Could you help me get this clear in my head? Confused re going back to work, expressing, weaning. sorry tis long...

[holytoast]

Hi all
DD is 23 and a bit weeks, EBF, and its going great, we both really love it. I am going back to work in 5 weeks, DD will be turning 28 weeks. I am keen to try BLW when weaning her, and keen if I can, to continue feeding until January - I am a teacher, and I have one 7 week term of 4 day weeks to get me to the hols. (not counting the days already or anything......) anything beyond January, to a year, for example, would be an amazing bonus, but I like to set myself sort of attainable goals and go from there!

Have been given lots of different advice, but I am starting to get really confused now, wonder if any of you might be able to help understand my options?

As far as I see it, I have the following options available, given that we are probably not going to be getting any serious amounts of solids into her any time soon (DD has already been playing with food and exploring it and seems really keen - nothing going in yet though, and am cool with trying some purees too, just dont want to push her before she is ready.)

She takes bottles ok, and holds her own sippy cup and shoves it in her eyes drinks from it a fair bit, although only playing with it at the mo.

1. Start cutting out feeds and replacing with formula - but I am lazy, DD still wakes at least twice a night, and have no idea how she would take to it.

1. Expressing at work for all the milk she would need - but main problem is that although expressing is fairly ok for me - can get 4oz quite soon after a feed usually, I cant see it working long term - I am just too busy at work and breaks aren't regular or reliable. dont think I would get enough for all her feeds. I also don't know what the minimum seesions would be for expressing and keeping supply, and not getting engorged (see watermelons, below)

1. Get childminder to give formula, and feed whe I'm with DD. (from about 4pm at the earliest, leave for work at 7:15.) but would my suppply stay good enough? and would I end up engorged when at work? don't think I could cope with that - cant just nip off to make things more comfortable if teaching. Also teaching an all boys school. watermelons up top not a good look.

1. Feed nights, morning, evenings, the same, feeds every day ,7 days a week. give formula the rest of the time. gradually tail off to achieve this between now and going back.

I have a freezer stash, and can get a fair amount more before then, and DD can have 3 meals a day at childminders, who I think would be ok with giving finger foods, so would it potentially be a small amount of milk, of any kind, she would need during the day?

and thats it...dont know if there are any other options? Really, in my heart, I know I want to keep going, even if its just a transition to make it easier for me DD going back to work, but also just dont know by then how many feeds she is likely to need in a 7 - 8 hr period. Also, dont think I can cope if she starts to try and catch up at night, I need to get some sleep, I am a horrible person without it!

Sorry tis is so long, have searched threads and asked so many different people, I am confusing myself as to what might be best!

oh wise MNers, help me understand....

Well I guess you need to decide what you'd prefer to try and have fall back options if needed.

I express whilst at work, twice a day (she is now 28weeks) and I think I might be near dropping to once a day and using freezer stash as required. I also express in the evenings just to get a little more.

Babies can take less than you would expect, we limit her bottles to 1oz per hour, so if it's been 3 hours since her feeds, she is offered 3oz. This prob leads to catchup in the night, but that's the price I'm happy to pay (plus tbh she's a crap sleeper regardless).

If you get 4oz without her missing a feed, then hopefully you'll get more once your at work. If I time it right I can get 8oz, but normally closer to 6oz (and always 4oz in late afternoon).

By no means do I express at regular times in the day, more when work allows. If you're prepared you can get it all done in 15mins and drink tea/coffee while your doing it.

She typically has 10oz when I'm gone and sometimes I'm out for up to 10hours

I think you can't expect her to quickly drop the milk, but you don't have to offer free for all's during the day either and hopefully (fingers crossed) she'd have taken to solids really well by then. Luckily LO seems to be getting the hang of solids and has dropped about an 1oz already.

You can also just give the caregiver what you've expressed/defrosted and have formula on stand by to be no more than 1 meal a day. If LO is out of food and I'm only going to be an hour then DH offers water and solids.

By the sounds of things, you don't need to make a decision until you've been back at work for a few weeks (you've got enough frozen). Just see how it goes and re-evualate if things aren't working out for you.

Sorry that was a right old ramble. Hope it makes sense

Just rememeber there is no right or wrong decision. Only you know how you feel about the different options.

Thanks - thats really helpful to know that you get by expressing just twice - I could possibly manage that short term. I suppose it really will have to be trial and error to see what works for her. I haven't ever been able to express in the evenings, just doesn't seem to be anything there, but could try again I suppose.
Do you find you get uncomfortable only expressing twice in the day, or is it enough? I think thats what I am worried about - and leaking - but I guess if I am prepared with a change of top and all the expressing gear ready for breaks it might work. Its interesting that you manage to do it at different times of day, I assumed it would have to be similar times for some reason.

I think the problem is that we aren't really in a routine as such, so at the moment I have no clue as to what she is likely to need during the day, and as you say, it could change depending on how well she takes to solids. but the 1oz per our is interesting, thought it would be likely to be a lot more.

Thanks - and not a ramble at all, really helpful - by the way, love the nickname, wish I was still a climberchick, got hooked a couple of years ago, then had a back injury (rollerskating, not climbing [blush because in my 30's emoticon]) and then got pregnant..havent done it since .

Hi holytoast. I went back to work full time when DS was 8mo (he was EBF on demand until 6mo - still BF now at 17mo). I spent ages beforehand in a complete stress over what to do when I went back to work. I was rubbish at expressing.

He wouldn't take a bottle at all, but would take a little bit of formula/expressed milk/cow's milk from a sippy cup during the day as well as solid food. It was nothing like the amount he would have over a normal BFing day though.

BUT found that he was actually completely fine, even without taking in very much milk while I was out at work (he had water available too during the day). I would BF (and still do! ) when I came in from work and at weekends on demand.

After a little while your boobs also adjust to the change and I very rarely get engorged anymore even if I haven't fed DS for over 12 hours.

I also made sure he had some other dairy in his diet during the day e.g. yogurt, cottage cheese etc.

Babies are amazing at adapting to changes like this, and BFing when you go back to work is a lovely way of connecting with each other again when you get home again!

Don't worry too much - it'll all fall into place.

I've only been climbing twice since I've moved so should maybe change my name. You need climbing partners to make you go, I keep promising to go and check out the wall, but come the weekend, I'm knackered .

At first I was fine expressing twice a day, but I was more than ready to feed her as soon as I got home. My body quickly adapted.

I agree with OhNo, I spent too much time stressing out beforehand and really there's nothing to decide until it happens. I went back when she was about 16 weeks so solids weren't even on the radar.

I don't need to express in the evenings, but I hate having just enough milk so like the safety net.

Thank you both, you hav emade me feel better about this - I am a worrier, need to cut it out, there is only going to be more stuff to worry about!

Going to start getting up at the same (ish!not 6am!) time that I would have to when at work, and seeing how our day goes with a little bit of routine, at least I will know how many feeds she will roughly need - just havent been counting them up until now. She also gets a lot for comfort, not sure how this will work with bottles.

Have been expressing too, and it really hasn't taken long - 7 mins this morning to get 4oz, so I think I can fit it into my 20 min break.

Thanks for helping me get it a bit clearer - I guess I forgot how adaptable they are at this age too, and boobs are a wonderous thing - adaptable too!