Help please - 3 day old baby, poor latch, raw nipples, no help from hospital

[Odille]

I'd appreciate any advice or ideas...

It'd be another thread but BF support was awful, MW contradicted themselves and each other and the ward was full of mums who ended up on formula after 1-2 days.

I'm literally just home with an almost 3-day old baby and need some help. Baby is interested and will suck but I don't know if he's ever latched on properly. I don't think I'm getting him at a wide enough gape and so it's maybe only nipple and a tiny bit of areola in his mouth. Can't see much to tell but as of today my nipples are agony during and after feeding. He has had several feeds of a few ml of colostrum (hand expressed / syringe fed). Did I mention that my nipples are agony? He lost10% of bodyweight already but we were discharged so I assume ok, but general PN care was shite so who knows.

Community MW will visit tomorrow but I don't know when or how much help they'll be. Advice please - tips, facts, who I can get face to face help from?

thanks

Also - delivery was forceps, baby slightly jaundiced but ok now.

Any book tips also appreciated.

I really feel for you. I went through the same thing myself. With hindsight I can see that I put myself under far too much pressure to breastfeed. If you do have to give up please don't feel guilty.

However, I did manage to carry on (for 16 months actually).

I have two words of advice for you "NIPPLE SHIELDS". Without them I would have given up. One midwife did tell that it wasn't "proper breast feeding"!! I didn't care. They stop the pain and bleeding and helped my baby to latch on - something he was really struggling to do.

Good luck

(bump) other people with experience will be along soon.

I hope things settle down, if 12% weight lost then that means readmission so don't panic.

Do you have the NCT details for BF support details here

Too late for tonight but you can ring at 8am. I know that all the MW will have differing advice which doesn't help- it was the same for me.

Will be thinking of you- just do what you can tonight and hopefully your community MW will be useful tomorrow. The NCT may have a local counsellor who can come round to your house too.

I know some MNetters frown on it but am sending gentle hugs. This will get better. Day 3 is very hard emotionally and physically- remember your milk will be coming in soon. Try nipple cream I used Mothercare's own was good. Let your nipples air dry after rubbing in a little of your milk or cream before sticking in some breast pads.

All the best.

OK, hang on in there.

Firstly, do you have a local children's centre or similar place? There should be a breastfeeding support group. Could you get there?

Also google 'breastfeeding support' in your local area. There may be someone who can arrange a home visit.

BfN helpline is 0300 100 0212
BfN Supporterline 0300 100 0210

Have you got any kind of nipple cream? It doesn't matter if it is a branded specialist cream or petroleum jelly - a moist environment is best for healing.

Put your baby to the breast as much as possible - skin to skin if you can.

whereabouts are you??

God how awful for you - sounds like a terrible experience.

Anyway, here's some suggestions for now.....

• google biological nurturing. It's a way of relaxed, laid back bfing that enables the baby to latch on and use his instincts to feed.
• also look at Dr Jack Newman's site. There are good videos of a good latch and good drinking.

-have a look at kellymom.com too

You really need to wait until the mouth is open really wide, then quickly bring the whole baby to the breast. Don't hold the back of his head, just around the shoulders.

It would be helpful for you to find a breastfeeding support group. The community mw should be able to tell you where they are or someone on here can look them up for you if you tell us where you are.

You can also ring one of the helplines which are listed down the right hand side of this blog.

congrats, and don't worry - it's very early days and there is a lot of help out there (and on here).

www.babyfriendly.org.uk/pdfs/bfyb_english2.pdf

This leaflet has got some hints and tips on positioning and attachment. THe most important thing is that your baby is able to tip their head back and open their mouth as wide as possible so they get a big mouthful of breast - ideally they should look as if they are 'munching' on it and have little puffed out cheeks.

It is difficult to convey without being there, so if you can get to a bf group that will be so great.

OP- the NCT Breastfeeding helpline is open until 10pm my apologies you still can call tonight if you want to talk to somebody.

You've got the numbers below, but in the meantime there's a video I found quite helpful: .

This is a really good guide on how to get a good latch

www.sunderland.nhs.uk/admin/mopil/pdf/20060405104105.pdf

Congratulations on your new baby and sorry you are finding bf hard at the moment. I'm not qualified to offer professional advice but I'm feeding my second DD at the moment and have found it really hard both times-but ultimately well worth the pain and heartache. Like you my real life support was pretty average...anyway someone with more knowledge will be along soon to help but for what it's worth my tips etc:

Tonight-call one or more of the helplines-NCT, la leche etc.

Also try skin to skin with your baby and the biological nurturing method-prop yourself up in bed so you're comftable and gently reclined, put baby vertically on your chest between boobs, allw baby to bob about and find nipple, should be less painful for you and can help to get back to basics

Also try to forget all conflicting advice to date on positing etc. For me it all got better 12 weeks in with DD1 when I forgot it all and just got her mouth level with my nipple, leaned a bit forward when she gaped and rolled her on. Had spent ages working through all the steps they teach you but in reality it all happens quickly and for me trying to get all the steps perfectly correct just over complicated things

Tomorrow-get hold of some lansinoh cream-purple tube in boots/supermarket. Use it all the time.
Has your son been checked for a tongue tie? No personal experience but I think this can hinder bf.

You can take Paracetamol for the pain. Helps relax you a bit too.

Sorry posting on phone so have probably missed lots of important stuff and have to run now but keep going it really does get better and it's so normal to find it hard and painful to start with. It's a skill that both of you need to learn.

Good luck

Thank you thank you thank you

I will look into the links and advice now.

Sorry op-my rambling vague post crossed with many other more helpful people. Wishing you well though. Hang in there

Sorry op-my rambling vague post crossed with many other more helpful people. Wishing you well though. Hang in there

Odille exactly where you are now both times with both dcs. The utter misery of it! When my dd latched on I used to yelp out in pain. Both times, the bfing counsellor at the bfing clinic got me there in the end. But also for my ds (dc number 1), a bottle of formula got him and me off to sleep for a bit and helped immeasurably!
Also, both times, the very very worst day was the beginning of the improvement, so if you can possibly stick at it, you can get there in the end.

Good luck!

squeeze your nipps into a flatter shape, wait til baby's mouth open at the widest point and shove in
it is just a knack, and it gets easier.
I had a crap latch at first, then I lay on my back on sofa, and my MIL placed baby on top of my boob and that was the first experience of a good latch, it will just happen.
lansinoh is the best stuff for nipps, dont use anything else.

The Sunderland thing has great advice on exaggerated latch, which I found so much easier than waiting for my son to open his mouth wide enough. Basically, hold boob as if burger, pressing down with your thumb to tilt the nipple slightly upwards, stroke down from nose to chin with nipple to help baby open mouth, shove nipple in and immediately let go. Really helps when you just can't gently guide any more.

Also ring community midwives and ask for their help. Don't be scared of a formula top up if you HAVE to - is better than a floppy lethargic dehydrated baby and you can always work back towards feeding. (bitter experience)

Well done on getting so far.

Back again-glad you've had lots of good advice. Really feel for you day 3 is so hard ...

Found these saved links from a few wks ago when I was googling for help in tears and in agony-

www.llli.org/llleaderweb/lv/lvaugsep00p63.html

www.llli.org/nb/nbjulaug99p120.html

www.nbci.ca/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=75:when-latching&catid=5:information&Itemid=17

www.nbci.ca/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=48:sore-nipples&catid=5:information&Itemid=17

Kellymom.com/bf/start/basics/latch-resources.html

Thanks everyone. I was really freaking out with stress when I first posted. I am so glad for the support when it was needed.

Well I have a happy update - the community midwife was lovely and gave lots of one to one help during her first visit on Sat. After being discharged on Friday she weighed the baby on Sat and Sun and 2 days after the 10% loss he has put on 100g! So I can relax a bit now.

Also - I have Lansinoh. Oh what sweet stuff that is!

Selks and chocolatemacadamias particular thanks for the links, the info on various holds was really useful. The rugby and side-lying ones have worked well for me this weekend.

I can now get on with enjoying my new baby

Glad things are improving Odille - hang on in there, you'll be a pro in no time!

Great stuff Odille

Fantastic weight gain - keep it up.

Thanks for the update too.