Might be a weird question - feeding position with big boobs

[butternut234]

When I first had my son, because I have big floppy boobs the midwives in hospital taught me the football hold as they said that would be much easier. Fast forward a few weeks and I wanted to be able to breastfeed with bub on my lap as football hold no good when out.

So at the moment, we feed where he lies on a pillow on my lap.

My question is - all the books go on about me making eye contact with him while he feeds. BUT his eyes are looking out past my side (must be cos my boobs are too big!). And I'm not actually holding him, although I do cuddle him round the pillow.

Am I doing it all wrong??? If he can't look at me am I scarring him emotionally? And every photo I've ever seen of breastfeeding the mum is actually holding the bub, but my boy is being held on the pillow, I just stroke his hair or put my arm round him on top of that. If I try and hold him in my arms, my boobs are in the wrong place!

He's almost 6 months, so it does work, but suddenly panicking I am doing something wrong...

No you are not scarring him emotionally. If the position works for you and he is thriving then keep doing it. I'm currently feeding DD while typing this response so clearly she's deprived too :)
DD sometimes looks at me when feeding but mostly looks off into the middle distance lost in thought so it would be a waste of time trying to force eye contact.

I am the same. I can't look in dd eyes that much but I still talk to her all the time. I just can't latch her on with het eyes looking up!

I am doing the same as you with my daughter and she is fine. I use a boppy cushion and fed her in front of health visitors etc and they think it is fine. You have breastfed for six months which is brilliant and I bet he is a healthy happy baby.

You probably could feed without the pillow. Your baby is old enough now to get himself into position quite comfortably. I've also got big breasts and aside from those early weeks, have never needed a pillow.

My DS2 is 20 months and currently sitting upright on my lap, feeding. I usually read my laptop when I feed and give him the occasional pat, but he is a neglected second child.

Bigger breasts can be quite handy for feeding. I've fed my toddler as I relax in the bath, as he has been able to grab my boob and feed over the side! Lying down in bed is probably easier for women like us to feed too.

I find feeding on my right hand side a lot easier, so tend to feed off the right side more. I usually do it sitting cross-legged on a chair or on the floor.

Don't panic, you are doing nothing wrong!

I did worry about my boy not looking at me whilst i was feeding him also, but he does other more subtle things like holding my fingers or stroking my arm whilst i am feeding him. He always looks completely zoned out though, staring at my boob lol

Thank you, so reassuring :)

I do stroke his hair etc, and he pats me (when he's not riveted by the pattern of the cushion he can see sticking out from behind me)!

I will try crosslegged without a pillow, hadn't thought of that.

Thanks heaps for the reassurance! I didn't think he ever latched on that well which is why I stuck with the pillow to position him (he is more of the I'll-just-throw-my-head-back-and-let-it-gush-in type) but now he is bigger even my super fast milk requires him to use his proper technique and he looks more in control of it all!

I am of the big boobed variety as well and have found when bfeeding all of mine that I have to hold my boob during the entire feed or their heads would be round by my elbow(if that makes sense?) and I wouldn't be able to see them/have eye contact . Also, if I don't hold my boob I find the suction feeling unbearable and they tend just to stretch my nipple (which are also huge too, add my blue veins from bfeeding and I'm painting a picture of a gorgeous pair ).

I have been told that a rolled up flannel tucked under my boob would have the same effect, though fear it would actually require a rolled up bath towel!

As someone has said, eye contact is something of a disadvantage as they try to smile and babble while feeding.

Oh yes I forgot to mention I also have to hold my boob otherwise he runs away with it round my back... I did try the rolled up towel but it didn't really work. Glad to know I am not the only one - my friends all seem to have very well-behaved boobs that stay perky and in one place and the bubs just serenely latch on! Thank you!