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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

BFing while out

45 replies

LLKH · 23/12/2010 18:47

OK, now that DD and I have mastered bfing itself, how do I feel less self-conscious when we are out and she needs to eat?

Any advice?

OP posts:

GeekLove · 24/12/2010 20:52

I have breastfed my DS for 16 months and have not got a negative comment. I think the trick is to not be self-consious and get on with it. Plus people apprecate the non-crying baby aspect of it.

LeggyBlondeNE · 26/12/2010 11:24

Something else to bear in mind is seating while feeding. The small bucket arm chairs in costa, Neros and BHS cafe are lovely to feed in as they support your back well and you can rest your arms on the sides.

Porcelain · 26/12/2010 12:02

If you can't get a good feeding chair, and baby has good head control, try sitting up in a dining chair with baby straddling one of your legs or kneeling upright. You can support with your arm and by leaning back a touch, but it gives extra height to avoid hunching over and knackering your back.

Dozeyland · 27/12/2010 15:56

This is how i feel too OP

I BF in public for the first time yesterday at a HUGE family party.

felt embarrassed at first. its latching that i need to get use to. when she's on it;s fine. even had people coming over to see her and didn't realise

but i feel the same still. need to keep trying so i boost confidence!

What i ifind that helps, it wearing a boobtube vest underneath then it hides your tummy (pref black) then put a muslin over my shoulder, get boob out, latch baby on then it was ok.

YankNChristmasCrackers · 27/12/2010 16:12

My first public feed when DS was 1 week was at the very deserted end of a pub garden, sitting at a picnic table, facing the other way from everyone (who were at least 20 metres away).

I cannot believe I was ever that self conscious about it. I'm another that's been spoiling for a fight and got nothing but positive comments, smiles, or people just didn't even notice even when I was sitting right next to them.

Most recently in the crowded GP surgery sitting right next to an older gentleman, he didn't even twig and said 'awww he was nearly asleep!' I didn't tell him DS (now 16mo) wasn't just resting in my arms.

Waterfall cardigans are nice to give a bit of drape if you need it, but the baby's head covers loads.

Now I just have to put up with DS yanking my top down and shouting 'boo boo buh booo booo!!!' Much less discreet these days!

RJandA · 28/12/2010 10:18

How to feel less self-conscious? Just do it loads!

In a few months you'll laugh to think you ever worried about flashing a bit of boob. I was terrified to feed in public at first, now, at nearly 10 months, DD is at the stage where she likes to come off, arch her back and have a good look round the room halfway through a feed, and I couldn't care less.

Dreemagurl · 28/12/2010 10:41

Apologies for slight hijack here but just wondering how those of you with mahoosive knockers manage discreetly. Mine have grown to HH and still need both hands to feed as 9 week DD can't keep her latch if I'm not supporting my boob, and her tiny head in no way covers my boob (massive areola as well :( ) Have been ok feeding at other people's houses but usually need a pillow to support DD on - can't really take one into Costa!
Again sorry for hijack!

beanlet · 28/12/2010 11:38

My boobs have exploded to an H cup and I too have massive areolas. Have a look at yourself feeding in the mirror - I think you'll be surprised how little can be seen, especially if you push your overshirt down as close to the baby as you can.

estya · 28/12/2010 12:19

I have also ballooned to a HH and i spent a while holding my boob in so LO could breath. But the need disappeared when the health visitor corrected our position, moving her downwards (in her direction, either left or right in my direction) so the nipple is higher in her mouth and she has her head tipped back.
Not sure if this is worth trying for you, Dreamagurl, or if I was just lucky to get the use of my hand back.
I fold my coat on my lap to support her at the right height. Have also used the changing bag, which is good as it doesn't collapse, but its a bit slippery.
I am happy that when she is feeding, nobody can see my boobs, but my LO likes to come off for lots of breathers. My fear is people seeing my nipples when she comes off or I'm putting her on. Any tips for this?

LooL00 · 29/12/2010 13:54

If you sit right next to someone it is easier to be discrete than if you sit opposite them. If you're next to someone its easier for them to look away at that nipple flashing moment than if you're right in front of them.

FairiesWearSnowBoots · 29/12/2010 13:59

most comments i've had go like this...

"aww, is your baby asleep?"
"no, he is eating"
"oh"

i've not had a single bad comment. The weirdest was "have you been swimming?" - he thought that DS was a pile of towels!

BarefootShirl · 29/12/2010 14:39

I bf both DC and didn't make any major attempt to hide what I was doing. Generally I found if you just acted natural then people would leave you to it. Never had any negative comments, just the odd disapproving glance - probably for having my boobs out rather than actual bf.

kellestar · 30/12/2010 20:46

I did my first public breastfeed yesterday in a local coffee shop, DH was with me and had some nice comments, it's not as obvious as you think, it was only when a few people asked us about our dinky DD that we said she's feeding. I bought some slinky oversize cardi's in New Look sale that are easy to drape over parts of you that may be obvious. My first LO and she was 11 days old and fed like an angel. The hardest part is when she wanted winding in the middle, trying to tuck your nip away briefly while she's winded.

AnitaBlake · 31/12/2010 16:46

I've done Debenhams, McDonalds and a local pub. i love being able to feed her whenever and wherever. I've nearly almost converted a cousin too! Theres another LO in in the family and they both needed feeding atthe same time, i whipped out a boob, they had to boil the kettle, make the feed etc., etc. They were all very impressed .

In Debenhams, a lovely young dad started helping me with neice when he realised I was struggling with a five week old and a 18 month old. It was great! I just grin at anyone who looks at me, funny how many suddenly look really happy and wander off!

I've found my maternity tops have loads of drape to them, and fall just right. I also use a muslin, if I think I need it. Oddly the wierdest thing was my Granda staring directly at my boob, telling me how marvelous it was I was feeding her myself. He's very old-fashioned, and I was nervous about feeding in front of him! :)

blackeyedsusan · 31/12/2010 16:52

I used big baggy shirts that sort of flop over the exposed boob. a strategically placed pushchair can help too as a shield to the front and side as you latch on/off

PrincessScrumpy · 31/12/2010 16:56

Wear 2 tops - one, preferably a bf vest top so you can pull flap down (this ensures tummy is covered (which I felty important when out), the other, a roomier one that can be lifted up so it covers the top of your boob. That way only nipple is out and baby's head covers that. By 4 months I was opening the door and doing the housework while feeding!

mrsgordonfreeman · 31/12/2010 17:31

Dreemagurl, someone I know with a similar problem had a pillow with a shoulder strap that she took around with her. The idea was that you could remove the inner to turn it into a bag when you'd finished bf.

I will have a look.

aha!

thrupennybits.co.uk/ultimate-range

OP: congrats!

Original poster

LLKH · 02/01/2011 19:20

Well, I managed to bf the little one in the Great Court of the British Museum. I think I've cracked it. Thank you all for your encouragement.

OP posts:

Chocaholica · 03/01/2011 08:21

Well done! It gets easier after the first time, IME. My first time breastfeeding in public outside the house was in John Lewis espresso bar and I remember thinking everyone was looking at me. I soon got over that.

Dreemagurl, I need a pillow too, and I second MrsGordonFreeman. I bought that Thrupenny bit portable cushion when DD2 was born after a recommendation on here - hadn't had one for DD1 - and it has been fantastic, worth its weight in gold milk.

TBH though, I think we end up finding our own ways to feed out and about, and it changes as the babies get bigger anyway: easier to find a position, harder to keep the baby latched on and interested. Now (8 months) she is more interested in trying to snaffle my hot chocolate, as I try to keep her latched on....

Original poster

LLKH · 18/01/2011 19:18

To follow up, thanks again for all your support, I've definitely got it now - I've just managed to feed her twice on the bus!

(It was feeding or screaming...)

OP posts:

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