low/no milk supply, please help

[PearlyDewdrop]

Hi,

Newbie here having a dreadful time. Ds was born 3 days ago and has cried endlessly since. We suffered a traumatic back to back birth, I have been awake for 6 days straight now and seem to have a terribly low supply of milk. DH has gone out and bought formula/bottle/sterilizer, he is concerned that ds is hungry.

I desperately wish to breastfeed, but it seems that I am already failing the first test of motherhood.

One would welcome any advice from those of you who have experience breastfeeding your little ones.

Thank you.

Ds has had tiny little naps, eyes still open but experiencing r.e.m - during his brief feeds. He is as you say completely wound up. To acquire a latch takes almost an hour. If he falls asleep whislt dh carries him, he wakens immediately upon being placed in his basket. I will draw the curtains, dim the lighting immediately and turn on the radio very, very low. Thank you

lots of babies at that age refuse to sleep anywhere but in someone's arms - that's what the sling is good for! It's soul destroying when you put a sleeping newborn down and they wake up - so don't do it! Get DH to carry him or settle on the sofa holding him so you can both sleep. Or get a car seat that rocks on the ground and try to get him off to sleep in that. Try co-sleeping. DS was a difficult feeder and a fussy sleeper so I sympathise. The sling and car seat helped a lot, as did co-sleeping. DS got the hang of latching on on day 10 IIRC, it will happen if you persevere...

I'd suggest you let him sleep on you in the day while you sit and rest and don't put him down -to let him catch up on sleep! Also consider swaddling - mothercare do a miracle swaddle blanket which is great.

After he's asleep in your arms, try latching him on then. He should hopefully root around and even if he wakes, hopefully he'll remain drowsy enough and instinct will take over making it easier for him to latch on. Make sure his nose is lined up with your nipple and his tummy is facing you so he's on his side and not twisting his head to reach your boob (not facing upwards which is the mistake I used to make).

Thank you EricNorthmansmistress a sling sounds like just the piece of kit for us, we shall buy one. I must admit co-sleeping scares me, just a few years ago my SIL suffered a cot death with her dd, so we are reluctant to do anything which may increase the risk. But the tiredness is torture. Even dh is barely getting any rest.

Perhaps though once I begin to rest again ... two or so hours sleep in now 7 days, I hardly feel like I can keep going. Dh is being wonderful, he roasted a chicken for dinner today, we have been neglecting ourselves, the days and nights have felt like one huge crisis.

pearl try and sit down as much as you can. let DS sleep on you - you can keep watch on him while you doze. You'll be amazed at just how aware of him you are. Forget cooking - your family and friends should be bringing over cooked stuff which you can reheat in the microwave!

I remember the crisis feeling. We used to buy a lot of decent ready-meals and I ate a lot of porridge and drank loads of hot chocolate.

Thank you very much all, you have been so helpful, I get the impression from everyone that the problem may be that I have not been eating and drinking enough compounded with sleep deprivation. What hope did one have really? But thanks to you other Mums out there, I am beginning to feel optimistic that if I remedy these three things, with luck there may be light at the end of the tunnel.

I am still desperate to establish breastfeeding but I am going to stop being so hard on myself.

I will left you all know how we get on

Just a thought, oats have been mentioned twice now! Any other food/drink recommendations that are known to aid with producing breastmilk?

Thank you

fenugreek, you can buy it in tablet form. But at day 3 I wouldn't worry about quantity, it's about getting him latched and feeding, so the advice you have been given is great. It's hard, and if you go the route of expressing while you work on the latch you might feel like you are doing nothing but try to feed and try to express! However it's important to try to keep up supply even while DS is still learning to latch on. I remember how stressful and crisis like it seems at that time - plus the baby blues may hit around now which will make things seem harder, but it's just hormones/tiredness and will pass!

pearl - I am going to be very directive, to you and to others on this thread :)

You don't need to worry about your eating and drinking - and please, people, stop suggesting the OP drinks and eats more or eats certain things. Her baby is day 4. There is no reason for her to worry about her milk supply at this stage - the concern is getting the milk/colostrum into the baby. Eating and drinking more has no effect on milk supply - individual experiences may suggest a link, and same goes for special food, but the evidence is clear: no effect.

pearl - you and your baby need real life support, from someone qualified who can see what is happening and can explain things. The comment from the midwife in hosp. is scandalous and cruel and misinformed - yet it is nagging away at you, and has also influenced your DH...so you need (IMO) to see an informed, sensitive midwife who can make bf better for you.

I hope you find someone - the internet and talk boards are great for sympathy and fellow-feeling, but it can only go so far to make things better.

GO. TO. BED.

With baby, snuggle him up and doze both of you. The lying down feed will save your sanity.

Sling is also great, I use a hugabub. Teeny babies don't like to be put down, so don't put him down!

Sorry I suggested porridge because its easy to make in the microwave and keeps you full for longer - which is what I needed in the early days when little time to eat properly! I found that was key to keeping my strength up when I was getting so little sleep. If I didn't eat properly I felt awful.

Quite right tiktok, I think that needed to be said.

Pearl- try and get some rest- tomorrow will be a better day.

Porridge is a great food - easy to make and nice to eat :)

Just to clarify - iggly, I know you were not suggesting that porridge is good for bf. But the OP is certainly thinking that her diet and fluid intake is relevant to her bf struggle, and it really isn't, as far as I can see :(

My first child (a daughter) was born after a very long labour, she was back to back and required forceps. She actually had bruising on her head and cried lots and lots in the early days. I honestly believe she had a storming headache quite frankly. I also saw a McTimoney Chiropractor who very gently re-aligned her and after that session she was a much more happy bunny and was more comfortable feeding as well. Prior to my McTimoney appointment she only seemed comfy to feed lying down with me on a bed.

Btw I doubted my milk supply with my DD as my first born and was rather daft. I wish I had known about mumsnet when she was a baby. Tiktok is fantastic and other mumsnetters

You sound like such a loving mum, congratulations on your lovely baby. Things will get better x

Pearl congrats on your baby .

You've had great advice - as tiktok says there's no need to worry about supply or eating specific things or anything. It's still such early days for you and you're doing brilliantly. My milk didn't come in until day 4 or 5 but the colostrum is just what your baby needs. And his tummy is tiny so he doesn't need oz and oz of milk. Just little and often and he'll be fine. Ignore what that midwife said and please do try and find some RL support, either from the community midwife or from a BFing counsellor or lactation consultant (there should be groups available to you locally). You could also try the NCT or La Leche League or Breastfeeding Network helpline numbers.

I just want to reassure you that the early days are crazy - the sleep deprivation is terrible, so please do let your DH wait on your hand and foot and snatch any opportunity to sleep.

The tip on using a sling is a great one (our babies love to be carried, the closeness, the safety). On the sling front, I really loved my Close sling - it got both me and my baby a lot of rest in the early weeks as DS could snuggle up on my chest (or on DH's chest) and would drop off to sleep. It's got none of the safety issues you may have heard about with the pouch slings and is widely available (eg in John Lewis or Mothercare).

I find feeding lying down also helped my baby to both feed and sleep in the early weeks. I understand your concerns after your SIL's awful experience but you can still feed lying down without co-sleeping (eg try it during the day) - there are some good threads on feeding lying down on MN, such as this one. I personally do co-sleep, but we have a sidecar cot (a babybay and follow the guidelines on safe co-sleeping.

Anyway, sorry to ramble on. It does get a lot easier. My own son is now 20 weeks and asleep in his cot (despite me spending the first two weeks entirely convinced my son would never sleep anywhere but on my chest!).

I also had no sleep for the first 3 days ! Luckily for me one of the ward midwives showed me how to bf lying down ! I was also nervous about co - sleeping and still am but have done it just to some sleep and baby is able to feed easily at night. We have had a lot problems bf ie Tongue tie but am still ebf at 3 months . Slings are also excellant !Go to bed with baby and Have lots of chocolate on supply .

lovely lady
agree with tiktok about milk supply but if you're not eating and drinking properly it may be adding to your exhaustion and general outlook on life, so if DH can get more chickens in the oven or porridge in your bowl go for it.
I also had a terrible time feeding DD, the sleeplessness and latch/supply/weight problems were awful. For me co-sleeping, feeding lying down and slings made the difference between 3 hours sleep and no sleep, that allowed me to be able to just about function. You and your LO will get through this. DD is 2 and half now, don't know how we got here, but we did, and you and DS will too xxx

Pearl if you are worried about co-sleeping, I can't recommend a sidecar cot enough. If money is tight you may find that you can convert a normal cot or cotbed. You just need to try it with one side comletely removed to check it is sturdy like that, then move the mattress over to cover the gap and stuff some tightly rolled up towels down the far side to keep it in place.

The risks quoted about co-sleeping include unsafe co-sleeing practices such as sofa sharing or bedsharing where a parent had drunk alcohol. There won't ever be another study now as cot death rates are so low overall (thankfully!) so it will always remain a mystery, but a lot of people think that safe co-sleeping is as safe or maybe even slightly safer than cot sleeping due to the fact you are more aware of your baby.

Hang in there, I hope you find some support soon :)

One is absolutely over the moon ones milks has come in!!!!!!

Although our latch is now even worse than ever due to extremely painful engorgement but we have a breast-feeding counsellor coming to our home tomorrow. She happens to have a wealth of experience both being a counsellor and a Mum of 4 little ones herself, all of whom she has breastfed.

In fact she is bringing a little one she is currently breastfeeding, one is so excited!!

We have an appointment with a cranial osteopath this afternoon, luckily close to home, so one must rush, just time to read over the above as one was just so excited to post about my milk one has not read it yet.

dreading this appointment

One apologizes that one does not have the time to answer individual posts at the present.

Igglybuff given what a help you have been one is appalled that you felt the need to apologize for suggesting one eats a bowl of porridge.

One really feels that this forum is a fantastic life line to all new Mums and indeed Fathers, nothing must hinder the exchange of information gathered by our real life experiences.

Thank you all

Great news about milk coming in, pearl :) Hope things continue to get better.

(I did not mean that iggly had to apologise, BTW, and I am sure she's clear about what I was meaning...you and anyone else reading this needed to know that in your case, bf success was irrelevant to your diet :) )

Great news about your milk Pearl and good that you have some help coming tomorrow.

Try hand expressing a little bit to reduce the engorgement see below
www.kellymom.com/bf/concerns/mom/engorgement.html

Don't worry about replying to every post, we all know how busy and tired you are.

Don't worry about the c osteopath appt either- sometimes babies that have had a tricky birth just need a little readjustment.

Great news pearl! That's fab. Good luck with the cranial osteopath appointment :)

I didn't think tiktok was directing her comments at me - but as she says, for anyone else reading the thread, I didn't want them to think I meant porridge = more milk. The apology was for anyone else reading really.

That's great, Pearl, hope the breastfeeding counsellor is helpful :)