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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

breastfeeding wrap/shawls

20 replies

websticks · 10/03/2011 13:41

I have a 9 week old breastfed baby, breastfeeding is going really well. however i hate feeding in public, i have massive boobs and find it really hard to feed discreetly. Wondered if anyone could recommend a Wrap/shawl? I have had a quick look on the internet but seens to be lots of types and they are not cheap so dont want to choose the wrong one.
Would be grateful for anyones opinion thankyou

OP posts:

hopingforanother · 10/03/2011 14:45

Websticks, mine are on the larger side too, it does make things tricky. I tried draping a muslin or scarf and found it was an utter faff - not sure if a shawl might be just as bad? I haven't actually tried one, but wondered: Have you tried a double top approach? A vest underneath (a size up) and a loose- ish top or jumper over it? Then you can fiddle about unhooking your bra and getting boob in to an uncovered state with top layer still down. Then get LO on to your lap and in position before pulling top layer just high enough. I let the top layer drape at the side and just touch DS's nose....

Sorry that doesn't exactly answer your q but maybe useful....

Original poster

websticks · 10/03/2011 15:10

Thanks for your reply, hadn't thought of that. but will try it sounds like a good idea. It was really putting me off going out as i found it such a struggle to feed him was always waiting till the last min too, by that time he is really hungary and starts fussing which makes it all worse, i find myself getting all hot and bothered.

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hopingforanother · 10/03/2011 16:03

I know exactly what you mean about getting hot and bothered. It's horrible! Ds is a v big long baby too and it took me ages to find a position I could sit in comfortably, but it seems to have sorted itself out... I used to wait til last minute too but if you go for an early ish feed I found there was less noise. Maybe not always the case tho.

Deffo try the two top thing, I gave it a go at home first and got used to any potential pit falls before going public :-)

Also I found it helpful to get a bf friend to hang out with - luckily I already had the friend and she happened to be breastfeeding too, any friend will do tho!

fridgeraiders · 10/03/2011 16:10

I bought a 'breast feeding butterfly' for £25. Basically a bit of shaped cloth so immediately at price.

Used once, when ds windmilled arms around shouting and generally tried to attract as much attention as possible as didn't like having his face covered whilst eating. Never used again. Found bf tops and cheapo muslins were the best bet. I found it was often not what i was wearing but where i was in relation to other people. Sitting at the back of cafe = not embarrassed. Sitting directly opposite trying to eat lunch with one hand = a bit more embarrassing.

stinkyfluffycat · 10/03/2011 16:12

I used to tuck the corner of a muslin under my bra strap, spread it out so it covered the boob, get boob out under it and then lift it quickly to attach baby to boob. Not glam but it is cheap..

Original poster

websticks · 10/03/2011 17:12

Thanks fridgeraider, thats the one i was looking at but £25 does seem alot for a piece of material. So wont get that one then. I do have a breast feeding top the type with the hole and another layer over it(hope you understand what i mean) but find the hole is not in the correct place for my nipple and when i pull it, it ends up showing half my boob as its a v neck shape and low ish cut.

Stinkyfluffycat that sounds good will try that too thanks

Hoping for another,wish i had some breast feeding friends unfortunatly all my friend children are older now, was hoping to make some new ones at baby massage, babygroups etc but dont seem to go out much due to feeding issue.

Thanks for all your ideas will have a practise at them at home first and brave it and go out tomorrow

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japhrimel · 10/03/2011 17:28

Boob tops (I get them new on ebay) are great for big boobs IMO - they have a double layer over the boobs that's really simple. V-necked nursing layers often don't fit big boobs well IMO and can dig in when feeding - I got a blocked duct from one top!Vests and a loose/stretchy top work well too. If you wear a cardi or open shirt on top of either option, it gives side coverage.

I used a lightweight scarf to cover DD when latching on/off before I got confident enough. It was far less hassle and far less obvious than a nursing cover.

hopingforanother · 10/03/2011 18:32

It's hard getting started, I was so stressed out the first time but it has got easier the more I've done it. Maybe baby massage could be a good place to find some other bfers. Have you got a dp/dh/ best friend to have coffee with on a Saturday?

I've found shopping centres and coffee shops have been my friend too!

TittyBojangles · 10/03/2011 19:50

Is there a bf group near you, then you can kill 2 birds with one stone... make some bf friends AND get a chance to practice feeding in 'public' without feeling too self concious about it.

Original poster

websticks · 10/03/2011 21:40

Yes have got a dp but only ever been out somewhere with a feeding room, but good idea may try that on saturday as probably would feel calmer if he was there and he could tell me if i was flashing to the nation:)

Went to breastfeeding group when he was 4 weeks old there were only 3 of us there and the other 2 women ran the group, i did feed him there but felt very self conscious.

Been trying the different ideas above tonight and feel much more confident thanks everyone

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Pootles2010 · 10/03/2011 21:47

Maybe try group again? Ours is great, but some weeks what with one thing and another no one goes, then next week 10 do.

I bought a shawl for feeding, but didn't work. May I ask what position you feed him in? I always found it easier to do crossover ( i think its called) where if he was on left boob, he lies on right arm with right hand holding head, and left hand sort of holding boob - meant i had both hands near the boob, so my left hand could hold my top around his head if that makes any sense at all?

hopingforanother · 10/03/2011 21:58

Dh stood in front of me while I sorted myself and Ds out the first time. I was so nervous when Ds was really small and I hadn't figured out the two top cover up strategy - but now I feel like feeding my baby really is a legitimate activity to be doing in cafe Nero and I don't think anyone has really paid us any attention, tho I have had a couple of smiles from other women.

It's such an advantage to be able to feed out and about- hope it goes well- let us know how you get on :-)

hopingforanother · 10/03/2011 22:01

Also I made myself sit in the same room as any guests at our house to feed - public practice but in my own sitting room!

NonnoMum · 10/03/2011 22:06

You will find some people on MN (and some MWs and HVs too) who are really against covering up when BFing as they think we should all just whop 'em out at any time to feed a hungry baby.

Whilst this is great in theory, I found it a bit trickier in practise as a first time mum with huge leaky boobs, and a baby who was fond of "latching" off and taking a look around the room just when I was spurtiest...

So I found one of these really useful. You can get them on ebay and amazon too. It's the hooped neckline that i found most useful so that you could keep eye contact with the baby. Good luck.

Original poster

websticks · 10/03/2011 22:11

At home i use a v pillow to feed him, I think this is the problem when out i sort of panic and just get him on anyway i can. i need to practice. He is a big baby too so is heavy to hold in some positions, He was weighed yesterday and was 18lbs and is 9 weeks and 2 days old he is very long too 65 cm. but because he is a new ish baby he is floppy if you understand what i mean, so i have to completly support him. Will go to breastfeeding group again on tue and try out some of the ideas above. Will post how it goes thanks everyone

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hopingforanother · 11/03/2011 12:35

Cor he sounds like a lovely little chunk! :-) Ds is big too and I know what you're talking about- proportions of a 6mo, body stability of their actual age! I made sure I had a bulky blanket with me to fold in to some kind of cushion. I posted about the prob at the time- there were quite a few ideas on how to support LO - one of them was a thrupenny bits travel cushion - I planned to order one, but didn't get round to it. Maybe worth a look...

I've found the double top thing helps with the panic, get yourself sorted, get LO on lap and comfy, then lift top layer... And easier if you're ahead of the game and a little early for when you expect hunger iyswim.

RibenaBerry · 11/03/2011 13:00

I'm another big fan of the 'vest under top' approach.

If you're feeling self-conscious, in some ways a big 'tie round the neck' type feeding shawl can make it worse, as everyone is drawn to look at it. Also, if your baby is anything like mine were, very quickly they learn how to try and pull out of it to look round (never tried a shawl, but did use a muslin, etc), or refuse to feed with their head covered up.

Cheapo vest from New Look with stretchy straps. Pull down under boob and unclip. Your tummy is covered, your other boob is covered, and you can just hitch your top up to just above the nipple.

gastrognome · 11/03/2011 13:35

Hello,
I go for the vest plus top, pull one up one down approach too. Same colour if poss for maximum discretion. Add a coat or loose cardigan to conceal any exposure at the sides and it's virtually impossible for anyone to see any bare boob at all, even if baby pops off or starts thrashing around (as mine often does).

Loopymumsy · 11/03/2011 14:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

websticks · 13/03/2011 18:56

Just a quick update, thanks to everyone for the ideas. DP and i went into town today i needed some new nursing bra's, and we went for a coffee and i feed ds in the coffee shop, Wore 2 tops and stayed calm and it all worked out well. We had a lovely time and i have gained confidence now to feed in public. Off to breastfeeding support group on tue and will try again there.

Thanks again everyone

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