please reassure me re BF, feeling down

[ThisIsBloodyHardWork]

My baby is now almost four weeks and I'm struggling to feel positive about her feeding. I've seen various professionals and everyone says I know what to do to get the latch right but I don't always manage it. Sometimes she struggles and cries - I posted before about this - sometimes she feeds for awhile, and sometimes she feeds a few minutes. Loads of wet and dirty nppies, last week she was weighed and is on a reasonable line - but I feel really paranoid in case I'm doing it 'wrong.

She sometimes goes a few hours between feeds -up to 4 hours once in a while - and sometimes wants to feed after an hour or even 45 minutes. Is this ok at this age? will it get better ie will she fall into more of a pattern? I've heard BF is usually established by 6 weeks, and I'm worried it's not on an upward curve.

It doesn't help that I'm really paranoid after having a bad bf experience with my first child - struggled for a few weeks and thn he just got more and more upset when I tried to feed him. I gave up at 6 weeks and am now so worried something similar will happen. The presence of a toddler distracting me when trying to feed doesn't help either.

Does this all sound familiar? will it be ok? please help me to feel more positive ...

I'm sure DD2 knows when she has me to herself as she always feeds all afternoon if DD1 isn't here! It never happens when I'm looking after the 2 of them, but is does ruin all my plans to catch up on the housework.

It sounds like you're doing great. The most important thing is to trust your body and the baby that they know what they're doing.

Keep on keeping on sounds a good mantra to me :)

4 weeks is still so little, she will get there. And you can only do what you can, so if you have the afternoon just the two of you and she just wants to feed then go with it, because as you say there will be times when you can't.
Have you given a sling any thought? If you get one of the ones with a pouch then the baby can feed in there and at least you've got your arms free to hold a book to read to DS, or get him a drink or a snack or whatever.

You are doing so well, and it will get easier :)

Thanks Alibaba

After an awful evening of crying and rooting and then feeding for a few mins then squirming and crying again, DD fed beautifully about 10pm, then slept til 3.30! then again til 6.15 - feel new woman. She seems much more settled today, and I've decided to work on the basis that the squirming is when she isn't really particularly hungry and is peeved about lots of milk flowing into her face rather than a good old comfort suck. (I do have a lot of milk.) So I'm not going to persevere with trying to latch her on when she's in a mood, but try and find other ways of comforting her.

She's very perky this morning, DS and I are convinced she was smiling on purpose at us when she woke up!

I'm not really after any replies, just sort of recording my progress. KEEP ON KEEPING ON KEEP ON KEEPING ON ...

My ds squirms and looks uncomfortable at some feeds too. I read on MN to try taking him off and burping him - often it is a big burp waiting to come out and he seems happier afterwards.

Sometimes dd2 squirms too. She's 14w now and does it less. I think at times she was just wanting a comfort suck and was getting drowned in milk from my fast let down. You're doing great and it will get easier.

I only fed ds to 3 weeks and when feeding dd1 I felt a lot better to have that milestone behind me. Maybe you will find it easier to relax in a couple of weeks when you can be certain it's gone better than last time.

Just thought I'd update. We're still going strong at 5 weeks, poor DD has a nasty cold and snorting away struggling to latch on yesterday. I went to the doctor with her just to be sure it wasn't anything more serious, and the doctor advised me to top her up with cooled boiled water between feeds and to cut down dairy. I've not done either of these things as according to KellyMom it is quite dumb advice - I did express a little bit (gratifyingly creamy!) just in case DD's blocked nose really made it impossible for her to feed, but I haven't needed to use it. She's vomited copiously a few times, which the doc seemed to think was likely just mucus - I am hoping this is the case and that it will settle down.

DD's current (annoying but not worrying I don't think) pattern is to snack a lot for about 2 hours - ie on and off the breast, latching for a few mins, off for a few mins, and again for a while, then napping for quite a long time, then cycle begins. Evenings are quite grim as she's also tetchy and therefore grouchy about latching, also my breasts seem less "full" of an evening which I think annoys her. Then at some point in the evenin, usually some time between 9 and 10, she'll suddenly latch nicely and feed for about 10 mins, then fall asleep for up to 5 hours (only 3 last night, but previously it has been as much as 5.5 hours!).

Again, I'm not really after any replies, just recording my progress. I am hoping the snacking will get less as she gets bigger and more interested in actually doing things in between feeding and napping, but if this is how it is for a few weeks, I can handle it...

If a blocked nose is keeping her from feeding, you can get a little suctiony thing to clear out her nose or (I think?) use saline solution.

If you think a strong letdown is making her splutter and unnerving her, you can try 'uphill' feeding - basically try to ensure the milk is going uphill into her rather than downhill, so gravity reduces your letdown.

Thanks - i think the blocked nose is on the way out now. She was able to feed in little bits yesterday, and today is much improved. I will try the uphill feedig as well, but I do struggle with the latch in any position other than cross-cradle. I've tried the rugby ball with a bit of success as well, but uphill feeding might be beyond me just yet!

Well done you for checking kellymom - that is shocking advice from the GP! Sounds like you're doing the right thing :)

Took me ages to get to grips with different positions but it will get easier as DD gets bigger and the feeds are more settled.

What stupid advice from the GP, why would giving her water be a good idea?