Reverse cycling, sleep, weaning... 9.5 month old... help?

[Trillian42]

We've a beautiful 9.5 month old who is a terrific baby but who has been reverse-cycling since what I thought was the 4 month sleep regression. She's nice and chubby and doing fine weight-wise.

She takes a bottle (formula) during the day - approximately from 7am to 7pm, but only drinks about 200ml (6oz) max over the course of the 12 hours, usually in several attempts (same with expressed milk by the way). She takes very little solids - will take virtually nothing until 3pm, and then only a very small amount (2 tablespoons) then and at 7pm. She BFs to sleep and wakes on average every 1.5 hours during the night to feed. We co-sleep (not through choice!) as she only feeds to sleep and otherwise I'd be even more of a zombie than I am now. Her cot is practically unused.

The reason I'm posting this here instead of the Weaning or Sleep forum is because I think a lot of the issues could be because she's stuffed in the morning from feeding all night and has no interest in solids. I think I've caused most of her bad sleep habits and should have nipped feeding to sleep in the bud a lot earlier.

Myself and DH have decided she's old enough to last 3-4 hours without a feed during the night, especially as she can last 6 hours in the morning without showing any interest in a bottle! It'd be great if we could get her more interested in solids, as she's getting close to an age where she should be getting most calories from solids. We also would like our bed back - for at least part of the night!

Our plan is to try and have DH settle her with a bottle any time she wakes from 8-2, then I'd b-feed her, and again from 2-7. She's no interest in a bottle though during the night (we've tried before) and looks on me as the ultimate pacifier.

Have you any suggestions on how we should proceed? Or any comments? Any tips on what worked for you?

hi. what types of solids are you trying to give her. my dd was the same after hitting 5 mo. i started with some baby cereals and used my expressed milk at first as she's used to the taste and slowly moved to formula milk. after doing this she took more formula from a bottle.

also in terms of veg most babies love butternut squash. i mixed this with pear and for the first month of weaning was almost all she ate. heinz banana cereal was really popular too.

at night i know its hard but maybe you will have to let her cry it out a little. i bought a light show for the cot and after about a week it now helps her get to sleep when she's not hungry.

hope this helps

Hi amberscow - thanks for the reply. I was hoping someone would help! I've tried everything! Purees, toast, rice cakes, chunks of banana/veg, jars, homemade...

She loves eating a pear/apple if I peel the skin, but a lot of it ends up on her clothes. She likes toast too, but again, doesn't necessarily swallow it - just chews on it & spits it out. We've had the most success with the Hipp Cottage Pie jar (stage 1) so I've bought some extra jars of that! If she was 6 and a half months I'd be really happy with her progress, but for 9.5 she seems really behind.

It's odd that she only eats in the afternoon/evening though.

does she definately need a feed when she's waking in the night though, as i think i used to feed her just coz it was easier so i made her get into the bad habit. try just rocking her to sleep if she wakes within 5 hours of her last feed.

does she wake even if she's sleeps with you? at 9 and a half months she shouldn't be waking for feeds so much. that way she may take more food during the day.

Perhaps try some simpler foods? Slightly overcooked/soft pasta stars with tomato sauce (not Tommy K - real pomodoro) and soft cheese stirred in? fromage frais with pureed fruit..baby porridge made up with formula and with yoghurt and fruit added...the more dairy you put in her food, the less she needs from a bottle...and the more she eats during the day, the less she will need to feed during the night.

I found sleeping in her own room made a real difference, seemed like hearing me rustling around would wake her, once she was in her own room she moved on to sleeping through without any waking up quite quickly. It took a couple of weeks of listening to the odd night cry and deciding if it was a sleepy grumble and she would take herself back off or a full on cry that would not go away without either a feed or a cuddle.

I'm finding DD, just about to turn 10 months quite tricky at the moment, perhaps they just are at this age? She defo went through a separation anxiety thing at 8/9 months...perhaps that's why yours is waking through the night at the moment?

Good luck!

Getting DH to give a nightfeed worked for us too. Babies change a lot in a few weeks so don't despair if it didn't work last time.

What worked for us...

DD moved into her own room. DH took over and gave DD a bottle in the night at around 2. But he also shh-ed her back to sleep or cuddled when she woke at other points. On nights when she was very unsettled he slept on a futon in her room with her. Shushing in the cot seemed to get her to go from 10-2 fairly quickly, and then from 10-5. The other thing that helped was breastfeeding in the evening but then putting her down before she was fully asleep and shushing and patting her off to sleep in the cot. This was easier for me to do because she stopped falling asleep at the boob in the evening at about 6m and after six weeks of pacing around for an hour with a screaming baby I had to try something else.

DD is nearly 11m now. We dropped the feed at 10 about a month ago. She now sleeps from 7:30/8-6:30/7 most nights. About 1-2 nights a week she wakes and wants a breastfeed or bottle around midnight but that is fine, I am confident that when she wakes and cries now it is because she is hungry and not just because she can't get herself back off to sleep.

The tip above about learning not to respond to every squeak is important too. DH taking over stopped me leaping up every time DD made a noise and she quickly showed us that she could actually go back to sleep without our help if we let her.

The other thing we found was that making sure DD had the opportunity to nap in her cot during the day. Good napping seems to lead to good night-time sleep, so if you can't face having your nights disturbed too much, but can cope with the shushing and patting during the day focus on improving the naps first.

amberscow Any less often than 3 hourly she doesn't need a feed. Her soother and a cuddle work ok, but once it gets to the 3 hour mark, nothing else works.

That said, she slept for 4hours and 45 mins last night without a feed or needing me! I'm attributing it to 2 things - 1. I b-fed her at 5 o'c and again at bedtime at 8o'c so she had more milk in her than usual, and 2. that she took more solids than usual last night.

I've changed mealtimes to be less 'formal' to try and sneak more food into her. I no longer put her in the high chair with a bib... I just try to feed her while she's in my arms or on the floor playing. It seems to be working (fingers crossed). She has no interest in anything with milk in it though burmesegrumbler - porridge, yoghurt, cereals all get refused. I'd feel happier not feeding her during the night if she was taking more during the day though - I know she's not getting much nutrition from her daytime intake of formula/solids.

VeronicaCake - your post gives me hope! DD sleeps in her buggy during the day though as we can't get her to nap without it, but we always make sure she has 2 good naps during the day. That's mostly for our own sanity, as she's a much easier baby when she's rested! DH is going to have to take a couple of days off work for this to work I think - I've become accustomed to sleep deprivation but he needs his sleep.