Never Offer Never Refuse - does it work?

[weddingseason]

Time to start winding down BF for 16 month old DS. Huge battle ahead because he co sleeps and feeds to sleep. Current strategy is to feed to sleep then for DH to deal with night times but all this seems to mean is that he then wants to feed quite desperately all day.

Am hoping he'll get used to the new night time state of affairs and not be quite so keen to feed all day but does anyone have any success stories with 'Never Offer, Never Refuse' or can tell me how long it took their children to lose interest?

My DD is two next month, sleeps with me, feeds or latches on several times a night and is not showing any signs of giving up!.... its messing with her sleep now though, she has been waking up in the morning tired and her afternoon naps are getting longer and longer so its time to stop I think. My plan is to buy her a new little bed (she can climb out of her cot now anyway) and just cuddle her when she wakes, and try giving a cup with water. Its going to a complete nightmare I know, she sometimes gets pretty angry in the night if I don't let her latch on... yikes...being bossed around by a 2 year old :-)... thing is, I do like feeding her, but I have not slept all night with her dad for all this time, and my nipples are finally getting feed up with all the sucking! I think the main thing with stopping is to be absolutely sure you want to stop, pick a date, pick a routine, grit her teeth, be massively patient and go for it! :-)

I stopped feeding DD1 at night when she was two. I explained to her that once she had gone to bed there would be no more booby in the night until the morning. We had some tears, she did get upset a couple of times, but within a few nights the answer "it's not morning yet" was enough to make her turn over and go back to sleep by herself.

I think 16 months may be a little young to understand this kind of explanation, so may be go for gentle distraction for now, if he still insists he wants to nurse then go with it, if he's easily distracted then he didn't want it that much. Thats how I cut down our feeds in the day time. It was a kind of don't offer, don't refuse, but with distraction thrown in to reduce the frequency. We are now just nursing to sleep and first thing in the morning, which is no problem at all and doesn't disrupt daily life, but still gives DD the comfort she needs.

Thanks - am hoping that once our groups etc. start up again in September it'll be easier to distract. Am definitely ready to give up BF - would be nice to get my evenings back if nothing else and have also had enough of the writhing/pinching/biting that accompanies feeding these days. Oh to have a snuggly newborn to feed again!