9wk old BF baby won't go longer than 2hrs between feeds,

[Gingerbics]

Absolutely shattered as got a todler who's up at 6 each morning too.
This little one wakes frequently, 2hrs is the longest he'll go, won't take a dummy. He's gaining weight and is thriving generally but I'm not!
He was snuffly for a few weeks so he slept in his bouncer chair (vibrating), it was the only way he'd settle. I now found he really won't settle in his carry cot.
I've tried offering both breasts but invariably will zonk out and appear full after just one. If I then change his nappy once he's fed,he gets really distressed.
Any advice, reassurance gratefully received.

Oh dear - I don't have any advice for you Gingerbics - just sympathy because I'm in exactly the same boat with a breastfed 14 week old - and he's been doing this for at least a month. I survive by sometimes halving the night with DH - would that work for you? I express a bottle for DH, who does half the night, giving the baby a drink from the bottle then swaddling him, giving him a dummy, and rocking him back to sleep. Then around 2am he's run out of milk and our baby's run out of patience with being fobbed off, and I do the other half of the night. That way we both get 3-4 hours of uninterrupted sleep. Would something like that work for you?

My son wouldn't take the flat orthodontic dummy but quite likes the cherry ones. We had to hold it in his mouth at first while he got used to the idea of sucking to keep it in, but now he's a pro. Worth trying a different kind of dummy, maybe?

Anyway, sympathy to you! You're not alone!

I'm in the same position here with a 5 week old! I was hoping the gap between feeds would get bigger the older he gets but from reading your messages I'm not holding out much hope!!

I've noticed all the posts are about boy babies. My friend told me boys are lazy feeders but I'd dismissed it as rubbish but is there truth in it?

I'll be watching this post with interest - 6 months of EBF will be hard work if it stays like this! Would be better for me if I could express milk but have been unsuccessful so far.

Aw, I can sympathise - both of mine were like this - frequent feeders and wouldn't take a dummy and it's so much more exhausting with the second, if the first is still a toddler.

Two things I found helped were co sleeping (not everybody's cup of tea, but you get a LOT more sleep) and trying not to look at the clock, at least during the night - it just upsets you. I never bothered too much about offering both boobs if they were asleep after one side, just tried to do the other one the next time. It didn't seem to cause any supply problems and I didn't explode or anything.

Stick with it, it does get better, honestly. Mine are 15 and 18 now and I look back on the BF days as some of the most precious parts of parenting.

Hello,

It is such hard work breastfeeding a young baby. My son is 12 weeks old and during the first 8 weeks he was feeding every 45-1hour. It was so hard.

He was feeding literally 18-20 times a day and it was exhausting. I tried to express, but expressing doesn't work very well for me.

Maybe you could try expressing some milk so that someone else can give your LO a bottle?

I know these early weeks are such hard work, but it does get better and does get easier.

Easier said than done, but just try and roll with it for a little bit longer.

Ally

If it helps, DS goes 3-4 hours between feeds during the day. There's hope!

Thankyou all so much for your kind messages and great suggestions, only got a couple of minutes now but will post a proper message when I get a minute ovcer next few days. Big thanks again. Yours exhautedly! X

Hi im new to the site and wanting to help where i can. im a mother of 2 (4yrs, 9mth) and a fully qualified breast feeding counsellor through le leche league.im so pleased to see all you ladies feeding your babies its such a hard thing to do and you should all be so proud no matter how long you managed to feed your babies. sorry to chat on...like i said im new to this type of thing so any advice is appreciated.

mine have all fed 1-2 hourly for months.

discovered co-sleeping and it is amazing. i'm still feeding lots, but it doens't disturb my sleep cycle really so i feel fine (unless one of the older ones wakes and i have to get out of bed!)

does your toddler nap? can you nap too? or lie down after lunch whilst toddler watches TV (it doesn't last forever and you can get them off the habit later)

sod housework and cooking from fresh, get ready meals/shopping delivery/lower standards around house!

BTW, i don't necessarily think "feeding your babies its such a hard thing to do" hayley. So is ff, in fact, having a little baby can be hard however you feed them! it might put people off bf if they think it is harder...

you obviously know lots more about it than me i apologise for my comment and will be removing it.....

sorry OP, but mine did this until she was 6 months.

Not much help, but just showing it's within the normal range. Once I stopped stressing about what MIL people thought, I relaxed and just went with it. On the plus side she was/is a quick feeder

My DD is 19weeks and still bf every 1.5-2hrs in the day, she wont take a dummy and is currently using me as one as she has a 'sleepy feed'!

I also have a DS who is 3.5yrs old and I find it hard giving him the time he needs. In last two days DD has started taking a few short naps in her cotbed but before this she would only ever sleep on me, in car or in buggy.

She has also last week started to only have 1 feed in the night, before that it was normally 3 :-)

Hayley dont remove your comment everyone is entitled to their own opinions and views, I happen to agree that bf is hard, I have done bf and ff and especially when have another child bf has been the hardest personally for me.

My DD is nearly 17 weeks and still feeds every 1.5-2.5 hrs in the day and rarely naps. If she does nap its only in the car/pram or after 30 plus mins of determined bouncing in her bouncy chair. It is exhausting isn't it and must be so much harder with a toddler to consider as well.

I agree with Hannah7 absolutely do not remove your comment Hayley. For a lot of women breastfeeding is hard work and it is counter productive to pretend otherwise. If you keep telling everyone how easy it is when clearly sometimes it isn't you will have a lot of mums wondering what on earth they are doing wrong when in fact they're doing everything right.

thanks to you both. i totally agree. some women assume bf is easy because it the 'natural' thing to do. women need to no it can be hard and is totally normal to come across problems. my first was a breeze, my second still is a struggle and im supposed to have all the answers. to keep in with the convo can i ask what the DD andDS is? new to this site so need some help. thaks!

just a quickie to say my DD2 (now 20 weeks) was exactly the same, and is still a very frequent feeder - every 2/3 hours, sometimes more!

We get through it by co-sleeping and also I don't change her nappy overnight, if she's sleeping that's fine by me, no need to disturb her.

Also, can't your partner get up with the toddler at 6am so you can have a bit more rest? DH gets up with DD1 at 7am, takes her downstairs, gives her breakfast and brings me tea and cereal in bed. It just gives me an extra half hour to lie in bed and snuggle with my sleepy baby . It doesn't last long as DD1 invariably climbs in bed with me for cuddles and stories at 7.30 while DH showers, but at least it's a nice lazy way to wake up.

DD = Dear Daughter
DS = Dear Son

I'm new here too and still getting used to all the acronyms :) There's a page here with them all listed ... www.mumsnet.com/info/acronyms

sorry hayley, i certainly didn't mean you should remove your comment. i was just surprised that a LLLL would say that. I agree that for some women it is hard, but i wouldn't want anyone to give up/not start thinking it was too hard universally, everyone's experience is different. just because you ff it doesn't mean it is easy. i agree bf can be very intense as no-one else can share the feeding, but they could certainly help with other dc or household chores or cook a meal so mum can rest if knackered from feeding lots at night.

OP, i hope things are OK, it doesn't last forever! (but seems like it at 3am).

Ive just started to "eek" out my 21 week boys feeds to 3 hrs and he seems to be coping ok with that now. It is really hard with a baby and a toddler. Good luck to us all. Let's hope things settle down soon!!

as a LLLL we are encouraged to discuss how difficult bf is to help women understand that problems are normal and that if women do suffer set backs,that it is perfectly normal and that they are doing the best they can for their babies.personally if someone told me how easy it was or it wasnt difficult and i was having problems i would feel like i was doing something wrong. in my own experience i have found bf difficult at times especially with my 2nd, im open about this and want to tell people that ive found it challenging and wanted to reach for the formula at times. even being a qualified counsellor doesnt make me superwoman. also i have looked back in my LLL training book and also the new 'breast is best' book and they both state "breastfeeding is challenging, hard work but also extremley rewarding"....

OP, I would second (third?) the suggestion to co-sleep. If you can feed lying down, then (with a bit of practice) you can latch your baby, and go back to sleep while he feeds. Bliss! Also, I find it easier to spend time with my toddler if I can be feeding a baby in a sling. Doesn't work for all mums/babies (with ds1 we never managed it, dt1 isn't keen on slings, while dt2 enjoys it), but worth a try.

Hayley, I have found bf intense, and often hard work, particularly in the early days/weeks, but I still don't think of it as "a hard thing to do".

glad to hear you didnt find it hard but like i said lots of women do. im rather upset and annoyed that i registered with this site only days ago and people are having a go at me for saying breast feeding is hard work??? to be honest lots of people have discussed co-sleeping as a bfc im supposed to discourage this as it can be extremely dangerous....however i haven't but im on the recieving end of critisism for saying bf is hard! i came on this site to see if i could help anyone with giving advice an info but i have hit a brick wall so wont be coming on here again as im clearly not welcome.

Hayley - I think it's because you said 'it's such a hard thing to do', which seems like a sweeping generalisation. Yes, with some babies for some women it can be hard work or a 'hard thing ' but it is not true for each and every woman or baby. Your knowledge as a bf counsellor could be very helpful to users of this site. No-one has flamed you and on a public forum people are entitled to their opinions.

Hayley - don't leave, the attacks aren't personal. It's just that lots of people read MN and it's important that any advice is as accurate as possible (esp if it comes from a counsellor). So, yes, bfing is hard for some, not for others. Formula feeding can also be hard and brings its own challenges. On the otherhand, you are entitled to have your own opinions - just make it clear that it is an opinion.

On a different note, I am genuinely interested in your suggestion that as a LLL counsellor, you are not 'supposed' to encourage co-sleeping. I suppose I'm surprised because all the LLL counsellors and supporters I have met have been pro- safe co-sleeping and even the LLL website says:

'Cosleeping can be a safe and warm way to parent babies. We encourage each family to make an informed decision about what will work best for them.'

www.llli.org/FAQ/cosleep.html

Can you elaborate more on the guidance you were given?

ive not come on here for arguments. i will stick to the women that would like my help rather than picking on how i word things. people can have an opinion on what i said but im not allowed to write what i think? shocking.

because i work alongside a health visitor i am not allowed to encourage it. its outlined on my guidlines. there are lots of things im not allowede to say when im working, even down to encouraging dummies. i did it with my first for a year but im not supposed to inform mothers of this.

Of course you can have an opinion. We all can. That's what MN is about. The OP asked for advice and lots of other mums out there may be lurking, reading this page - they are entitled to receive a range of views, so that they can formulate their own opinion at the end of the day.

OP - as others have said, what you are describing sounds totally normal, although tiring for you. Really hope it is working out for you OK.