milk now, so no supply problem. Output sounds ok - I'm guessing it's a guess - how close to, say, 8 nappies a day would you say? Are they all dirty as well as wet? What's the poo look like?

You're topping up with EBM - is this because you want a break? Is he cluster feeding in the evening? Can you just let him? I know this is tough with other DCs.

Sorry TT, cross post.

I'm planning on upping the frequency of feeds, waking him if necessary. Indeed, have been since lunchtime.

Nappies - anywhere between 5/6-8 I suppose. All dirty too though not always much - he's got a v windy bottom and every fart is accompanied by something! When he does something bigger it's dark mustard colour and grainy/bitty as you'd expect.

Topping up on mw and bfc advice. He does cluster feed but although it's a bit tying, it's also a good excuse for a snuggle

I've just posted on the July thread.
I was still waking BabyTwit every couple of hours day and night if I needed to at 11 days (mainly 'cos I'm silly about jaundice) until he had regained his birthweight and then extended it to 4 hours (although he rarely did that TBH). ( was advised this by my MW). I also eat porridge for breakfast every day and sometimes for supper as it is both comforting and I read on this board that it is good for your milk.
I have been having the wobbles off and on too, I find that taking each day/night or even each feed at a time helped see me through. And now he's still thriving at 4 weeks, although I had another (quite big) wobble last night. I won't lie, there have been times (I expect there still will be times ahead) when I've almost wished I hadn't bothered and had started out FF BUT these are fewer and fewer now.
Sorry for the essay, I just wanted to show you you're not alone in these feelings. And you are not a failure.

Oh congratulations. I didn't know you'd had him. The last thing I remember, he was still breech. That's what I get for going on holiday I s'pose.

Well done you, he's quite big, yes? I can only work in old money but he was 10lbs ish yes? I think sometimes a bigger baby is slower to gain weight as they find their natural line but I also think looking at his feeding patterns, there's plenty of room for some extra feeds in there.

You've had some fabulous advice and I can't add much on that score but I can tell you I'm really pleased your little boy is here!

Thanks all. I'm feeling a bit better tonight. We've been feeding every 60-90mins max with constant cuddles between.

showofhands hope you had a good time? He was 9lb6. I too only work in old money but its waaay beyond me right now to work it back as the mws all insist on weighing in grams!

How did you get on last night? Is there anyway you can get help with your other DC's either at your house or them going away for a little 'holiday' so you can rest more?

Hope your more positive mood has continued

Last night was ok - I set my alarm for 2.5 hourly intervals and fed then. He's fed all morning (own choice) and has now been asleep for 45mins so hoping for another 20-30mins before I wake him again.

Feeling a lot better today. MW wanted to come back tomorrow but has agreed to leave it until Tuesday which makes me feel like I have a fair crack at the whip. If he's still struggling on Tuesday then I'll supplement with formula if that's what it takes, I just don't want to go down that road just yet!

Mum went home yesterday evening and DH back tonight. He's then taking us all down to my mum's this weekend so kids can roar about on the beach whilst I spend all my time trying to fatten the boy up.

Hoping this will have the desired effect and everything will be fine.

Are you feeling better after your wobble? It's such a confusing emotional time, no?!

Oh that's great, it's so much harder when you don't feel like it's going as it 'should' be. Add the tiredness and emotion of it all it's no wonder we all get overwhelmed sometimes. I found the first 2 weeks I was constantly re-adjusting, what worked with right after birth didn't work with engorgement, that didn't work when the boobs had settled. ANd each time I'd have a wobble.
I feel a bit better today, I'm back to my normal frame of mind right now it's going well, I have a plan (WRT mastitis) and I'm happy to go with the flow Wobbles are less than they were although I imagine I'll have another at some point.
I am pretty much only 2/3 weeks ahead of you with this, and already I can look back and think I'm so glad I took baby steps and just kept going. I have found the BF threads really helpful on here and will continue to read up.
Have a lovely weekend, get as much skin to skin as possible and feed feed feed, and if you need to be, be selfish for you and BabyButton.

Thank you for all the advice! S put on 80g again when weighed today so has clawed back 160g of his 420g loss so far.

MW pleased (so am I) and am planning to continue with the 2/3 hourly feeding as a max interval.

Jaundice lessening too.

That's good to hear buttonmoon, that must be a relief.

That's great button, such a relief for you all.