Guilty! BF and FF and feel so guilty.

[Shellpop]

I am FF my 10 week old during the day and BF feeding at night. Have been doing so since about eight weeks as realy felt DS wasn't getting enough. He has been a different baby since! This is my second baby, my first I BF exclusively for about four months. I must be comfortable with my decision or I wouldn't have done it but I feel so awful! There is no support anywahere for my decision and no advice. Please help me not to feel like the worst mum in the world!

of course you're not the worst mum in the world... the worst mum in the world wouldn't even be worrying about it would she? :)

if you are happy iwth your decision, and you are sure it's what is best for you and your baby then you have nothing to feel guilty about

it's worth remembering that every breastfeed counts as well. many of the benefits work on a kind of sliding scale... going up with every breastfeed, so it isn't a case of all or nothing., your baby is still benefitting from the breastmilk he is getting

fwiw i still feel guilty about stopping BF ds1 early on. i think guilt just comes with the territory doesn't it?

If he's happy and you're happy then it must be the best thing. No one worries when they are a grown up whether they were bf or not do they?

Look at it this way: you are still a BFing mother to your 10 week old baby and who knows? Maybe the fact that you are mixed feeding means you will keep BFing for longer than you would otherwise.

Bottom line is you are BFing and that is great for your DS. Good for you!

congratualte yourself for still BFing at 10 weeks! if it helps... the 'breast feeding gestapo' made me feel AWFUL when, despite trying really hard, I simply coudn't BF either of my sons. ironically, the ladies at the BF clinic made me feel the worst and reduced me to tears with both kids!

I had to start mix feeding at 6 weeks due to DD only gaining 5 oz in that time. I was devastated and felt like I'd failed. 6 days of top ups and she gained 21oz and was clearly a much happier little girl.

Now at 11 weeks she gets breast and formula at 7am and 7 pm and formula for her other feeds. She is doing brilliantly, perfect weight now, settled and contented.

My husband calls it the breast feeding nazis. I'm less harsh. Breast is best, if you and baby are happy and healthy. However, there is a substantial majority of people who struggle. My friends who'd I'd thought were happy EBF's have since admitted struggles. The rest of the NCT mums I meet are now struggling contemplating a bottle of formula at night due to lack of sleep for 12 weeks.

Mix feeding is a real option for alot of people but one that doesn't seem to be discussed anywhere. Only YOU know what is best for you and your baby. And I suspect far more people are mix feeding than ever admit it!!!

STOP FEELING GUILTY!!

You are doing a fab job And I say this as a breastfeeding peer supporter!

Your hormones that stimulate the production of BM work more at night so you are going about things the right way.

Mixed feeding is a totally workable option.

I have been mixed feeding DS since he was 5 days old as he was light 6lbs and lost more than 10% of his weight; wasn't regaining and i was anaemic (due to blood loss at his delivery) so was never able to produce enough milk.

Mixed feeding is fab. I breast feed him what i can at each feed (on demand) and then top up with formula till he tells me has had enough. He is now a strapping 11lb 11 week old.

Although not much of a routine - sorry to hijack this thread, but his natural inclination seems to be about 15mins breast + 70mls every 90mins. Yesterday I managed to make him go for about 3 hours before 2 of his mixed feeds, and he slept from 11.30pm to 5.30am longest ever. Just wondering how long your gaps are and if your DC can sleep long stretches at night?

Stop feeling guilty, right now, it does NO good. Keep telling yourself that - worrying and feeling guilty gets your nowhere and acheieves nothing so its a waste of avluable energy.

I excl bf ds until he was 3m and then mostly bf him until he was 9m when he self weaned.

Dd (now 15 weeks) was a different story, she had a tongue tie, jaundice and I had a pph which left me weak and the midwives practically forcefed dd formula - in fact, not practically, literally.

I mix fed until she was 12 weeks when she decided she didnt want to bf anymore.

I felt guilty and sick with worry and basically ashamed but now I have realised that I TRIED and actually, bf is great and wondeful and all that but it is NOT the be all and end all. It does NOT mean you are a bad mummy in any way shape or form.