help milk not come in yet

[emmylou157]

Hi,
I gave birth 4 days ago and have been breastfeeding exclusively since birth. Today baby has been really unsettled and hungry all the time, she has stopped weeing and pooing as much - only once today and has had crystals in her nappy which the breastfeeding info I have suggests she is not feeding enough.

My milk has not come in yet and I was wondering when others milk has come in. Have had to resort to cup feeding small amopunts of formula tonight after attempting breastfeeding as too worried about her being hungry and getting dehydrated. I am really keen to keep breastfeeding and am getting her to suckle from each breast for as long as she will before topping her up with the formula.

Has anyone else had this problem? It is really upsetting me as feel I am letting her down.

Thanks

Fine, seashore - but why 'still disagree' with years of research, many, many in-vivo studies, detailed knowledge of biology and physiology, evolution, anthropology which underlines the lack of any relationship between diet, fluid and rest and enhanced breastfeeding? Ok, you've had two entire babies? And your experience wipes out anything the research can tell you?

I already said that individual experience can vary and it may well be that individuals feel they observe a link.

But generally speaking, mothers are helped far more by good information about how to support their own breastfeeding, than poor information that at worst is an irrelevance and at best puts pointless pressure on them.

I used to think the food and drink thing made a difference and worried about it with DS1. Then the lovely tiktok put me straight on here and I haven't given it a second thought with DS2, hasn't made a spot of difference.

I get hungry and thirsty more often when breastfeeding but I assume that is because my body wants to replace its own fluids and fat stores no difference with milk and indeed I seem to have a lot more milk this time around then I did with DS1 which is probably down to DS2 being a total milk monster.

OP has your milk come in yet?

Well tiktok, I see why posters so often state - I'm no expert but . . . so often on the bfing threads, I too will in future do that before I post anything. Thank you so much for setting me straight.

To answer why I disagree - it depends on what way you look at it, bfing is very demanding,to suggest rest/eat/drink is certainly not putting a pointless pressure, to do pretty much anything in life which may be a bit demanding it is advisable to rest/drink/eat.

This is not an expert website, this is a parenting forum for mothers/fathers to share their experiences so therefore I answered the op's question as to when my milk came in and how I went about bfing.

seashore, it's absolutely fine to share personal experiences on here. That's why we're all here after all, trying to help each other out.

But there's a big difference between sharing your experiences and making sweeping statements, implying they are fact.

You say "if you are not drinking fluids, eating good protein, your body won't produce fluids/milk". This is simply not true and when bfing rates are still so woeful and there are still so many myths flying about, it's right that good, factual information is given alongside anecdotal experience.

Sometimes research and common sense make awkward bedfellows and experiences shows that research doesn't have the longevity of common sense. Hence why not so long ago bfing was simply learnt by being around other bfing mothers and word of mouth.

It's funny too that now in a time of more research there is less bfing.

The reasons for low bfing rates are various but it's nothing to do with lack of common sense or too much research. The word of mouth to which you refer is the same word of mouth that has all of the grandparents in my family thinking that after 3 months, bfing is abnormal and dangerous. They certainly know nothing of research.

What you have to be careful of is undermining a bfing relationship. Say I'm bfing a little baby and they're fussing a bit during a growth spurt or cluster feeding, as is the norm for many babies. I also happen to have a tummy bug and can't keep food down well and have no appetite. Then I read your assertion that it's not possible to make milk if you aren't eating/drinking/resting enough. What if I then make the connection between my child's cluster feeding/fussiness and my inability to eat for 48hrs? And I give formula because obviously I'm not producing enough milk? And the formula interferes with my supply for real?

Women need to be supported to understand what is happening and helped to make choices based on this by somebody who is qualified to comment on the factual basis of bfing.

I offer anecdotal experience (like my dd preferred the rugby hold on her second favourite breast and fed better in that position) but I never make sweeping statements about bfing unless I know they're true.

The word of mouth I am referring to is not present times, it is when bfing was the norm.

Obviously when anyone is saying something, they mean - in general, ie. not when you happen to have a stomach bug. The op here did not have a stomach bug.

I don't get it, I just don't see that it is hard or a pressure to do what you have to do to just be alive - eat/rest/sleep.

I compeletely believ in bfing and I would never offer any advice to do anything other then help the mother becomes more comfortable whilst doing it.

OK, seashore, you don't get it. But for many women, understanding the real mechanisms for low milk supply or their baby's behaviour or slow weight gain or whatever have nothing to do with eating, sleeping and resting is helpful. It means they can focus on whatever really is causing the problem...and not be anxious that something they are not doing vis a vis their own lifestyle is impacting on their baby's health.

Parenting forums like this share experience and that is very valuable. But you cannot extrapolate from your own experience of breastfeeding 2 babies to make a generalisation as you did in your posts.

There is no reason for you to take offence at this.

Well actually I have found the tone here consistently condescending, and I do find that offensive.

When I made my posts earlier, I was offering what I know from the advice given to me face to face by medical professionals whilst in hospital, and by my mw and visiting nurse etc.I find it is hard to be swayed just like that by a few random posts here.

It in fact renders this whole website null and void if you cannot exprapolate from your own experience.

I'm off to bf ds now, hope I can manage!

'Null and void' because some people point out that because one mother has an experience, this does not mean she can generalise from it?? And you take offence at this?

You share stuff that you have been told by medical professionals. One of the points of this thread is that they (gasp) don't always get everything right.

And no one is asking you to be swayed by a few random web postings....of course that would be ridiculous, almost as ridiculous as generalising out of one's own experience I (and others) pointed out that research into many 100s of experiences plus other knowledge indicates something different. Setting your own experience up as a trump card over all of that is going to get you challenged on mumsnet, for sure.