Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

Oh no! I'm the last one breastfeeding.

33 replies

KD0706 · 21/04/2011 21:00

Just wanted to offload a bit.
I know I'm being daft but I feel really isolated. DD is just shy of a year old and five out of my six NCT antenatal frends started BFing. But gradually they've all stopped and now the last one has stopped.

I have never given DD a bottle and have a notion to keep breastfeeding her for a while yet, so that I won't have to faff with formula at all.

But a part of me feels a bit odd at being the last one left.

OP posts:

eggyminniewhingesagain · 21/04/2011 21:03

Loads of us here who have fed for longer - it's fab you are both still enjoying the feeding.

DS just stopped of his own accord a few weeks ago at 25/26months - I never though I/he would feed for so long but when he got to around 12 months I realised he was going to carry on for a good while and just went with the flow[busmile]

MonkeyandParrot · 21/04/2011 21:16

Are there any La Leche leauge groups near you? They seem to attract extended breastfeeders. I felt a bit odd still feeding my 17 month old while preganant and tandem feeding (DD1 self weaned when DD2 was 4 weeks old at 18 months) but by going to a LL group I meet mums doing what i did and it was nice to know I wasn't the only one! DD2 is now 14 months and still breastfeeding - enjoy it :-) I was upset when DD1 weaned as I missed the closeness but she wasn't bothered.

Guitargirl · 21/04/2011 21:21

I was the last one of my antenatal group too - at 20 months - so not really long enough to warrant the term 'extended breastfeeder'. Didn't bother me - felt strangely quite proud of myself as we had a rough start with bf.

With the second DC most people don't have that point of reference, I know with me it was more a point of comparison between how long I had fed DC1 and DC2 who both self-weaned almost the same stage even though I was convinced DC2 would go longer. Wasn't meant to be. Make the most of this time - it will all be forgotten all too soon!!

RitaMorgan · 21/04/2011 21:24

I was the last one too from 5 months - 8.5 months now. I have met a woman at baby group who is breastfeeding a 10 month old though. My friends have all been very positive and supportive, so I don't feel like the odd one out really even when everyone else brings out a bottle and I am wrestling a nosy baby!

tassisssss · 21/04/2011 21:25

don't feel odd, enjoy it!

I BF all mine until at least 15 months and it was lovely. Lots of people do it for much longer.

RhinestoneCowgirl · 21/04/2011 21:32

I'm the odd one out in RL, but I come on MN to feel the love from other longer term bfers . I worried a lot about 'still' bf with DS, but with DD I'm happy to go on - she is 2.4yrs and feeds a few times a day

Enjoy your DD.

nuttyone · 21/04/2011 21:51

They recommend up to a year for 'health' reasons. The evidence is sketchy but you can always drop that in when you feel uncomfortable :-)
I fed to 13 months. I have been trying to give up because No 2 is coming in Sept and i feel embarrassed at the thought of DD trying to get on the other one when out for lunch!!! She's quite persistent still but we are only 10 days since i last caved in.
People do tandem feed though ( i had a colleague who did) more common abroad i think. My partner wanted me to stop at 6 months... A man thing i think

RitaMorgan · 21/04/2011 21:56

nuttyone - babies need breastmilk til 12 months, or you have to give them a breastmilk substitute. I wouldn't say that is sketchy, it's a fact!

Original poster

KD0706 · 21/04/2011 22:26

Thanks everybody. I know it's not extended BFing but it does feel a bit like it.

She was nine weeks prem so I'm using that as my 'excuse' to keep going beyond a year (she's one on 29th).

I might look into LLL meetings. It would be nice to mix with some other longer term BFers.

Nobody has said anything derogatory to me so maybe it's all in my mind.

OP posts:

BertieBotts · 21/04/2011 22:31

I'm the last one feeding in my NCT group too. Only two others fed past a year, one stopped very soon after, and it was just me and another lady who fed up until 2-ish. DS is now 2.7 and I'm still feeding him. Haven't mentioned it in front of the group for ages but was brave enough to feed him at our meet up in the park today :) Was just 2 others there who I knew wouldn't be judgemental so I just did it. Nobody blinked. Although one of the other 2.7 yr olds was extremely curious and kept trying to see what DS was so interested in! He has a younger brother who is breastfed so I expect he was just a bit surprised that DS still did what his baby brother does.

I have found LLL wonderful, met some lovely people there. Even if you have to travel a bit to get to one, it's definitely worth it.

eggyminniewhingesagain · 21/04/2011 22:32

Very few people knew I was still feeding, I never hid it, but once DS was older it was only at bedtimes and naptimes really, after around 18 months or so.

At the beginning of the year I was chatting with my SIL about having any more babies and she said something like 'URgh, the breastfeeding, doing that again' to which I said 'Again? I haven't finished feeding DS yet' and she looked at me [bushock] I thought it was pretty funny. I tried to avoid going on about it but it seems I had been too subtle.

AngelDog · 21/04/2011 22:35

I was the last one in my NCT group at 5 months - DS is still feeding now at 15 m.o.

I like MN for moral support. :)

bonkers20 · 21/04/2011 22:41

The long termers are out there and I hope you find them as it's nice to share the delights (and trials) of BF a toddler. I BF DS1 until he was 3 and still going strong with DS2 who has just turned 2.

Enjoy it!

BoosMaw · 21/04/2011 22:48

I agree with the LLL suggestion, I've been to 2 different groups (living in 2 different areas), found them supportive and helpful.

Try not to worry about what other people are thinking, it's far more important that you and your DD are happy with your arrangement. Also it may be tricky to stop BFing an older baby or toddler if they're not up for making the change. FWIW my firstborn BF for 3.5 years (!!). I think I would have been horrified if I had known in advance. In our defence she has dairy allergy and formula/cow milk wasn't really an option. I had however been telling her for at least the latter 2 years that BF is for babies and she was a big girl now, to no avail, she was determined!

I now have a DS who stopped BF when he was 11 months old, his choice, he just stopped one day. I was not prepared for that, following on from my experience with DD I had expected to be continuing for much longer than that. He refused to drink anything at all for about 2 weeks (cue much panic from me, I pretty much force fed him fruit puree to keep him hydrated). He came round to the idea of cows milk gradually and now drinks some from a tommee tippee cup. I've never used a bottle, though I'm no BF martyr, things just turned out that way.

Hope it all works out well for you.

mawbroon · 21/04/2011 22:54

Loads of us feeding at 12 months + on MN.

ds2 is 13months and ds1 is years and years older and "still" nursing.

Please don't feel odd

everyspring · 21/04/2011 22:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

schroedingersdodo · 22/04/2011 05:36

DS is 1yo and I'm not the last one in the group, but definitely the only one who feeds during meetings. I'm very proud of doing it in public as I'd like people to see it as natural. I've heard surprised comments from the other mums but I feel they respect me for doing what I think is right.

cinnamongreyhound · 22/04/2011 06:56

I have been amazed this time around at the fact that the few bf mums have stopped at 6 months, ds2 is 7 months. I feel very isolated too but with ds1 I didn't know anyone who even started so I guess it's been better this time! I actually find it irritating how many people ( including gp and hv) say 'still bf? Well done you've done so well'. With ds1 the first 8 weeks were a challenge but other than that bf has got to be easier than ff so not sure why I've done so well. There are so many bf on mm but it is nice to have someone in rl to share it with I agree. Enjoy feeding your baby, ds1 stopped at 15 months :(

SlightlyScrambled · 22/04/2011 07:07

Your post made me think and I realised that I've stayed bfing longer than anyone I know in RL.

But not longer than ladies on MN and they are real too so I don't feel left out at all.

It's good that your friends haven't said anything negative and by doing that I think they are supportive of your decision.

And I'm always very thankful of bf when we get sick and dd recuperates faster than me or DH.

Dd is 15 months and no end in sight.

ReshapeWhileDamp · 22/04/2011 10:14

I was the last one in my NCT group too by about a year. We had excellent bf take-up and maintenance rates as a group - at 9 months, I think 6 out of 9 were still feeding. I knew I'd be the last to stop, though. [bugrin]

There are loads here who feed longer-term, and you might find that friends whom you thought had stopped are still doing it too. [buwink]

nethunsreject · 22/04/2011 10:24

Bfn groups are good too. There are plenty of postt-1 yr feeders at the one I go to.

Don't feel odd - be proud of yourself. WHO recommends to aged 2 at least, so you are following recommendations.

I doubt your pals think anything negative of it - when I had ds1 only one of our group bfed past a year and it was a non-issue for everyone but her! We were just quiietly impressed

BertieBotts · 22/04/2011 10:25

It's funny though, I'm probably the most hippy/AP in the group too, but the other mum who fed until nearly 2 is more of a routine fan. I remember her trying to stretch her baby out for feeds when he was tiny, before anyone else was.

MummyBerryJuice · 22/04/2011 10:32

I'm still feeding DS at 16 months and am 14weeks pregnant with number 2. At the moment it is a bit of a love-hate relationship. I love feeding DS and would be very sad to stop BUT I hate, hate, hate night feeds and he has made it very clear that he is not about to give them up

I have decided to stick my head in the sand and stop worrying about it.

I am in a rather unusual situation to, as although we live in a very rural area with abysmal bf rates my 2 closest (local) friends are still feeding their DD3s one is 18 months old and the other 27 months. Am the only preggers one feeding though!

cardamomginger · 22/04/2011 12:09

FF here. And I think you are all fab and would be (not so) quietly envious of your ability to just feed when and where you need without bottles, formula, hot water, cooling water, another bottle in case dc changes their mind and then fancies something later, etc, etc..... [busmile]

pearlgirl · 22/04/2011 18:10

Just reached a year and am the last one still feeding in one baby group but not in the breastfeeding support group I go to. I am hoping to keep going as long as ds4 wants- we struggled at the start and i am so glad we got it sorted.

Flip

1 2

Swipe left for the next trending thread