tips for persevering with breastfeeding, exhausted already!

[yummytummy]

hiya looking for any advice really. my gorgeous new dd is 7 days old and has taken to breastfeeding really well. seems to be latching on well and feeds for between 10-30 mins a time. but i am finding it v tiring as she usually needs a feed every 2-3 hours. is this normal and does it just take time for the gaps to be longer or should i try to feed her for longer each time? am just feeling very drained and cant always nap when she does as have a toddler too. its the night time thats the killer am just exhausted!!

any advice? would really like to bf as long as i can but do find it a struggle at 2am and 3am!!

You sound like you are doing a great job :) It is perfectly normal for a newborn to be feeding every 2/3 hours, in fact it is great. Of course you are tired, you are still recovering from birth! try to relax, neglect the housework (that is what husbands and visitors are for) and when it comes to the toddler, cbeebies is your friend for a few months! You are doing a fine job :)

aw thanks indith! thats reassuring. guess will just keep going like this then!

Sounds like you are doing perfectly.

Can you feed lying down. Maybe ask your health visitor to help you latch on in this position. Even if you don't want to co-sleep, I found it an absolute life saver when I was so tired (and also worrying about falling asleep sitting in a chair).

you might want to try co-sleeping though, ask people on here how to do it safely. I never intended to but ended up finding it the only way of getting any rest and am actually really pleased I did. I didn't with DS1 and nighttimes were so much more of an ordeal.

It really is like this in the beginning and perfectly normal. Whilst everyone is still around (Is your DP on paternity leave) just resign yourself to the fact that you are going to be sitting and feeding for a while.

When your DP goes back to work, try and get him to make you both packed lunch before he goes (toddler not baby ). It makes such a difference being able to just grab food out of the fridge rather than actually make lunch.

Gradually the feeds should get longer and the gaps longer too (although my DS fed constantly in the evening until about 12 weeks).

Indith speaks sense. There really is light at the end of the tunnel. DS is seven weeks now and last night slept from midnight until 5am - it was wonderful. (I'll ignore the fact that at 1.30am I was bathing a four year old as she had thrown up and her hair was caked in it).

Take up all offers of help, no matter how casually made. If someone offers to take your toddler for an hour, get his/her shoes on and out the door before they have a chance to change their mind.

Do not make visitors cups of tea - that is what they are there to do. If you can afford it, get a cleaner. During the night: you feed, DH changes nappies, if he's still on paternity leave that is.

And if family/good friends visit, do not be afraid to go to bed and leave them with your toddler and baby - after all, that's who they are there to see, not you.

I would also actually add don't be afraid to ask someone to take your baby for a walk so you can spend time with your toddler.

I was so preoccupied with looking after the baby whilst everyone entertained DS1, I really missed him!

And I second people making cups of tea etc.

You are doing a brilliant job. My daughter was the same and I found co-sleeping helped a lot in the early days. Make sure you are getting enough to eat and drink as well as that helps. You should have something to drink every time your little one feeds and eat little but often throughout the day. Don't feel bad about snacking at night either. You need to fuel yourself and your baby. Keep it up, it will get better.

Yes to the taking the baby out. DD and I went to the cinema last weekend, it was lovely - a "girly afternoon" as she called it. DH and DS stayed home. :)

thanks, loads of great advice here. dh has been really great and does all the nappies and hands baby over from the moses for feeds etc. he has also been really gd at dealing with house jobs and ds. am dreading when he goes back to work next week! but plan is to get mum or mum in law to come if i need them.

i know what u mean about missing ds though. how can i spend more time with him too while feeding? he seems to be getting more clingy with his dad now as i am busy with baby and didnt want to kiss me gdnite yesterday

will def try cosleeping though. also will eat at night, was feeling bad about being hungry at night and eating, but i guess will worry about weight loss later!

thanks for all the tips!

Do you have a sling? I used to stick dd in a pouch when she was tiny so when she crashed out after a feed I could shove her round to my side and she'd snooze away while I played with ds. Also don't forget that you and the baby will get much more efficient at feeding, with a bit of practice you can feed with one hand while running around waving toy trains with the other .

What Indith says - slings are wonderful. We still use ours for our 18 weeks old DS - we face him outwards when he's awake and alert (yours is obviously too young for this yet) and inwards when we're out walking and he needs to sleep. It was fabulous for shopping in crowds at Christmas and a great help when i needed to get on with things around the house.

When the little one gets more established feeding you will be able to express a bottle for DH to give whilst you play with DS.