Bf in the night, can I cut down or not?

[iggypiggy]

Not sure what the answer is but, my 6 month old DD Is currently waking for night feeds every one or two hours through the night, and has been for 6 weeks now... I am v tired..

My question is, can I try to stop some of the night feeds, or should I still be feeding on demand? She is exclusively BF and I have just started weaning onto solids the last couple of days.

She has never slept well, in that she has often had frequent night wakings, but it wasn't always for food, and until 6 weeks ago, she used to have a few bad nights, then a few good ones (eg. Waking every four hours). So I used to catch up on sleep on the good nights, but now am just v tired and just want her to sleep for a three or four hour stretch in the night!

Any advice? Do you think she needs the food or maybe it's just for comfort?

My ds is 5 months and I recently cut down nightfeeds. He went through the 4 month sleep regression thing and was waking every hour or two and needed to feed to get back to sleep, but it wasn't sustainable (for me).

So, I stopped feeding him to sleep at bedtime - DP rocked him instead. I do a dreamfeed at 10.30pm, and decided not to feed him again until 3ish. If he woke in between these times DP rocked him back to sleep.

Probably took a week or so, but now he sleeps from the 10.30pm feed til 3-4am, then again til 6-7am.

i did with my ds when he was 6 months actual 3.5 corrected as he was prem, after my pro bf ds dietician told me it was alright. He then went from dreamfeed at 11 ish to 6 ish after about a week of dropping the night feeds, a couple of months later we dropped the dreamfeed, illness aside he will now sleep 7pm to 6am without feeding and he's 10 months actual 7 ish corrected now

I'm thinking about doing this - ds is 4.5 months and I'm happy to do some night feeds but not every 1-2 hours. moonunit I'm worried if I delay feeds in the night he'll just scream and get so worked up that he won't go back to sleep even when i do feed him. How did you deal with it when he woke before 3?

[sorry for hijack iggypiggy - i'm desperate!]

Well I knew DS wasn't hungry every hour or two at night! A lot of the feeds were just a few minutes suckling to get back to sleep - so the first thing I did was make sure he had another way to get to sleep (DP rocking him at bedtime rather than feeding). Then making sure he had a really good feed at 10.30pm - changing his nappy woke him up enough. We've subsequently made that feed a bottlefeed and he doesn't wake for it now normally, but I don't think it matters whether it's breast or bottle.

There were a couple of nights at first where ds wouldn't settle for ages - up to an hour - but there's a difference between tired protesting grumbles and hunger cries. If the crying escalated and he wouldn't be soothed at all by rocking/cuddling I did feed him, but mostly he would stop crying while being rocked and then protest at being put down. For the first few nights we all got even less sleep than when I'd just fed him all night and I almost cracked, but DP persuaded me to give it a bit longer and within a couple of days it was taking a few minutes for DP to soothe him back to sleep.

His sleep isn't perfect still - last night he woke for a feed at 3am, then woke again about 4 and DP patted him back to sleep. And he still wakes 2 or 3 times between 7pm-10.30pm and needs a cuddle. But I'm getting a 5 hour stretch then a 3 hour stretch at the moment which is a huge improvement on 2 or 3 weeks ago.

Thanks for replies!

She seems to be having a smallish feed each time, and is also doing this in the day (v distractible!) and she used to go longer and just have bigger feeds, so am sure she could, but part of me worries she is needing the extra food as is older/ bigger?!

She is also being v difficult for my husband at the mo and screams until I take her in the night, I assume
because she wants feeding - wether she is hungry or just wants the comfort am not sure... But am really desperate for sleep!

Marzipananimal, much sympathy!

I actively cut out night feeds with my DC3 when he was approx 3 months old (for various reasons which I won't go into here). I think that you can be safe in the knowledge that a 6 month old will remain perfectly healthy if you cut down the night feeds and will manage to compensate and take enough milk during the day.

With my DC3 I woke and fed him at approx 10.30pm. I knew that he would then wake again at around 2am and 5am. I tackled the 2am wake first. I sat up holding and rocking him in my arms while he cried and rooted. It was quite traumatic for both of us but I did not feed him. It was over an hour before he fell back to sleep and I very carefully took him into bed with me without waking him and he slept until around 5am when I fed him. Following night was the same, woke 2am ish, but he fell asleep after about 30 mins and I was able to pop him back into his cot rather than take him into bed, then fed again at the next wake. 3rd night he fell asleep after about 10 mins and after another night or so he didn't even need me to pick him up, just fussed a little around 2am then fell back to sleep and after another couple of nights even that fussing dropped away. I then did the same thing with the approx 5am wake and very soon he was sleeping through. He continued to gain weight with no blips or drops and my milk supply soon adjusted so that I wasn't totally exploding at night.

Good luck. In my experience (like MoonUnitAlpha) the first few nights you will get a lot less sleep than usual but it is worth making the effort as within a relatively short time you will probably see a marked improvement.

My DS is 8 months and EBF. He was fed around 2/3 times during the night until he was 7 months as I always assumed that if he woke up, he needed fed. At 7 months, I decided to gradually stop the night feeds as he wasn't takingas much at night and I got the impression, he just liked the cuddles. Around this same time, I was increasing his solid intake. I should say that he's been a really good eater. The first night I did it, he took a while to go back to sleep but after a some shush, patting, he was fine. I decided that if he became distressed, I would feed but he was actually fine. Kept doing this and have now completely cut out his night feeds. His sleeping has markedly improved as a result. He now sleeps from 8pm ish until about 2am, wakes for a cuddle then down until 7am ish. However, appreciate that every baby is different. Good luck

At 6 onths I would continue night feeds. As solids are only just being established hunger may be a factor. Babies also get more thirsty when solids start. Pleae don't use babyrice as solid food as this has less calories than breastmilk!
It should sort itself out soon.

Oh IggyPiggy you have my sympathy. I could have written your post, and probably would have if I hadn't already started so many threads in this topic in recent months.

I have no advice other than to assure you that you are not alone. For our part, the problems began when I was away with the children, without DH, at my parents for over 3 weeks. It coincided with the 4 month sleep regression/growth spurt and DD has always been difficult anyway. The only way I could get any sleep at all and not go crazy was to have DD in bed with me. She very quickly got used to having me on tap for her all night and I have created a monster!

Since coming back, 6 weeks ago, DD has pretty much refused to sleep in her cot - which, bear in mind, is a bedside cot immediately next to me. She never would go in her cot in the daytime, but now you are lucky to get her in it at all. She has been waking every hour or two in the night for 2 months solid now. I am sometimes managing to resettle her with cuddling/rocking - I, like you, don't believe she is hungry all the time. But other times, in the small hours, I just can't be bothered and it's frankly easier just to feed her and go back to sleep. Her teeth are certainly bothering her as well and I know b/f can act as an analgesic.

But I am now thinking I have to solve this somehow. At the moment DD and I are in the bed and poor DH is consigned to the sofa downstairs. Much of the night I have to physically cuddle her and the quality of any sleep I do get is pretty poor.

The killer fact in my case that is making me desperate is that I am back to full time work in 2 weeks time.

Personally I'd wait until the weaning onto solids is more established, DS2 was genuinely starving in the night before he had solids. He is a great sleeper, it was because he was hungry and digesting BM v quickly! I couldn't see how I could stop the feeds - he'd scream the place down.

Within a week of introducing solids (recommend GF's idea of solids at 6pm after bedtime feed) his sleeping was much better.

By 7 months onto 3 solid meals, including meat at lunchtime and sleeping 10pm-7am, now at 9 months consistently sleeps 6.30pm-7.30am.

Hmm, I missed that part in the OP. In my case DD is usually eating 3 meals a day and I've started introducing meat and fish - she's nearly 7 months. No sign of an improvement though.

Plus she's not that hungry for milk in the morning, or breakfast. I think things have gone a bit wrong somewhere...

I have this problem too, dc3 is 28w and wakes every 3 hours, but is really hungry and goes back to sleep even if i put her down awake. She is not eating solids well at all, she'll suck at a piece of toast or lick the cream cheese off a ricecake but will not eat from a spoon so I'm leaving the night feeds as they are until she's eating properly. If she wakes 2 hours or less after feed I try to rock her to sleep.

gaelicsheep - we have v similar problems! I have had her in bed with me as v desperate for sleep over christmas - and she is now even worse at going in the cot than she was before - and like you it is a bedside one... She seems to want to sleep touching me...

She wakes frequently anyway - but only recently has she wanted feeding every time... last night was typically poor.. in cot asleep at 7.30pm, woke at 8pm and 9pm, settled back to sleep by husband - we went to bed at 9.30pm - she woke at 10pm - and i held her hand back to sleep - then at 10.40pm she woke for food, so i fed her - finally getting her back into the cot at 11pm. she woke at midnight and husband took her - then at 1.15pm, and i fed her again... she woke at 2pm, then 3pm (you get the gist) then eventually i pulled her into bed with us at half five and we slept till 8am. but i hate having her in with me as i sleep badly/ uncomfortably and i worry...

anyway - this has turned into sleep rather than feeding! but in the night she does seem hungry every two hours - which seems so often...

i havent tried baby rice anyway - we are just on mashed vegetables and fruit and finger foods - but we are only a few days in..

am just so tired - gaelicsheep - i so sympathise

How often is she feeding in the day? Can you squeeze more feeds in?

Moonunit, she is also feeding lots in the day... Sort for snacking though... She does a big feed, then two hours later a short one, then two hours later a big one.. Etc. She is only little but gaining weight steadily.

She also feeds every hour from 5pm, which I assumed was because she wants more before bed?

I just wondered if by making her wait a little bit, she might take bigger feeds?

I don't know, I would lean towards feeding more often rather than spacing feeds. Does she take both sides every time? Could you switch back and forward a few times and make each feed bigger that way?

usually - just from one side - except towards bedtime, where she has both sides as she seems very hungry then..

in the night it is always 10 mins from one side. and that is 10 mins of proper glugging... then she drops stright back to sleep.

she only feeds when she is hungry though - if i offer and she isnt hungry, she wont eat... so not sure i can increase in day?

oh gosh i didn't realise this was here - maybe should have a look at these options.

Iggypiggy I have exactly the same problem - but have to go as DD just woken from her (15-minute long!) nap ...

thisis we have 20 min naps... am sure she should sleep longer than that! Hope yours gets better too.

Loo too early for me to say re: weaning, but mine seems a bit like yours at the mo!

Am wondering about moving her to her own room at night... kind of don't want to, but also thinking maybe if she can't smell me/ the milk it may cut down on wake ups?! maybe not...

We've wondered about the own room thing, but she doesn't currently have one as it's still DSH's workshop and needs some serious doing up. And we can't even get ger in her cot in the evening. Last night she didn't settle until 1 am - in bed with me. We have tried and tried putting her down in the cot but she wakes up and works herself into hysterics no matter what we try to make her stay there. Then that disturbs DS and we have two of them to deal with.

What I need to do is take her to bed with me when she first falls asleep but the time she's asleep in the evening is the only time I can MN get anything done or relax. I still dread the nights as well so I don't want to lengthen them for myself, plus my sleep is just shot to pieces. I'm not sure I could sleep even if she did, no matter how tired I am.

I had quite a bad night too btw. In bed at 1 am, fed her, then I had to cuddle her all night and even then she woke 3 more times before the alarm went off at 7. I just don't feel like I sleep at all these days, no more than superficial napping.

Oh, and mine's a power napper too, unless someone is holding her.

Yes, my sleep all messed up too... Seems unfair on top of everything else!

I really hope you get some more sleep. X

DD used to take 20-30mins, since she's turned 10 months she has a couple of 1 hour nap. It's bloody marvellous. So there is hope.