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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

5 month bf dd2 only feeds lying down in bed - poor neglected dd1, help!

7 replies

petisa · 30/01/2011 22:49

For the last few weeks or so 5 month old dd2 has only wanted to feed lying down, in bed. If I feed her sitting up or in any other room she goes really stiff and arches her back, unlatches, smiles at me, nips my nipple, stares around at everything and is distracted by any noise whatsoever, and whatever little she does drink gives her wind and she always possets. And this is even though she is hungry.

I would normally feed her a lot in bed anyway, night feeds, morning feed, naptime feeds, but I have to get out and about too especially since I have a 2.9 year old dd1 who's at home with me all day. Also, as dd2 won't feed in the same room as her sister because she's far too interested in what dd1 is doing, I have to take her up to the bedroom and leave dd1 with a dvd on, for up to 40 mins at a time, and although she loves watching telly, I feel the poor thing is spending too much time on her own.

I've heard this is a common problem in babies dd2's age.. can anyone who's had this problem tell me how long it lasted? And how did you get your baby to get down to business and feed in public? And will feeds get shorter, as feeds are taking about 20 mins each side (I can hear her drinking for most of this time)? For example in the morning, I have to put Mr Tumble on for dd1, race upstairs and feed dd2 on one side, run down and leave crying rooting dd2 and put Mr Maker on and run upstairs again for another 20 mins to do the other side until dd2 falls asleep. Does this sound normal or what am I doing wrong?!

TIA!

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Pterosaur · 30/01/2011 23:04

All I can offer is sympathy, as my dd2 did this and it drove me crazy. Her generally annoying bfing habits peaked at 5 months, when 3 year-old dd1 and I were under virtual house arrest, and I seem to remember it was all much easier at 6 months.

I fed her until she was 16 months - no problem at all in public after about 6 months when she generally became more relaxed and less clingy. Distraction wasn't her problem - she just seemed to want my exclusive attention.

DD1 watched Thomas the Tank Engine on a continuous loop - doesn't seem to have done her any permanent harm.

petisa · 31/01/2011 20:49

Thanks Pterosaur! I'm clinging on to the hope that it will get better at 6 months, so only a few weeks to go.

I was hoping the feeds get shorter too. Anyone else out there have this kind of problem? When did each feed stop taking 40 mins?!

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thisisyesterday · 31/01/2011 20:51

when mine were going through that phase they just had to feed where I was or just not feed at all tbh!

if they want to feed they will. if they're happier looking around then let them!

petisa · 31/01/2011 21:12

I know thisisyesterday, I do just go out when I want to anyway and try and feed her where I am anyway, but she then has a huge meltdown later when she realises she is starving and exhausted and my nerves can't handle it! Tbh I'm barely coping as it is and I'm a wuss when it comes to screaming and wailing. It's horrible when dd2 is going nuts and I'm trying to give dd1 her dinner and get her ready for bed. MNers who said it was v tough having two at the start were so right!

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BecksSpecks · 06/02/2011 19:26

Petsia it is really reassuring to find out I am not the only one. I am lying in bed feeding as I type! Never had to feed DD1 lying on couch but this is all I seem to do with 3 1/2 month son since he had nasty cold before Christmas. Seemed to scare him from feeding as he couldn't breathe. It's all very well people saying to feed when out or tough but when they won't feed but are FOUL it's horrid. Am taking him to cranial osteopath on Wed to see if she's got any ideas as it's getting me down now. Good luck xx

petisa · 17/02/2011 21:20

Bumping this thread again as I still have this problem and now dd2 is nearly 6 months old. Yesterday she refused feeds from 11am when we left home to visit friends right up until we got back home at 7pm and she could have a feed in bed. I tried her loads of times, in a cafe and lying on my friend's sofa. She realised she was starving on the motorway and screamed all the way home, for a full hour! Needed a stiff Wine after that. I stopped to feed her and everything, but she only had a few gulps, and was pushing herself away from me, then when I carried on driving she resumed screaming.

Can I not go out again until she is eating 3 meals a day? Hmm Confused I can't do that anyway as I have a nearly 3 year old dd to look after. And to top it off she's feeding every 2 hours during the day or more. I can't spend all that time in the bedroom, poor dd1!

Thankfully she sleeps well at night and only feeds twice mostly. Any similar experiences or reassurance?? Will she ever feed in public again?

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snowgum · 01/03/2011 20:12

I have this problem with 3 1/2 mo ds2 and it seems to be getting worse. I have to go out with him (I take him to work) and he just gets increasingly hungry until he is screaming all the way home. Then i put him on the bed and he smiles and giggles.

Does anyone have any ideas about how to coax them out of it?

We are going on a long trip 26 hr flight in a month and i am worried!

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