i think it's nipple confusion

[MacMomo]

thanks for the advice from my earlier thread. I think dd has got nipple confusion from my using nipple shields (on bleeding nipples) before I sorted out the latch. Also, dh was giving her one bottle a day and although he was supposed to do it from a cup, it was all too difficult and he admitted he used the bottle (with a slow flow teat). This would explain why she is coming at the nipple with her lips pursed and refuses to open wide for a latch.

Now a big problem: she latches poorly due to half open mouth. If I take her off and try to latch properly she screams for ages and refuses to latch any differently next time. This goes on. So I let her feed with a poor latch, which is causing very painful nipples again. But if I don't let her latch - what? We will be on bottles permanently.

Are you waiting for her to open her mouth before latching?

It's very frustrating - we're struggling a bit atm too.

Make sure your oh is making her latch properly on the bottle, not just shoving the teat into a barely open mouth.

Yes, waiting and waiting - while she roots and gets upset or even gives up and goes to sleep again. She also rubs her face in the nipple. Her hands get in the way (they always did), but if I swaddle them away she screams and screams which is new, she used to cry for a second and then forget them.

All bottles removed from use. I am not happy about the bottle use as I think it was dh being lazy.

I will carry on trying to latch her properly until my nipples give out. Then we'll have to reassess. I just wondered if there were any other ways of teaching her to open her mouth again. So far, it has been 4 days since she last really latched with a properly open mouth.

Have you tried biological nurturing positions with her?

Yes, lots. She will latch but poorly and after a lot of upset. She used to open just fine and the latch problems were because of my inexperience and her slight tongue tie/deep palate. Now she's always coming at it with her lips out and rounded - for a bottle! Even after ages and ages of waiting and encouraging or even ignoring, all she does is pout for a bottle and then cry.

She also pulls off after half a feed, possibly I think because the milk isn't coming out fast enough at that point - because she's latched poorly every time. It's so frustrating because it's a new problem after we've solved the earlier ones! She is perfectly capable of opening wide, she just won't.

She's sleeping a lot more than before, so I'm worried she's not getting enough and I'm having to wake her up for feeds which I didn't used to have to do. She is still filling nappies, though.

We had this recently with DS2. He wouldn't latch on AT ALL after having bottles for a couple of days post surgery. We got him feeding again but I had to stop giving him bottles for a while until he was fully established back on the breast.

Although cup feeding is slow and frustrating, that's sort of the point of it- she has to work a bit harder so it doesn't become the easier option (like bottles did in our case)
If she was latching fine the one bottle a day wouldn't matter. As things stand, would DH consider going back to cup/ syringe feeds for the sake of your poor nipples?

I also agree that you should try not latching her on at all until she's really opening wide. Not easy in practise with a hungry, frustrated baby I know but worth it in the long run.

Also, do you offer feeds before she asks? If you can catch her before she's ravenous it may be easier to get her to latch properly. I was offering DS feeds at least every hour during the day until he was feeding well.

Sorry if this has been done before, I haven't seen your other thread.