Help - can't decide whether to stop BF 17mo

[essenceofSES]

DS is 17mo next week and I've BF him from birth. We've had our challenges to this, starting with the fact he had an undiagnosed tongue tie for the first month.
I've enjoyed BF on the whole but I'm now starting to think about stopping. My reasons for this are:

• it's getting more and more painful. Not sure whether this is because DS now has 16 teeth or because he likes playing with the nipple he's not feeding off. The last 2 days as I've been feeding him, I've vowed to stop because of the pain.
• we're wanting to ttc again and although I've got my periods back in May, I'm not sure I'm ovulating every month (have been temping)
• he still feeds to sleep most evenings and I'd like to get him to self settle

On the other hand though...

• I know the longer I BF the better it is for him
• he doesn't show any sign of wanting to stop
• if it's what settles him, why stop?!

I can't seem to get my head reconciled with either option. Any thoughts or advice?

TIA

Bump!!

my only thought is that if you aren't sure then don't stop, you might regret it

if it's getting painful then something is not right, you could well be right about the teeth, it can sometimes alter their latch.
if you don't like him playing with the other nipple then don't let him! keep it under lots of clothing, and give him a toy to play with. if he grabs for the nipple just move his hand away

ttc- well just go for it i reckon! you can always reconsider breastfeeding if you fail to fall pregnant can't you?

you can get a BF baby to self settle. honest! mine has just started, he is 16 months too

where in surrey are you? i am in sussex and i know there are a couple of baby cafes in surrey which may be helpful for advice on the painful feeding?

Thanks - maybe I'll take it a day at a time at the moment.
I live near Reigate and work in Sussex. I did go regularly to Baby Cafe for 6mo after DS was born and found it useful but he never feeds during the day now - just on waking and at bedtime. I suppose I could still ask their advice.

I try to stop him playing but need to be a bit firmer. If I give him a toy, he throws it on the ground as that's not what he wants!

yeah you should, it's nice to talk to other BF mums! I am in Crawley so not a million miles from you.
i don't know if there is a more local one but there is a La Leche League group in Horsham that I go to as well which I found has a lot more "extended" breastfeeders

Hi Ses!

As you may remember I bf DS1 when pregnant with DS2, and he self-weaned at around nearly 3. I can't quite remember when, but I tandem-fed for a few months.

Pros:

• when heavily pregnant it was a great excuse to cuddle up on the sofa with DS1 and relax.
• it helped prove to him that I was still his mummy even though new baby was here
• I had gestational diabetes and breastfeeding helped regulate my blood sugar during pregnancy
• it was easier to carry on
• having an expert toddler around was handy to sort out engorgement/supply, particularly in the early days

Cons

• DS1 upped his feeds when DS2 was born so I felt like I was continuously feeding
• it was painful in the early days of pregnancy

If we go for number 3 I'd definitely carry on feeding DS2. I can't really think of good reasons to stop. It may well be coincidental but neither of the boys have had anything but minor colds despite exposure to all sorts of nasty bugs, including chicken pox.

Thanks Llare, that's helpful too.
I fed him this morning and kept my hand over the other nipple and refused to budge.

Does anyone know if painful nipples is more common around the time of ovulation?

yes, it is, i always get sore nipples when i ovulate, and also when my period is due

Thanks! Think that may be part of the problem at the moment then!

I'm in a similar situation with my DS (17mo). Your list of pros and cons is pretty much exactly the same as me!! I sometimes love BFing but sometimes just get fed-up of it and feel like packing it in!

I've also got sore nipples just now because his canines are just coming in and his latch is rubbish.

I'm keeping going with it for now, but just wanted to say that I feel the same

Good to hear from someone in the same boat :)

I'm taking it a day at a time but feeling more positive about continuing for the moment.