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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

co-sleeping, natural term breastfeeders - what did you do when next dc came along?

17 replies

DirgeInVegas · 23/02/2011 11:38

I have just found out that I am pregnant and am very excited.

We co-sleeping with DD who is 2 and still feeds at least once at night. I plan to co-sleeping with the next baby but am worried about feeding two at night, new dc waking DD and generally being more exhausted than I was when DD was born.

I can honestly say that the fear of tiredness is scaring more than birth.

Does anyone have any experience of this? I'd be really interested to hear your stories.

OP posts:

WoTmania · 23/02/2011 13:28

Congratulations

I've been BF and cosleeping twice when I got pregnant with the next baby.
I've now been tandem nursing for two years. DS1 went into a cot and his own room but still ame through loads. DS2 night-weaned himself when I was 3-4 months pg with DD and carried on cosleeping til we moved house (he was 18 months) and then went in with DS2.
They were both stil frequent nocturnal visitors and we playe d alot of 'musical beds' depending on who it was and stuff. Often DH would go and get them back to sleep in their bed - he's go to sleep too - once DD was born, or they would just get in with us and go back to sleep.
Really we just did whatever necessary to make sure everyone got the sleep. Don't be too rigid about who sleeps where would be my advice.
Sorry this is a bit convoluted. Best of luck :)

EauRouge · 23/02/2011 13:46

Congrats! I am (over)due with DC2 any day now, still BF and co-sleeping with DD, 2.4yo. We did try moving her to her own room but she was waking up loads and I needed the sleep! We'll try again another time when she's ready. DH sleeps in a separate room due to his snoring like a freight train so we will have the space to get DD, DC2 and me all in one bed, we also have a sidecar cot so loads of room. DD was night-weaned just before I got pregnant but she still wakes up a couple of times in the night

I'll be tandem feeding too, I am a bit nervous because DD still wants BF so many times a day and I don't know if I'll be able to eat enough cake to keep up! I suppose time will tell on that one....

This is a brilliant book about tandem BF.

Original poster

DirgeInVegas · 23/02/2011 13:48

Thanks WoTmania - wow, your ds nightweaned. I can't imagine DD nightweaning to be honest. She rather give it up in the day I think.

She's also not very good at falling asleep with DH, preferring to feed to sleep. I don't really want to change that, well - not for her but I would quite like it if she fell asleep without feeding.

How did you find feeding two at night?

OP posts:

wonderstuff · 23/02/2011 13:51

Congratulations!
Doesn't sound like what you want to do but dd aged 2 at the time briefly went off my milk when I got pregnant and my boobs were sore so I weaned her, was not at all traumatic she was ready imo.
We also moved her into her room - we started off with having her bed in our room and then we made a big fuss of her lovely new room - took her out to buy new things for it and again, not at all traumatic I was expecting her to be distraught but she was quite happy. I like to think that the extended co-sleeping and breastfeeding made her secure enough to make the tansition with out distress.

mawbroon · 23/02/2011 13:57

Our age gap is much bigger and ds1 was night weaned by the time i got pg with ds2 (or rather I got pg only once ds1 night weaned), but I would echo what the others have said about finding out the best arrangement that works for the whole family.

ds1 had been in his own room, but still woke on average maybe every other night, so i would go through and sleep with him til morning. But, i broke my ankle at 32 weeks so best solution was to swap ds1 and dh and have ds1 with me all night.

When ds2 was born, it would have been completely the wrong time to kick ds1 out back to his own bed, so he slept with me and ds2 for around 4 months IIRC.

I can honestly say that I don't think ds1 has ever been woken by ds2. I was able to get them both off to sleep at the same time until a couple of months ago when the carrying on at bedtime got a bit too distracting for them both. Saying that, if I lie in between them both, it is perfectly possible for them to both drop off, but the trouble is that I usually drop off too!!

WoTmania · 23/02/2011 14:12

DirgeinVegas - he night-weaned :) DD was 2 yesterday and still cosleeps and nurses a lot at night. Dh mainly sleeps on the sofa-bed because she is such a fidget

WoTmania · 23/02/2011 14:17

Oh and I didn't end up nursing two at night.
Another thing I've remembered is that we were given a cot bed and we put that up against our bed on DH's side so that The boys could sleep on that. This was the theory, never worked those as DS1 likes close contact all the blimmin' time.

Original poster

DirgeInVegas · 23/02/2011 14:38

Ok, so the overwhelming answer is that it probably depends on our situation. We could think about trying DD in her own bed. I don't have a problem with feeding her or her continuing to cosleep as long as don't end up awake half the night feeding two!

I am pleased to notice that none of you have said "It was hell, worst thing I ever did, start CC now"

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StealthPolarBear · 23/02/2011 14:45

Congratulations!
I night weaned DS when pg - it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. Wasn't co sleeping at that age. DS was 19m when I got pg, think I probably stopped feeding at night at around 2 - which coincided with him starting to shakily sleep through.
One big thing for me was to stop feeding him to sleep too, and that was EASY despite the fact he had always had to be fed to sleep before (unless he happened to be int he car). What I would do is feed him as normal, then when I felt he'd had enough, say I needed teh toilet (which usually was the truth). I expected tears and tantrums, what I got was an understanding little boy who let me go and then was almost asleep when I came back!
If you can do that, do!

When DD was tiny, I would wait until she was asleep before giving DS his bedtime feed. As she got older, she wasn't always asleep at the right time, so I used to have to hand her to DH for a cuddle while I fed DS. It broke my heart hearing her cry but it was never for very long, and then by about 6/7 months she was used to it and used to get in a particular comfy position for her daddy cuddle :) Now she's 17 months I only have to whisper "daddy cuddle" to her while she's having her bedtime feed and she runs off to find him :)

Original poster

DirgeInVegas · 23/02/2011 15:11

Thats lovely Stealth. DD has actually, on a handful of occasions, just rolled over and settled herself to sleep rather than falling asleep mid-feed.

I will give the going-to-the-loo trick a try.

I just don't want to cause her any distress but I also don't want to wear myself into the ground. My overwhelming memory of DD's early days was crying with tiredness and although I expect to be tired, I'd like to be able to function.

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MummyBerryJuice · 23/02/2011 15:23

Dirge 'Hi'

I am in exactly the same position and very nervous. DS is still very little though (14 months) and DC 2 is due in October. He still feeds loads at night, is fed to sleep for naps (unless in car) and at bedtime and although he will sleep for an hour or so in his cot in the evenings will not settle back there after waking. I'm not entirely sure what we are going to do about it but lam currently just taking it as it comes.

PS: Have you found your nipples are really tender?

Original poster

DirgeInVegas · 23/02/2011 15:28

I actually haven't yet MummyBerryJuice but I am only 4 weeks today

I'll be looking to you for tips then Mummy as my dc is due in November. You'll be an expert by then

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MummyBerryJuice · 23/02/2011 16:14

LOL. I'm only 6 weeks (by guestimation - only had one period since DS was born in December so by dates am about 9 weeks but conception indicator last week suggested 3+ weeks).

Will have to wait for the dating scan to know for sure.

Mumbybumby · 23/02/2011 16:25

I was worried about this too but the problem never arose.

DD self weaned when I was about 3-4 months pg. She was about 18 mos :(
We then bought her her own (double!) bed at 20 months old so we could cuddle her at bedtime and in the middle of the night (and because she sleeps like a starfish!) and she settled straight away.
DS was born when she was 23 months old and we have a bedside cot for him and DD generally joins us in bed at 5am for a big family cuddle! The first night DS came home was a nightmare as they both kept wailing and waking each other up and I was worried it would go on like that but luckily it settled from the second night onwards! :)

Original poster

DirgeInVegas · 23/02/2011 16:25

Oh wow, for a minute there I read that you'd given birth in Dec-10 and thought - blimey, this woman is hardcore! Then remembered your giving your DSs age.

When did you senstivity start? I wonder if I should fret that I don't have that?

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MummyBerryJuice · 23/02/2011 16:47

Not everyone gets it apparently. It started properly on about Monday so about 5.5 weeks. I don't mind it so much during the day cause I can distract myself but it is horrible at night. Unfortunately DS howls if I don't give him boob!

Original poster

DirgeInVegas · 25/02/2011 20:28

I have tried telling DD that milkies has gone to sleep when she wakes at night now. It works maybe 10% of the time and the rest is tears.

OP posts:

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