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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

bf while pregnant/tandem feeding - anyone any experience?

25 replies

harpsichordcarrier · 28/09/2005 11:48

sorry if this has been discussed before - I couldn't find a relevant thread.
I am 33 wks pregnant and bf my dd (2.5) three times a day. I have no idea how much she takes, but I have gone for three days with out feeding her on two occasions and haven't felt engorged. I only feed from one breast, and have done for god knows how long but a long time.
I have asked my mw about tandem feeding and she did this - >blank expression

OP posts:
hunkermunker · 28/09/2005 11:53

Hiya HC

I fed DS till he was nearly 17mo and I was five months pregnant (he stopped about a month ago now).

I was also feeding one-sided for the last few weeks (easier - he was only having one feed a day, in bed first thing in the morning).

I still have a bit of milk from that side, but the other boob's producing colostrum.

I wasn't sure if DS would continue to feed throughout my pregnancy and want to tandem nurse, so read a bit about it (on kellymom.com - have a look - good advice on there), you produce colostrum for the new baby, your toddler might go off the taste for a few days, but then often helps with your supply. You'll produce enough for both (mums have successfully fed triplets and a toddler doesn't take a huge quantity of milk as it's not their main source of nutrition). Your toddler won't be taking away from the baby - and it is said it helps with jealousy issues (and you get to sit down and feed them both

Good luck with it! Think La Leche League also publish a book about it (may have imagined this though).

frannyf · 28/09/2005 12:25

Yes, LLL have a book - "Adventures in Tandem Nursing"! You can buy it here . They also sell "Mothering your Breastfeeding Toddler", which is a great all round book for extended breastfeeding support, and has a section on tandem nursing.

I have no personal experience of this, but from reading books, 2/3 of toddlers wean themselves during the pregnancy, either in the 1st trimester when the milk may change taste and become less plentiful, or in the last trimester when the colostrum comes in. Your toddler won't be taking anything away from the baby, although there is some trick as to who goes first, I think (can't remember which way round it should be, either book will advise.)

I think you were lucky the midwife just looked blank, to be honest. It seems to push a lot of people's buttons, and even in cultures where they live a more "natural" lifestyle than we do, there are taboos about feeding while pregnant. I'm glad it hasn't stopped you and your daughter from continuing to enjoy it. Sorry this is no help as far as 1st hand experiences go.

Original poster
harpsichordcarrier · 28/09/2005 12:45

thanks both,
hunkermunker - so you were the one with the "clever" boobs on that thread the other day, that is so smart isn't it?
think I will get a book as I doubt dd stop anytime soon. I think she would fight off sabre toothed tigers with her bare hands if necessary... I did "stop working" (her words) in the first trimester but she persisted until I started again. She is one tenacious little girl...
would very much like to hear anyone's personal experiences.

OP posts:
staceym11 · 28/09/2005 12:57

will be watching this thread with interest, my friends is 17 weeks pg and bf a 16mth old, i asked her about tandem feeding as her ds wont take expressed milk or cows milk. she hasnt seemed to have any problems so far but anyones experience would be nice to offer to her!

kama · 28/09/2005 13:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Original poster
harpsichordcarrier · 28/09/2005 18:43

interesting kama, I have been telling dd that the new baby will have my milk as well. She is very interested in the idea, esp that the "spare" breast will start working again. who knows how she will react when the baby arrives tho.

OP posts:
Original poster
harpsichordcarrier · 29/09/2005 08:54

last bump in case any morning people out there can help me...

OP posts:
CKMUM · 02/10/2005 18:15

I feed a 20 month and 7 month old and the toddler doesn't seem to dislike the taste she still has several feeds day and night and always helps herself when she's tired, upset, ill or bumped herself.

At some point in pregnancy you willl start making less milk. This was a problem for me as my eldest was off her solids for three weeks while she was ill so was very hungry and feeding every half hour is notnice when you're pregnant.

I am prone to thrush anyway but especially when pregnant and nipple thrush is horrendous and in my experience hard to treat.

Engorgement is less of a problem as if you have a sleepy newborn who won't feed and you feel uncmfortably full you can get the eldest to relieve you, but then of course that stimulates more milk!

Towards the end of the pregnancy your milk will change to colostrum, the milk changes to meet the new baby's needs. The milk will probably come in fairly quickly though.

An obstetriciasn told me after the birth I would have to stop feeding the eldest and wait three days until I started again but she didn't say why and my midwife who also tandem fed couldn't understand why she said this.

pumpkincarrier · 02/10/2005 19:51

thanks CKMUM I was beginning to think I was the only one.... interesting about having to wait for three days, presumably to avoid the toddler taking the new born's colostrum?

spidermama · 02/10/2005 19:55

I tandem fed and it was fab. So empowering. It also helps so much for the toddler who is feeling jealous and put out.

I can't really remember about amounts or colostrum. If your toddler doesn't like the taste he/she might stop for a bit and resume (or not) at a later date.

You body sorts it all out for you. It all worked very smoothly and I felt like superwoman when I was doing it.

The bf network might be able to help. I didn't do any reading, myself, but just got on with it. My mws ver very supportive and helpful.

Good for you harpsi and all the best with it. Don't worry ... let it all flow.

emkana · 02/10/2005 20:03

I tandemfed for about six weeks after my dd2 was born, then dd1 decided off her own accord (sp?) that she didn't want to breastfeed anymore. Tbh I was very very glad she decided to stop because I really didn't like feeding them at the same time and I somehow irrationally felt that the milk "belonged" to dd2 now. I really think it helped with jealousy though - ie dd1 has never been for a minute jealous of dd2! I certainly didn't wait three days before letting dd1, and don't see why you should. Dd1 saw me in hospital an hour after dd2 was born, and I think she had a feed then, even though I don't remember for sure. She definitely did the next morning, when dd2 was only about 18 hours old.
Good luck!

pumpkincarrier · 02/10/2005 20:14

oh thanks everyone, am starting to look forward to it now

cod · 02/10/2005 20:15

Message withdrawn

emkana · 02/10/2005 20:18

Oh please cod do we have to?????

If you're really interested to know why people choose to feed a toddler, look at the kellymom website for example.

Sorry pumpkincarrier to answer on your behalf...

cod · 02/10/2005 20:19

Message withdrawn

emkana · 02/10/2005 20:19

Okay sorry will shut up.

Papillon · 02/10/2005 20:36

I am about 30 weeks pregnant and bf dd 2 years old. Plan to continue and tandem feed when baby is born in December. I normally feed once a day.

My midwife tandem feed both her kids and so is personally experienced and knowledgeable to boot, so I am lucky there.

Harpsichord your breasts will be already making colostrum.. will have done since about 4 months of pregnancy. My dd seems to like the taste and even more so the closeness. The general rule I have heard is that you feed the baby first and toddler after... so they will get hind milk.

pumpkincarrier · 02/10/2005 20:39

sorry cod just distracted by the "let's bash the dead princess" thread... last of the legal blood sports.
It's more a case of "why not" really. I have never really felt like stopping, and she hasn't either. I have left her with her dad a couple of times for 3 days/nights without any problems, and although both times I thought she might just give it up she has asked for it when I get back. It is three times a day, in her bedroom so it really isn't inconvenient for me.
you could say - too lazy/too much hassle to stop?
or - what would be the point, if both of us still enjoy it?
or - I am waiting for her to self wean

bambi06 · 02/10/2005 20:48

now i know why my ds went off my milk suddenly and refused point blank to drink any more in one day that was it ..obviously my milk must have changed taste and i didnt realise..thanks what an amazing knowledgeable lot you all are

cod · 02/10/2005 20:55

Message withdrawn

Jane17 · 02/10/2005 21:03

Hi, i'm new and coouldn't resist this thread. I am still feeding my ten month old ds (bedtime) and am now thirteen weeks pregnant with my second. I was thinking about when to stop but have a fantastic midwife, very supportive of tandem feeding. After reading all your experiences I feel a lot more relaxed about letting nature take it's course and letting ds finally wean himself. thanks

spidermama · 02/10/2005 21:12

Hello Jane.
My mw was very supportive. She said some babies/toddlers wean themselves when mum is pg because the mile tastes different (colostrum no doubt) but mine never did. I carried on as normal and it seemed the most natural thing in the world.

pumpkincarrier · 02/10/2005 21:15

dd has commented on the change in taste - for a while she said that it was "not working" but she persisted. I don't think for a minute she will give up now.

Jane17 · 04/10/2005 21:25

Thanks for that spidermama. I'll just carry on until he starts to wean himself or I get tired! No hurry now.

sweetkitty · 04/10/2005 21:54

I fed DD for 3 1/2 months whilst pregnant and she just stopped asking for milk she was a year and it was the best thing for both of us.

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