Possibly a couple of daft questions about breastfeeding 10 day old DS

[LotteryWinnersOnAcid]

DS is 10 days old and I am breastfeeding during the day and most of the night, and expressing enough for DH to give a bottle or two during the night. I am alternating between breasts for the feeds and the expressing, eg:

Right feed - Left express - Right feed - Left feed - Right feed - Left express - Right feed and so on (but no particular pattern as to when I will express, it's twice a day at the moment)

My left breast has a bit of a sore nipple from a dodgy starting latch which is why I am favouring expressing from this breast at the moment.

My question is, will the pattern I am using keep my boobs 'balanced' in that one (theoretically) shouldn't produce more than the other?

Also, will giving him a bottle or two at night affect his latch? I am having to do this as he is feeding every hour at night at the moment and I literally don't sleep unless DP takes a couple of the feeds by bottle. Latch feels maybe more uncomfortable in that I can feel his tongue against my nipple (I think?!) when I feed now but it's early days - is this a problem?

Advice appreciated, thank you!

I am still struggling with bf so not an expert but can tell you what happened to me (Dc1 is 4.5 weeks).

DD wouldn't latch on left, I didn't really deal with this until week 2 and by then it was half the size of right one. I am taking supplements and expressing from it every 1.5 hrs now to try to get it to work but little improvement, so you're right to focus on making sure your left is expressed very often.

I was advised to get DD to sip from cup/bottle lid for first few weeks to avoid teat causing nipple confusion.

HTH

I would say 10 days is very early to start expressing and introducing a bottle. Might be better to just breastfeed until your supply is properly established? I think you do risk his latch getting lazy, and also him coming to prefer the ease of a bottle by giving them so frequently.

Can you sleep when the baby does during the day?

hello - just about to go to bed but thought I would respond to you.
Well done and congrats!
I agree that this is a bit too early to introduce a bottle. Not that it would necessarily affect the latch but - more importantly - it could affect your supply. The supply is based on demand so if you are not feeding you will produce less milk - especially so at night, when production is high. It really is not a good idea to let someone else feed at night - sorry! I know how tempting this must be. Wait until the supply has settled down a little.
IMO and IME it doesn't matter if one breast is producing more than another - natural variation takes place. The key is to keep feeding, keep cuddling (lots of skin to skin) and your supply will soon be resilient.
hth

I have done a lot of expressing in my BF career, but think your maybe pushing it a bit too soon.

I would hold off until he was at least 3 weeks and then only do it once a day until after the 6 week growth spurt.

A problem can be that it leads to oversupply issues which can impact feeding later. If you do want to express, for now hold off and then later express to order only. No stocking up.

If you want to ensure DC will take a bottle, then every few days should suffice.

A danger of giving a bottle in the night is that they'll last longer before they're fed but middle of the night feeds are great for supply.

I know it's hard because you need sleep. Make sure you do no jobs, that's what DH is for. Also co-sleeping and learning to feed lying down is great. Additionally can you get someone to help in the day where they just bring baby to you when they need to feed.

That expressing time could be sleeping time

I was advised by the HV to do some expressing pretty early on to build up my supply due to a dodgy latch, and people on here said it was too early. That may have been right but in the long run it worked ok - don't forget though that it's the night feeds that will help you establish your supply. It was also a nuisance and, as also said here, that's time when you could be sleeping, right there!

This bit: "Latch feels maybe more uncomfortable in that I can feel his tongue against my nipple (I think?!) when I feed now" sounded a bt worrying to me - I felt the same and my latch was not right at the time and got worse. Does yur nipple come out of your LO's mouth in a shape like a lipstick top, with white pressure marks? If so, you need to see a bf counsellor who can check your latch in RL and give advice. Heck, it might well be worth doing it anyway - I saw people several times and it went from being not a good latch to an okay to a better to a much better one, with small improvements after each visit. I reckon I couldn't remember more than one thing to do differently each time!

Agree with it being a bit early to express/give a bottle.

Also, sorry but, at 10 days you will be tired, it's part of it :)

What i would suggest is to try holding baby in the same position as you do for right-hand side feeding for the left, ie the rugby ball hold under your left arm? he might be better at latching on that way round and you might be better at holding him in position.

Keep going, you're doing well :)

Blimey....this is one complicated feeding regime :) .

Lottery - how about making life a bit simpler and certainly no more tiring?

Forget the expressing - really, forget it :) All that messing about with pumps and bottles and teats and keeping them clean and pouring the milk in.....not necessary, honestly. And as others have said, the bottles extend the gaps between breastfeeds, which is not good for your supply.

Just feed your baby according to his needs, and feed him in bed to help you and him sleep better. Frequent feeds are normal with a young baby.

There are a million ways your DP can help during these early days.

Hope you can relax and let things sort themselves out.

I'd agree with it being early to express without risking issues, but if you need to, you need to. I expressed from day 1 as DD had a stay in SCBU and we've had lots of latch issues to contend with and at 7wo my supply is only starting to settle down to when she wants it.

If you are going to give a bottle, make sure it's a slow-flow teat and make sure baby has to latch like they would with a breast. That means using a wide necked bottle and only giving the teat when baby's mouth is really wide open with the tongue down. Also take breaks when giving a bottle so it's not being guzzled in one go.

Your LO may settle better if your OH tries at night. At this age, Mum means comfort as well as food, so baby will nurse for lots of reasons. But it's very early days.

Thanks for all the responses, I have been concerned about it being too early to introduce the bottle etc and I know tiredness is part and parcel of these early stages but if it isn't every hour it is more frequent, ie, if I put my boob away he just cries until I chuck it in his mouth again and then will do a couple of big sucks then just keep my nipple in his mouth, eyes wide open just looking about as though it is for comfort only. Which I know is fine, and maybe I am a terrible mummy or just completely unprepared, but I literally don't feel as though I can cope without any sleep. This morning we were awake until 5.30am - the only reason I got any sleep is because I asked my DP to give him a bit of formula, of which he had 1oz (DP had previously given him a 2oz bottle of breastmilk at 3.30am and I had been breastfeeding on all other feeds). I do feel like shit for it but it settled him, he then woke for a feed at 8.15 and then again at 11am, which I did both of on boob.

God sorry I am rambling/ranting. I just never expected it to be this hard and I feel selfish for not being able to stay awake and feel positive etc etc. They say breastfeeding is easy, cheap, convenient, etc, and no, it's not! I know it is the best thing for him and he is gaining weight well so I want to persevere, it just seems so hard.

We are aiming to attend our local breastfeeding peer group tomorrow at 10am, I only hope I am able to be awake to go to it!

comix, there are no white marks on the nipple but it is definitely a bit flatter on one side. I thought this was a bad sign. This didn't happen initially. I will speak to someone about it tomorrow hopefully. Thanks for the heads up.

Swimming, he won't latch in the rugby hold, he literally won't do it! It's frustrating as I read that this position forces a wide latch but he hates it. We were lying tummy to tummy to feed but that feels uncomfortable for me now and I just can't get into a position where the rest of my boob isn't covering his nose and I am worried about his breathing. The only other position we do is cross cradle which mostly works except for now this new latch issue probably due to bottle. I am getting better at making sure he is sufficiently tilted so that there is a wide gap between nose and boob!

japh, DP has been ensuring baby is latching onto the bottle as he would breast as much as possible, thanks for that comment, it means we are attempting to do it right at least, even if what we are doing isn't right!

I really hope to go back to exclusively breastfeeding him, I am trying to get my stamina up by napping in the day but it is so hard because it seems however much I nap during the day I am always completely exhausted at night. :(

Anyway, will hopefully report back with better news soon. Thanks again for all the comments, really useful. x

Everything is hard at 10 days, but it does get better! It seems unimaginable now but in a few weeks breastfeeding will be easy, cheap, convenient. Once I got the hang of feeding lying down, about 3-4 weeks in, I barely woke up for night feeds and couldn't tell you in the morning how often ds had fed!

I wonder if adding expressing, bottle feeding, cleaning and sterilising into your day is making things more tiring though? I don't think I'd got out of bed by 10 days, I was half asleep eating cake and watching DVDs all day

Lottery :( :(

Your expectations are way, way higher than reality....your baby is 11 days old and you and he are still learning every day, every hour.

Less than 2 weeks ago he was inside you, and he needs you to be close in order to be soothed with your familiar contact which is what he experienced before birth :)

Bf is convenient - in time. He might have been just as needy of being close if he was formula fed.

Can you work on being able to rest and doze while still having him close to you, feeding frequently as he needs to do at the moment? Of course you need to sleep - this is possible even with your baby doing all this closeness and feeding.

Of course you're not a terrible mummy! The other suggestion you make - completely unprepared - is the right one, I think! I don't think this has much to do with bf, to be honest, but more to do with shock at how overwhelming it can be to care for a newborn.

Your not a crap mum! The first 4 weeks imo are the hardest! My ds would be on the boob pretty much ALL day for the first few weeks its only recently after his 6 weeks growth spurt that he's started having a patter to his feeds

It's easy, cheap and convenient once you are past the really hard stage!

At that early, it's a matter of just surviving each day as best you can.

Does he fall asleep after feeds? If so then you really need to be set up to get back to sleep as quickly as possible. I found it hard to co-sleep in the early weeks because I was so anxious about DD and also because DD couldn't go back to sleep if I was stationary so DH and I took turns walking up and down the stairs with her!

Have you got a futon or can you put your mattress on the floor? That way you can curl up with your baby and know that he can't fall out of bed. Have you got a nice warm dressing gown you can wear to sleep in? That way you can pull a blanket up over the lower half of your body, stay warm and know you won't accidentally smother him? Little things like this may be enough to enable you to actually catch some sleep whilst your baby sleeps. If he needs extra rocking and shushing ask your partner to do this, rather than giving night feeds.

Other tips I've since received from more experienced mums include feed lying down as much as poss because this makes it easier to relax even if you don't sleep and take yourself up to bed with your baby, and books/laptop/TV early in the evening so you can just chill together.

I found I could cope much better if I could top and tail the night. If I got sleep between 10 and 12 and between 6 and 7 then the small hours didn't matter so much. DH took DD for a lot of early morning walks so I could catch up!

This bit will be over really soon. Don't beat yourself up about unrealistic expectations. I don't know anything that can prepare you for the chaos of a newborn.

Sounds fine to me. In my experience NOTHING puts a baby of breastfeeding :)