15 week old exclusively breast fed rejecting bottle of ebm.

[fells]

My dd is 15 weeks old and exclusively breast fed. Up until 4 weeks ago she would take the odd bottle of ebm. since then she has completely refused the bottle. We have tried everything -different teats, me trying, my husband trying, my mum trying, different times, waiting until she is really hungry, trying when she isn't that hungry, a cup/beaker etc... Yesterday i tried putting some formula in the bottle but this failed too. It is probably our fault as we only gave her ebm when it suited us (when we were at weddings, out on the odd evening etc)we probbaly should have made the bottle a regular thing instead of leaving a week or so between ebm feeds.

Does anyone have a similar expereience?
Could it just be a phase and in a couple of weeks she will take it again? Although I am enjoying breast feeding I have depressing images of doing it for another year (which i don't want to do) and not ever being able to go out without her for more than a few hours. On bad days I almost wish I'd never breast fed in the first place!

She's only 10 and a half pounds so I have no plans to wean her just yet.

Any advice would be gratefully received!

What temperature's the milk? We found DS wouldn't take it unless it was really warm, same as body temp milk is.

Try giving her a little bit each day - an ounce or so. I did this with DS - he would only take it from me (used to look at DH like he was mad for trying, even from quite tiny!). But that was only initially - when he realised that breastmilk didn't just come from boobs, he was quite happy to take it from DH or whoever.

One thing I did was breastfeed him, then unlatch him and quickly sneak the bottle into his mouth. Am sure this is not the Done Thing, but it worked for us

It's so difficult to say. It could be a phase, but OTOH, what's a bottle compared to a cuddle and a feed all in one?
I would keep trying and see what happens. Also, you have done the hardest bit. I'm still b/f at nearly 13m and once they start weaning it just gets easier and easier as you are needed less and less. It's nothing like those first few, very hard months. Promise. And well done you for getting this far

I did that too. Snuck up on him. Sneaky tactic, but hey And yes, definitely needs to be nice and warm.

thanks everyone. I've tried unlatching her and sneaking the bottle in. Sometimes she will have a few sucks and then realises she's been conned and looks disgusted! other times she will not even do that.

If i keep trying i am worried she will develop really negative associations with the bottle and it will never work. I was wondering whether to leave it completely for 2 or 3 weeks. Do you think by the time i get round to trying it again it could be too late?

Hi Fells, went through exactly the same thing and know others who did same. Tried lots of things, though not different teats at first. Left it, tried again a few weeks later, tried Nuk teat as seemed quite soft. A couple of days of trying at different times of the day, wearing DH's t-shirt etc, it started to work. One day she suddenly took 4oz off DH then 6oz following night - I had stayed well clear (though we'd tried that before too). It was like a switch had flipped that told her it was ok again so I think it was a phase.
I was also worried that leaving it meant no return to the bottle, but it didn't work out that way for us - hope this happens for you too.

I tried everything with DD2 - I found a cheap brown squashy teat did the job in the end.

And we kept going with exclusive breastmilk to six months - even though I went back to work at four - and breastfeeding till around 18 months.

As Beansprout says, do hang on in there. This bit is tough, breastfeeding or not, I reckon. Do NOT worry you'll be breastfeeding forever, sweetie, you won't.

Oh and one of these days you'll get a full night's sleep too

My ds did exactly the same with a variety of teats but never had any problems with MAM teats and bottles. He took to them so well I can give them to him any time, even after a gap of a month or so. The milk does need to be body temperature. Interestingly, when I was failing to get him to accept Avent teats, he would take cold ebm from a trainer cup. Funny creature. I think most people find their babies will accept some kind of teat, it's often a matter of finding one that's most realistic for them. Good luck.

Thanks. I think I'll leave it for a bit and try again with Mam teats on an avent bottle. (that was what I had been using). Should the bottle the teat is attached to make any difference? If that fails I might try Nuk bottle and teat.

Has anyone tried depriving their baby of breast until they eventually cave in and take a bottle? Extreme but could work...?

Another quick question does anyone have a breast fed 15 week old who sleeps through the night?!

Is it true that formula can help them to sleep through or is this a bit of a myth?

I had a similar experience. I had got out of the habit of giving him a bottle and when we did, he was very grumpy and took about 40 minutes of persevering to get it all down him (breast feeding takes 10 minutes every four hours.) Tried a size 3 teat instead of the newborn 3 and it worked a treat. Poor little (18 pound 4 month old) thing! You will know if this will work for you so don't try if you think that isn't the problem.

I breast feed and four weeks ago he started sleeping through - three days after I put him on a fixed routine.

I think formula does work for some babies but I have tried it in the past - he took 9 ounces of formula at 10pm and still woke three hours later! Worth a try though - you can still express when you give formula so you don't lower your milk supply.

Has the milk been previously frozen? DS2 would only take "fresh" milk and would turn his nose up at any that had been previously frozen.

FWIW, both DS1 & 2 were exclusively breastfed and DS1 slept through from 10pm-7am from 12 weeks. DS2 was a little later but similar. Every baby is different though - we were lucky!

The Nuk teats seem to fit avent bottles, so that could save you a bit of money - I didn't know this and bought the bottles but still use them as I quite like the colours (sad, I know!)

DD slept through at 15 weeks for about a week (she woke but was satisfied with a dummy), then started to want food 2/3 times a night for a while. At 17 weeks I introduced a bedtime bottle of formula. I'd got fed up of wasting ebm when she refused - though I realised I should offer only small amounts - and she seemed more accepting of the bottle with formula than with ebm and as I was going to give up bf gradually it worked out ok. As it is, I haven't dropped any more feeds as am happy day-feeding.

At 20 weeks we put her in her own room and I started to wonder if she needed the food or just needed it to settle herself so I went cold turkey on night feeds a few nights later . Each night she settled down more quickly and things are much better now. I'm not sure whether formula is the reason - more our being brave and not caving in too quickly when she cried out in the night. I'm not saying anyone else caves in, but I know I did.

As for the 'they'll drink it if they're hungry enough' theory, that could work. DH tried to use this tactic but I am too soft and I didn't want her to be even more hateful of the bottle by letting her cry and cry and at the time, I was in two minds - wanting to stop bf and desperate to get her to take the bottle, and resigning myself to bf to 6m and then panic about what to do next!

Hope things start working out soon - I'm sure they will!

Racers, when you say cold turkey do you mean you ignored her if she woke in the night and let her settle herself back to sleep or did you go in to her room and stroke her etc every few mins but just not feed her? Is that controlled crying?

Soupdragon, did you wake your ds up at 10pm to feed him? Or did you put him to bed at 10pm?

We replaced the boob with a dummy, is the way I'd put it - so we were still going in, but only briefly and of course DH could go to her as well as me. We would also say a few comforting words and/or stroke her face a little bit but that's about it. We also have let her cry it out for about 10 minutes or so by which time she has fallen back to sleep. This morning she was crying for a bit longer but not really upset iyswim. Breaks my heart but DH seems to have a good instinct on whether to leave her or not as she went back to sleep, we both had more sleep and she woke up as happy as Larry!

I think I have been guilty of going to her and feeding her too quickly, before trying something else - I'll know better next time! That said, there's nothing wrong with a nice bf to settle your baby, it's just that I was just getting sooo tired and we'd read that they don't necessarily need food in the night from around 3m and she was approaching 5m so we thought it fair to try!

I've also heard the tactic to reduce the feeding times in the night (I was extending them in the hope it would fill her up for longer!), until there is little feeding going on and it's just the brief comfort thing. I decided to go whole hog and it seems to have worked for us.

I wouldn't call it controlled crying as we didn't wait x number of minutes etc. We are far too random in our methods to do stuff like that LOL! Apart from bedtime, we don't have much in the way of routines, not by the clock anyway.

Knowing that I had an operation looming, I was giving my daughter ebm in a bottle but mainly bf. Two weeks ago she refused the bottle. I tried to keep calm and persist but found it so distressing so gave up.

This week, I thought I would try out the theory that if she would be hunry enough perhaps she would take a bottle with ebm... It worked. She skipped one feed and then took the next two with a bottle. I then breastfeed for the rest of the day and then went to give her another bottle at the end of the day and she refused.

I've decided to wait closer to the date of the operation and enjoy feeding her until then. At least I know that she will take a bottle eventually when she needs to.

I've posted this tip so many times, but have you tried wrapping a bra you've worn round the bottle, so it smells of breastmilk? Might make it more comforting for her.

No I haven't tried it.... Only new to this site. Thanks for the tip. I might wait for my mum to come up before the op and see if dd will take it from mum with the bra, wrapped around it.

Thanx

Just hope it works! Might be more effective if you are out of the way so dd can't see the original and best is on offer just a few feet away... she's not daft, is she?