Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

right - this time I want to 'succeed' at BFing. Top (nip) tips? Books to read in advance?

20 replies

tigana · 03/05/2011 22:41

I'm Only Just Pregnant, so have several months to prep!
Tried to bf DS (now 5 1/2) and gave up due to nipples like minced meat and agonising feeds (so bad latching I guess?) and not very helpful MW ("they look ok to me"....Hmm)
Moving on...

I have read clare byam-cook "what to expect ..." but note that not all MNers seem to rate it?
A 'tech-y' how to sort of book would be great.

OP posts:
Loopymumsy · 04/05/2011 06:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MrsTerryPratchett · 04/05/2011 07:59

I had nips like chopped liver too. I second the "get help the second you need it theory". THE SECOND you need it. Apart from that, good luck!

Northernlurker · 04/05/2011 08:21

How old was ds when you stopped?
Personally I found things a bit sore when feeding dd1. Nothing discernibly wrong with the latch and the soreness faded after a week or two. With dd2 and dd3 everything was fine from that start. Tbh I have always thought my poor nipples had to go through a toughning up phase and once that was done they were sorted. That being the case you may well find your second baby is easier anyway as the nipples have been subjected to the vacuum super suck already Grin

Kirk1 · 04/05/2011 08:46

You could try toughening up your nipples a few weeks before your EDD, use an electric pump to try and get used to the sensation. I found the first week baby's mouth wasn't quite big enough for a comfortable latch, and that first clamp can be a real shock!

Things that helped me: Make sure you're comfortable when you start. Have a feeding chair or special corner of the sofa or bed and only use this place to feed in the beginning. It sounds silly, but having got properly comfortable with drink to hand and all the cushions arranged "just so" seemed to make a huge difference to me. The more relaxed you are, the easier you'll cope with that fumbling first few feeds. It also means you're comfortable and don't want to get up so you're more likely to feel inclined to keep trying if baby doesn't latch first time... Wink

Rub some of the milk on your nipples. I had trays full of nipple creams, but after feeding DC1 for a few months I never used them. Your milk is better at it!

Make sure as much of your breast goes in baby's mouth as possible. Even if you end up unlatching and strting again a few times, don't let baby suck on just the nipple as this will end up with you getting sore - trust me on this! Wink

If you have cracked nipples, or get really sore, express the milk and feed from bottles. Do express though, even if you decide to go to FF, as full breasts are really painful! If you are stopping suddenly you'll want to express just enough to stop the tight feeling, until you stop producing milk. Your body adjusts to demand, but there is a lag!

Buy a cabbage with large outer leaves and store it in the fridge. Breast pads and cold flannels are all useful, but trust me, when your milk comes in you won't care that you're walking around with a grocer's shop in your bra, nothing beats a cabbage leaf for soothing engorged breasts! Savoy is best for some reason, I already have mine chilling!

Finally, don't beat yourself up if you find you want to switch to FF. I'm a BF advocate, I still think it's a good idea for everyone to at least try but in the end what matters is that you and your baby are both happy. If you find yourself FF in afew weeks or months after the baby's born, you haven't "failed" I'd rather see a contented Mum and baby bottle feeding than an overtired, over-stressed BF Mum who resents being a milk-bar for a baby that's not latching properly and not getting enough food.

I hope this isn't too long! I only meant to give a few pointers and it turned into a lecture Blush

EauRouge · 04/05/2011 09:15

I second The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding, it's an old fashioned title but it's full of up to date (the 8th edition is the newest one) accurate info, it sorts the facts from the myths! If there is a LLL group near you then I would recommend going along before your baby arrives, they are very welcoming to pregnant women.

Athrawes · 04/05/2011 09:24

Find your LLL, make friends and get phone numbers so that you can call as soon as baby comes out. I'd ask one of them to come visit you whether you think you need it or not, as you might just need a bit of tweeking on technique even if it feels ok. You will be fine.

nethunsreject · 04/05/2011 09:50

For me, the politics of breastfeeding was a real eye opener.

womanly art is fabulous.

local support is essential.

nobetterthanthat · 04/05/2011 09:54

The politics of Breastfeeding was the reason for my 'success' after 2 'failures'.

Go to bf groups before the baby is born so you have already met the people who can help you most when you need the help.

crikeybadger · 04/05/2011 09:58

I'd recommend Ina May's Guide to Breastfeeding and Kate Evans' The Food Of Love'.

Also google biological nurturing and have a look at some of Dr Suzanne Colson's ideas. It is so simple, but really makes so much sense.

CBC seems to have some rather odd ideas concerning breastfeeding, so that's why she's not that popular on mn. Of course, there will always be mums that like her approach though.

Personally I like the blogs of howbreastfeedingworks.com and analyticalarmadillo. For discussions about ideas surrounding breastfeeding (not just the 'how to do it').

Hope all goes well and stay in touch. Smile

ecat · 04/05/2011 13:26

"The food of love" by Kate Evans is fantastic.

tigana · 04/05/2011 20:06

thanks all.
I can't remember exactly when I stopped bfing ds - it was all a bit of a blur of tears and bleeding nips and engorgement. Maybe soon after 2 weeks. Switched to expressing as I wanted him to get the milk and then as milk production went down, supplemented EBM feeds with FF until I think about 3 or 4 months when he went exclusively FF. I am still haunted by the tortured ssqqquueeeaaakk of the manual breast pump 5 years later!

This time I am SO prepared to ask for help as soon as I need it, and to be prepared in advance with stuff like cabbages and nipple cream and proper information.

OP posts:
nethunsreject · 04/05/2011 20:10

tigana, i ihad exctly the same exp as you first time.

happily, i am now bfing my 11mth old! Grin

You can do it! Smile

tigana · 04/05/2011 20:19

Thank you!
I'm off to add to my amazon wishlist!

OP posts:
latrucha · 04/05/2011 20:39

Tigana - where are you? Is there a local breastfeeding support group near you? A great many bf problems are down to the latch and someone having a proper look is the best thing if there are problems. Discomfort is normal, pain is not.

The thing that saved my bf DD when I couldn't get to a group at a crucial moment were the videos here. I watched them while feeding over and over, scrutinising her latch. We got there! They are great and Jack Newman is fab.

Dotty38 · 04/05/2011 22:32

I had a very similar experience to you bf DD1. I now have DD2 (10weeks) am ebf but it hasn't been easy.

Skin to skin straight after birth and as much skin to skin as possible in those early days. What worked better for me and DD2 in the hours after birth and those early days was preventing anyone other than me handling her when helping her to latch, I personally feel that strangers hands on your baby and your boob is not helpful when trying to get the little one to feed. I also did not do any of this waking the baby up to feed or stripping clothes off to stimulate them by making them cold to latch on it just stresses them into feeding and did not help my babies (this was the advice with DD1 to try and get her to latch better, I knew no different so just did it but it made her worse not better).

I think get prepared to get help immediately if you so much as just sense a problem starting. Have the numbers available and get to know a breast feeding counsellor or LLL representative. Definately don't let your nipples get so damaged that your at risk of infection and in agony. This time round with me while her latch was a bit iffy for the first few weeks I would give her a bottle to rest my nipples and express while her dad fed the bottle, if I had expressed to give I did but if I didn't I gave formula and without guilt this time as I now rationally know that formula is not bad for them as I previously felt it was! While things were establishing I carried on giving her a bottle once or twice in 24 hours to allow myself a break. From about week 4/5 things became comfortble and we're now doing OK with it from a latch and comfort point of view.

Noop · 16/05/2011 16:17

Dr Jack Newman's visual guide to breastfeeding. Ok so it's a DVD not a book but it was absolutely brilliant!

Here is the link
www.drjacknewman.com/proddetails-intl.asp?ID=1

There are some video clips on the website but the dvd goes into much more detail.

duvet · 17/05/2011 14:41

Yeah I second Dr Jack Newman's stuff , book and video clips - very helpful.

MoonFaceMamaaaaargh · 17/05/2011 15:32

Start now by telling people you won't be seeing them straight after the birth. Though if they want to drop off some tea or come take out your ds they are welcome.

Then, when your lo arrives snuggle up for a good week. EVERY time they so much as squeak latch them on. Yes it will be a lot but you will get lots of practice at latches and stimulate your supply. If the latch doesn't feel right take them straight off and try again...no need to worry that they are hank marvin as the last feed only finished ten minutes ago. Wink

bluechik · 17/05/2011 21:22

Completely agree re. skin to skin, straight after the birth and as much as possible in the first weeks. Prepare to be feeding constantly in the first few months and let it happen, it's the baby building up your supply. Set up one (or more) places to breastfeed around the house - big glass of water handy (I was really thirsty in the beginning); telephone; Lansinoh; book or TV remote; cushions or whatever makes you comfy. Don't rely on your Midwife or Health Visitor (sadly). Double check anything they say with a breastfeeding professional. Have NCT/LLL helpline numbers handy and ring them if you are having concerns.

Go to a local breastfeeding drop-in (again, run by LLL or similar, not your HV) and get your latch checked. Get them to teach you to feed lying down so that you can snooze while the baby feeds. Don't try to limit your baby to scheduled feeds at least until after 12 weeks when your supply is more settled. Most importantly - have faith that your body is capable and you can do this. I would even say, provided your baby looks healthy, is feeding often, is growing out of his/her clothes and is having regular wet/dirty nappies, don't bother weighing them unless you want to, and certainly ignore anyone who tells you to 'top them up' with formula for any reason.

It will be worth it when they get over the first stage and suddenly they are getting the feeds over with in a few minutes, without any faff with bottles!

For information online, you can't beat www.kellymom.com or tiktok's posts on Mumsnet. Would also second recommendations re. the Politics of Breastfeeding and the Food of Love.

Best of luck.

japhrimel · 17/05/2011 22:06

I'd recommend 'The Food of Love' too. Libby Purves' 'How Not To Be A Perfect Mother' is supportive too - she's realistic about how hard it is at first but how fantastically lazy it is after that! Grin

Also, get the numbers for the NCT and LLL helplines and print them out and put them somewhere obvious (by the phone?) in the nursery or on the fridge. And find local bfing clinics and cafes near you and tell your partner you'll want to be taken to these things as soon as you have issues ( everyone has some issues IME).

If you have mashed nipples, something is wrong with your latch or your baby's mouth (e.g tongue tie).

Kellymom.com, Jack Newman's video and the askdrsears.com website also helped me hugely.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page