why is co-sleeping supposed to be easier for bfing??

[CamperFan]

By this I mean baby sleeping in the bed, not in the room. I would much prefer DS2 settled in his cot next to my bed, which he does during the first half of the night, not so much the second part of the night and often comes in my bed. What I don't understand is why people recommend sharing a bed to make bfing easier - you still need to wind baby, get up and change nappies, go to loo, swap sides, mop up copious amounts of sick all over the bedding, clothes etc (he is particularly pukey which is another issue entirely). So why is it better to share a bed, rather than feed in bed and transfer back to cot??

I've got three dcs all bf. DS had bad reflux and was on medication, used to lie him on a towel in bed on his left hand side, never bothered winding any of them at night - tended to bring it up themselves if needed. But I never let them cry so they took less in I think. With all of them I gradually move them into the Amby Hammock so it's an easy transition:)

So most of the research projects were abandoned...if that's the case where are you getting your data from?

Surely you must be able to find one study that backs you up?

This from the Telegraph appears to contradict what you are saying.

The research I found on co-sleeping and SIDS actually included 6 deaths as follows - most found under a parent, 1 or 2 (can't remember exactly) found at the foot of the bed and one had fallen out onto the floor. All of these deaths are tragic but none of them are SIDS and should not have been included in SIDS research.

The danger is with overheating, which is far more likely when the child is in bed with you. There is raw data out there, I know, I have read it. Also anecdotally I can tell you that I know of many women who have lost their child in this way.

FullaDoll, if you're going to make statements like that, you really need to back it up with some research!

But that boils down to doing it properly - i.e. making sure your baby isn't over-covered. My DS was a December baby but he couldn't have more than a cotton sleepsuit and a cotton blanket over him, and if he felt chilly at all, I would bring him under the sheet and blanket with me - but never the duvet. Far too hot.

I realise that over-heating isn't generally one of the guidelines mentioned for co-sleeping but it should be.

I think co-sleeping is a matter of personal preference (wins prize for stating the obvious), but factors which make it attractive or not depend on the baby and the mother, and factors including

• does the baby need winding after feeds?- people who say bf babies never need winding are wrong.

• is the baby bothered by a wet nappy? Seems some are and some aren't, and will the nappy last all night without leaking? Again, depends on the baby.

• is the baby a puker?

• how many times does the baby wake in the night? If you're only doing one night feed, having them in a cot is less of an issue than if they're feeding every 2 hrs or more.

• Do you like a drink in the evening?

I dont cosleep but can see why others do, or indeed don't.

Fulladoll sorry for your loss, but co-sleeping, safely with appropriate bed clothes, baby not between parents etc is a better way to regulate a babies body temp.

Skin to skin with mum, you can tell immediately if baby to hot and adjust bedding accordingly.

If a baby is on it's own in a cot wrapped up in blankets, swaddled etc then it is unable to regulate temp at all.

Well, the Foundation for the Study of Infant Deaths in the UK recommends that your baby sleeps in the same room as you, but in their own cot. They are pioneering research into SIDS, they are government-funded, and quite frankly, if they say you should do something to prevent SIDS, then personally, I would do it.

Well it's a personal choice, and we all have to do what we're comfortable with. I haven't yet seen any research that suggests safe co-sleeping is a risk (though I would definitely be interested in reading any you find) so am happy that our sleeping arrangements are fine.

Actually, looking at the FSID website, their advice also seems to be "co-sleep safely"

"Can my baby share my bed?
There are dangers in bedsharing. The safest place for your baby to sleep is in a cot in your bedroom for the first six months. There is a proven risk in bedsharing if you or your partner smoke (even if you never smoke in bed or at home), have been drinking alcohol, take drugs or medication that make you drowsy, or have had little sleep, or if your baby was born premature or was small at birth. If your baby does come into your bed, use lightweight blankets and keep your baby?s head uncovered and remember that accidents can happen. Never sleep together with your baby on a sofa or armchair. "

Basically the same as people have said on this thread - don't drink/smoke/take drugs, use light blankets rather than a duvet, and don't fall asleep in a chair or sofa.

No, their advice isn't to co-sleep safely, their advice is if you must co-sleep, then do so safely. There is a difference. FSID have never advocated co-sleeping.

I don't agree with their stance on this. It's very much - we don't believe you can do this safely so we recommend you don't do it at all. Similar to government advice on alcohol in pregnancy and IMO a bit patronising.
A good friend of mine is a paediatric pathologist - so she does post mortems when babies die suddenly and attends inquests. She has no dcs so has no vested interest. We were discussing co sleeping before my baby was born as I bf and co slept with dd1. She has been in her job for about 15 years and said that she has never seen a baby die where they were co slept with according to the safety guidance of UNICEF. That's good enough for me.

Bear in mind that their advice is (and always has been) that you should not co-sleep if you're particularly tired. So that rules out all parents of newborns then.

I don't know about that Dilys - once we finally got out of the hospital I never felt too sleep deprived. I think the co-sleeping helped with that!

I agree with moonunit - I found co-sleeping helped with the amount of sleep I got, rather than diminishing it - rarely if ever felt particularly more sleep-deprived than before. Certainly didn't seem to have that "first 6 weeks sleep deprivation from hell" scenario that has been mentioned countless times on here.

So, you co-sleeping parents never get sick or never drink alcohol?

You know I just knew the instant I typed that the the power of mn would flush out the only new mum in history who got loads of sleep

FullaDoll - the advice for co-sleeping is not to drink alcohol and if you're bf'ing you shouldn't be drinking anyway - what are you asking about being sick for?

This is not to mention the way that co sleeping can help a baby regulate its breathing.

I don't know about FSID and their recommendations, I don't drink or smoke. I don't share the bed with a great oaf.

and I would far rather my baby was beside me so I am aware of his breathing. I would remain in a semi-awake state much of the time anyway at times, which I think is great if it means you are immediately alerted when the sound or movement of the child changes.

Being able to pick up on these tiny signals also means you don't need to wait till they cry, you can respond to them before they make much noise at all.

I think I will stick with it.

Oh now I didn't say I got loads of sleep! I always needed at least 8 hours uninterrupted before the baby was born, and I never get more than 4 in a row now, but after the first couple of weeks I always felt I had just enough

I got enough sleep.

I don't so much now, but he's 3 now.

co sleeping helped I think.

If I've had a glass of wine with dinner I'll still sleep next to the baby later (one unit of alcohol takes one hour to leave your system apparently), but if I've been out drinking I sleep on the sofa and the baby has a bottle for his night feed.

I'm again with moonunit - it wasn't that we got loads of sleep but it was relatively easy to go straight back to sleep and I probably managed 7-8 hours (interrupted) over most nights. Usually only a maximum of 4 uninterrupted though, and as Catchthewind says, usually quite light sleep.