Exhausted from feeding

[pamplem0usse]

By the middle of last week my 5wo daughter had spent ten days feeding every hour (or less) day and night, with maybe one three hour sleep a day if we were lucky.....
She was born with a tongue tie and so fed very inefficiently so the hourly feed would last maybe half an hour.... sometimes she'd feed continuously for 6-8 hours. The tongue tie was sorted but we're still really struggling to get her to feed fficiently despite the fact she latches properly now.
After ten days of almost constant crying and exhaustion on my part we introduced a bottle of formula around once a day and I attempted to express a further bottle, so someone else could feed her and I could sleep. Expressing this additional bottle was a nightmare (and continues to be!) given how little she sleeps.......
I've tried so hard to get advice. Unfortunately the HV who visited here because I'm on the verge of PN depression gave such helpful advice as changing the position to one which hurt me alot and my DD hated so thrashed around (she then proceeded to suggest I use a muslin to restrain her by tying it around her arms....
I'm not prepared to see her again as this is tantamount to child cruelty IMO.
I'm getting desperate though. I really want to breast feed and bottle feeding her makes me cry, but noone will give me any advice on trying to build up my supply. I'm sure this is the issue as it's a known problem with tongue-tie babies and my DD will drink 150ml+ of formula in the evening even after having been BF for over an hour and a half.
Can someone please help? The only help I'm getting from family is to FF her more, which I really want to avoid. I know the formula could potentionally affect my supply and have been pumping like a demon to try and stop this, but at certain times of day I can virtually express nothing :( In the 'early days' I could express 150ml a session, now it's 25ml if I'm lucky....

pample - try biological nurturing it's a very gentle natural way of starting nursing your baby and it most certainly doesn't involve tying your baby up it does involve lots of skin to skin (which is good for baby and you as it helps release oxytocin [the bonding/love hormone).

How are you being looked after? Are you still doing the housework/cooking/going shopping? Or are you relaxing with baby (inasmuch as you can with a baby who feeds hourly - hats off to you). The washing can wait until later.

On increasing your supply you need to be nursing or expressing 8-12 times a day (volume out doesn't matter it's the nipple stimulation that helps increase supply - it's also not indicative of how much baby is getting). There is some great advice here about a 1/3 of the way down there is a section called 'increasing your milk supply'.

Persevering through tongue tie and frequent nursing is very amazing and you sound like a very kind and caring mum. It's difficult in the early days for everyone but especially if you are dealing with PND too (I've had it 3 times to one degree or another). Be kind to your self.

Hi Pamplem0usse, first of all congratulations on the baby AND on working through the tongue tie issue. Having done it a few months ago, I remember how phenomenally difficult it can be. However, it can be sorted: DS is now over 8 months and still bfding- did so exclusively until 6 months and then again for the last 3 days, due to an infection.
Try calling the nct helpline ( no need to be a member), la leche league, association of breastfeedjng mothers, national breastfeeding helpline- keep trying until you get the advice you need. Sometimes they also run bfding cafes and/or can arrange a home visit by a volunteer. I had one and it was extremely helpful.
Also try the infant feeding coordinator at your hospital- again, mine was v helpful.
Where are you? If in London, I can come back and post more details-currently on phone with dead battery, so must be off, sorry!

Tying the muslin round her arms isn't child cruelty, honestly. With dd2 (& dd1) we use a sheet which we tuck over her arms and under her body. This calms her down, keeps her arms out of the way, but means that when she is latched on you can easily release the arms to allow them to use them to 'pump' out the milk.

This was recommended to me by a breastfeeding counsellor 3 years ago with dd1 & I am doing it with dd2 right now. Dd2 at 2 weeks already associates this swadi g with being fed.