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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

Would a 10 month old self wean?

15 replies

georginars · 14/10/2005 19:50

DD is 10 months and has, for the last 2 and half days, refused to breastfeed - she just screams and basically won't have anythihng to do with it at all. I have been feeding her 2/3 times a day but she usually had a cup of formula in the afternoon as we're often out and she wouldn't breastfeed in public! (She never would take bottles). She does have a tooth coming and is getting over a cold, but she fed all through the cold and I don't think the tooth is actually bothering her today.
So, is it possible she's just self-weaning? If so, I am so upset, I'm not ready to stop, have been crying yesterday and today about it. Do babies really self wean this young - has anyone else's done this? I'm taking it quite hard - is that usual? I feel it's the end of realy babyhood, especially as today she's started standing alone.

OP posts:

NotQuiteCockney · 14/10/2005 19:56

I don't think babies tend to self-wean this young. At least that's what Kellymom say. Oh, here's the full link.

I'd keep offering.

Beanfrog · 15/10/2005 09:09

It could be what they call a nursing strike. It should only last a day or two. Have you eaten anything particularly spicy?
My ds refused to feed when he had ear ache, it must have hurt to much. I'd also try and check that there isn't a problem in your daughter's mouth, apart from teething, such as cuts or thrush. Hopefully you'll get back on track soon!

oh, I read somewhere, that using spray deodorant can put babiess off feeding as it can get on yor boobs and it tastes horrible and dries out their mouths. Who knows?

Original poster

georginars · 15/10/2005 09:19

Still refusing to feed - can't think of anything I've done dofferently. Now hasn't fed from me since Wednesday morning. Harumph

OP posts:

frannykenstein · 15/10/2005 09:27

It is absolutely typical for babies of this age to have a nursing strike - ds did and is still going strong now age 2.5. I think developmentally there is so much going on and they are just starting to assert their independence. Whenever I hear of this happening it is in babies of 9, 10 or 11 months old.

The advice I was given at the time by LLL, which did work after a few days, was: Try feeding when she is feeling sleepy, or halfway through a nap. Lie down together to feed, or use a sling and walk about, rocking her. Increase the amount of skin to skin contact, have baths together and try feeding in the bath. Consider if you have been over-busy lately and not spending enough time just being together. Give lots of positive attention and try to relax yourself.

I also felt quite upset. I am sure it is natural to feel that way, particularly because you are suddenly not getting those helpful breastfeeding hormones any more. Try to express to keep up your supply and avoid blockages, if you are comfortable doing that. If it continues, I would check for ear infections, as they do make feeding very painful and can often come at the end of a cold. Otherwise just persevere and hopefully all will be well in a week or two.

frannykenstein · 15/10/2005 09:28

Ring your local La Leche League leader Georgina - they will give you a lot of support and also more expert advice than we can on here. I'll go and find the number for you....

frannykenstein · 15/10/2005 09:30

0845 120 2918. You will be put through to a local woman who has breastfed her own children and has tons of breastfeeding information to hand. Hope it works out for you, let us know what happens.

lockets · 15/10/2005 09:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

moondog · 15/10/2005 10:32

My ds did too georginars,despite me wanting to carry on for much longer.
I did all the things recommended here,but he would take a half hearted suck then look up ,smile at me and wriggle away.
He ate an awful lot from the time food was first introduced so I think he just didn't need it (unlike his sister who b/fed for 30 months!)

Original poster

georginars · 15/10/2005 10:35

oh dear, we haven't spent as much time together, have been out playing in shows a lot in the evening and DH has been putting her to bed. Now feel even more guilty!
Have tried while she's sleepy or during a nap - no go. Also we've been having baths together as I was missing bed time. Can't use a sling - she weighs far too much and I've got a bad back already. I will keep trying, but am also thinking that as I am trying to get more work, and that will be in the evenings, maybe I'll reconcile myself to giving up. Really not sure about it at all, for some reason would feel guilty, even thought I've fed her for this long. . I think it's the guilt that will bother me

OP posts:

Original poster

georginars · 15/10/2005 10:37

Hmm, could I mention 'guilt' enought? Maybe that's my problem! I think it's the fact that she doesn't just refuse, she really cries if I even put her near the breast. Maybe I'll take her to the doctor and check her ears, although the only time she cries is when I try to breastfeed her.

OP posts:

moondog · 15/10/2005 10:38

georg,you've done a fantastic job..fed a lot longer than the vast majority of women.
Believe me,if she wanted it she would still be pawing at your shirt and sniffing it out! (I know,I had this for years!!)

Keep offering for a few more days,and if that is the end of it so be it.
Congratulate yourself on a job next done and look forward to the next stage which will be....running around the house and wrecking everything.

Aaaargggh!!!

Annner · 15/10/2005 10:41

I could have written your post: we had a three-day strike at about 9.5 months, and then she stopped completely at 10 months. I was (and am still) gutted.

Like Moondog, I think that she just wanted the lumpy stuff more.

She had never really drunk anything else apart from the odd sip of water, so I had to work up to sensible quantities of milk from her doidy cup.

I'm still expressing twice a day, and she gets through about 9oz a day of a half boob, half cows milk mixture. She has always spat formula out, and as she is now 11 months, I couldn't be faffed getting her to like something that I would be getting her off again a month later. We make sure that she gets lots of calcium rich food, and she troughs greek yoghurt by the bucket load.

She's still growing nicely, and is very happy. I did all of the skin to skin, bathing, quality time stuff, but nada. Do give all of those suggestions a try, as they worked for us once, but I think that my little girl was beginning to feel that there was more to do in the day.

Good luck!
Annner

Original poster

georginars · 15/10/2005 11:03

thanks for all kind messages! Will keep trying and see how it goes.

OP posts:

frannykenstein · 15/10/2005 12:20

I think if it is just guilt that's the problem, you should stop worrying (so easy to say!). But from your initial post I got the feeling you were looking forward to many more happy months of breastfeeding, in which case I would fight for it. Breastfeeding is so useful during the toddler stage, I don't know what I would have done without it. If you can see yourself at all happily breastfeeding a little walking person then there are so many benefits, I would highly recommend it.

I think not having had so much time for her is a classic symptom - ds timed his strike just before Christmas when I was running around like a fool, and he had also just had a cold. I can't remember exactly what cracked it for us, but I am so glad I stuck it out, and you would never believe the same boy had ever refused his milkies if you could see him now, he is the most passionate fan of breastfeeding ever.

Original poster

georginars · 18/10/2005 15:51

An update, we've given up completely now but I am getting used to the idea and DD seems very happy. I guess 10 months is better than nothing, I just wanted to at least get to a year! never mind, it seems that this has happened naturally and I'm not so desperate to continue that I can face digging out the pump again (she continued to absolutely refuse the breast, very forcibly - she's quite a determined baby). On the plus side, seem to already have much more energy and feel quite chirpy.

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