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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

What would you do?

22 replies

SirBoobAlot · 22/09/2010 08:18

DS is ten and a bit months. He is a happy, healthy, active chap, and still loves milk. He's dropped from the 25th (which he has been on since birth) to the 9th percentile recently, and is now slightly below the 9th as well. Have been advised to give him lots of fatty foods during the day and up both his milk and solid intake if possible.

Would you consider night weaning with all this? He feeds at least twice a night, and they're long feeds. I would be happy to just get it down to one, but would prefer him to sleep through obviously

I don't want to put his health / weight in jeopardy, but I think I might loose it if I don't get some better sleep soon. Any suggestions?

OP posts:

coldcomfortHeart · 22/09/2010 08:23

Hmmm a tricky one. I know you might get responses saying he will make up for it in the day, but as you asked what I would do personally, I think I'd stick with the night feeds. Sorry, I know that's probably a bit of a painful response! And then re-evaluate at 12 months.

Original poster

SirBoobAlot · 22/09/2010 08:27

I'd rather have honesty!

I'd love some sleep but obviously DS is my priority. Am co-sleeping a lot so I can get some sleep, but I never sleep well with him next to me (single bed).

OP posts:

jemjabella · 22/09/2010 09:10

I wouldn't consider night weaning before 12 months, irrelevant of weight gain - I personally believe that babies still get a lot of emotional fulfilment from night time breastfeeds. (Obviously if baby has naturally started sleeping through this is different.) :)

wastingaway · 22/09/2010 09:12

I would keep at it tbh.

I'm guessing he's getting more active lately?

Also, what centile is he for height?

If you can get him drinking more in the day, he might start going longer at night on his own iyswim.

Original poster

SirBoobAlot · 22/09/2010 09:39

During the day he still feeds a lot - at least every two hours, normally more.

Height he's on the 7th, and head circumference is 75th - both have stayed the same since birth.

He has been walking holding onto my hands for about two months I think, and spends most of his time when not in the buggy either walking with me, in his walker or crawling.

I don't think I can actually get any more food into him if I tried, but some days he is really difficult with eating.

Feel like I must be screwing something up somewhere as everyone keeps telling me he should be sleeping through by now / that I need to take on the role of the parent and stop letting him control me. Whilst I disagree with this entirely it still makes me feel as if I'm getting something wrong.

OP posts:

tiktok · 22/09/2010 09:44

I'd agree with coldcomfortheart....now is prob not the time to be doing anything that restricts your ds's intake. You've been advised (presumably by people who have seen him, assessed him and who know about infant nutrition) to up his milk intake....you'd be doing the opposite to night wean.

You can always re-assess when the weight issue is resolved or else checked out as being fine after all :)

Are there other ways to get more rest and sleep for you in the meantime?? You're right it's important not to lose it :(

tiktok · 22/09/2010 09:45

It is, as you know, perfectly normal for babies of this age to wake and need to feed in the night. This is not a reflection on your parenting at all - tell them where to stick their useless comments :(

jemjabella · 22/09/2010 09:48

Come on SirBoob, you know it's bugger all to do with your parenting / something you've done wrong. :) You may know from the Nov 09 that DD and I are going through the same thing (although 2 feeds in a night is a good night for me)!

eaglewings · 22/09/2010 09:50

As nightfeeds are still important, as shown from the responses already given, how about changing your bed to one that is more friendly to co sleeping?

Is there anyway you could fit in a double mattress? Could you borrow one to try it out?

mummynoseynora · 22/09/2010 09:56

is it me or if he's on 7th line for height, then just under 9th for weight is fine! he's matching? and if he walks lots holding on to things then that will be why he's dropped off slightly?

sounds fine to me!

Any hoo - if you are concerned, then maybe try to alter his actual food a bit? cheese sauce on things is a good one for some easy calories

Original poster

SirBoobAlot · 22/09/2010 10:09

Guess I just need to hear its normal. We're at the age now where people have started commenting about "STILL" breastfeeding, and about how I need to get him used to a bottle at some point because I can't feed him forever. That combined with teething combined with sleep regression has me pretty much convinced I'm making mistakes somewhere.

I'm really proud of the fact he has never had any formula, and I don't intend for that to change. But I am so sleep deprived at the moment, its worse than the newborn stage. He is currently pulling all the wet wipes out of a bag and I am leaving him to it.

I don't want to be panicking about his weight all the time :( The HV at the group who has seen him knows how active he is because she seems him every week and has said not to worry, just to try and up his food. Now most days he will have a whole bowl of porridge, some fruit and a yoghurt for breakfast, lunch the equivalent of a whole 10 month jar of food, and the same for dinner with fruit and yoghurt for desert, plus snacks (normally crackers, breadsticks and cucumber) through the day. Plus milk every two hours.

Night time he is feeding normally at 12, 3 and 5, though the last few nights it has been every two hours.

Okay, so nightweaning is a no. I thought that was what you would all say... Can't blame a girl for trying though!

OP posts:

jemjabella · 22/09/2010 10:20

Some babies are just small. We can't all be average/50th centile/smack bang in the middle. :)

What time are you getting to bed? I find that makes the biggest difference to me. Last night we didn't get to sleep until gone midnight and this morning I'm absolutely buggered. Normally I make sure I'm in bed for 9pm and this allows me to function after 4-5 night feeds. (Yes, I am a soft touch, no I don't care! )

wastingaway · 22/09/2010 10:26

Oh SirBoob, I remember it well, and it does end eventually, I promise!

You're doing so well and are right to be proud, it sounds like he's doing brilliantly.

Original poster

SirBoobAlot · 22/09/2010 10:28

I have M.E., and because of that I find it very difficult to get to sleep before 11pm. I try to be in bed by 10pm, but find myself generally just staring up at the ceiling. I'm sure this isn't helping, but there is nothing I can do about it. And trust me, I've tried! :(

Okay no seeing as I'm not going to nightwean, could I have a cure for M.E., please?

OP posts:

wastingaway · 22/09/2010 12:00

Not a cure, but I'm sure some chocolate would help.

jemjabella · 22/09/2010 16:04

:( I'm all out of suggestions, sorry. Like wastingaways' idea

BertieBotts · 22/09/2010 16:20

I don't know if you're open to it/whether it's an option financially, but my Mum has ME and she finds Reiki helps enormously. It's at a very manageable level for her now.

Could you use a bedside cot at all? If he is in his own little space it might be less disturbing for you. Co-sleeping in a single bed doesn't sound much fun :(

eaglewings · 22/09/2010 18:57

Sorry, I don't know a cure for ME, but I found when I had mine and then bf for 4 years each, I was better. It was when I stopped the ME got worse again.

Its not a reason to BF, but its a good way of shutting up people who tell you to wean before you want to.

Look on the internet for the Essex Chronic Fatigue service, they have some useful ideas. There may be a similar one in your area, but I had to find out about mine and ask the GP to refer me.

I'm ttc#4 so I hope it works again!

Original poster

SirBoobAlot · 22/09/2010 19:22

Eagle I know what you mean :) Though unfortunately mine seemed better during pregnancy / for the first six months post partem, then look a bit of a down turn. I shall certainly be bearing that in mind for my own reference as well as shutting people up though, thank you! Maybe they just need to inform all CFS patients to get pregnant and keep their boobs out for a bit Good luck with TTC :)

Bedside cot not an option unfortunately. Its been okay during the summer, but because of the lay out of our room too, my bed is right next to the radiator, and the window. I'm worried he'll wake up slightly before I do, and wiggle down just slightly and burn himself. I will look into Reiki though, thank you - I'm not sure as would depend on the costs but will try anything tbh.

Guess there has been a lot more going on in my head than just night feeds

He has another hospital appointment (unrelated to weight) next week and I'm concerned they will suggest formula top ups because of his weight as well.

But anyway - do you (all) think it would be plausible to persuade him to have one longer feed during the night instead of multiple ones? Or is that something I am really going to have to grin and bear for now? Know it sounds terribly selfish, but even just missing one feed at the moment would be great.

OP posts:

ClimberChick · 23/09/2010 05:35

Hi Boobs,

I've faced similar quandaries (but with her feeding EBM during the day). The main thing that stops me artificially changing her feeding routine is the what if's. What if he really is hungry, that doubt and uncertainty undermines me and so I can never go through with settling her without offering food.

So I guess the question is, how would you feel if he woke and wouldn't settle. Would you be able to see it through.

As others have also said, if you are worried about the weight then it will add to the not feeling good when doing it.

The drop in percentile doesn't sound anything to worry about, but even when you know that, it's still worrying (mine's done worse, also started on 25th, now just below 2nd). IIRC correctly yours in walking and a lot of 10months don't walk, would that impact on weight?

Which county are you in? I know a few Reiki people in the UK

tapan · 23/09/2010 20:07

gina ford would suggest gradually cutting down the length of the night time feeds to make the child extra hungry in the day for things higher in calories

just a suggestion. happened to read it in her weaning book yesterday. have no idea if that would be do-able.

MustHaveaVeryShortMemory · 23/09/2010 20:43

I would aim to stop at least one of those night feeds. He will make up for it in the day. Could you try just giving him a cuddle and see if he will just nod off without feeding? Sounds obvious but it worked for me. You could at least try.

His weight/height sound normal esp if he's become very active.

Of course they love their night feeds, cosy, cuddle with Mummy to themselves - but it sounds like you need a bit of kip.

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