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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Friend says she would like to breastfeed, but ...

8 replies

FrozenNorth · 29/07/2010 19:05

... she has explained to me that since the midwives will show her how to do it in the hospital, she does not want to find out how to latch or read any info about it beforehand.

She attempted to bf her first child but it did not work out for them. She says that she did not receive enough support in the hospital for it to work.

I know how bad she felt about stopping bfing her first and I would love to support her to make the decision right for her upon the arrival of the new baby because she's a lovely person and close friend. I worry that she may be expecting too much of the midwives etc. purely because, in my experience, they can be very busy and sometimes some prior knowledge of latching, frequent feeding being normal etc. can be useful in these circumstances. I'd love to suggest this to her but I don't want to pressure her or come off as a breastfeeding Nazi. I should just keep my mouth shut shouldn't I?

(please don't flame me - I'm not judging her in any way, just wondering if it would be an appropriate suggestion)

OP posts:
moaningminniewhingesagain · 29/07/2010 19:09

Lots of the baby cafe's and breastfeeding drops actively welcome pregnant women, you could suggest she pops in to one to meet people and they could lead her a bit, if she wants.

Otherwise, I think you will just have to keep your own counsel and be ready to support her when she wants or needs it.

nagoo · 29/07/2010 19:14

I didn't really know how do it, and I can't remember anything anyone said to me in the hospital (but I did get out of there 4 hours aftr giving birth )

I think I read the leaflets they gave me, and there were diagrams in books. This p0g I have been given a lot of bumf about bfing, with pictures and stuff, and there's a bump to breast dvd as well.

I found that the mw helped me during home visits, making sure he was latched properly etc.

Greedygirl · 29/07/2010 21:48

I didn't find anything out about breastfeeding before having my DS, not sure why as I was obsessive about every other aspect! Anyway, I persevered and got the support I needed and I found the NHS leaflets etc. really useful but I also found it really, really encouraging having friends and family who had breast fed and saw it as normal so just by being someone she can talk to,if needed, you are doing your bit I think.

StealthPolarBear · 29/07/2010 21:50

is she going to UHND? I did find them quite good there - not sure what you thought?
Also the PN midwives (assuming she gets out fairly quickly) were quite good.

StealthPolarBear · 29/07/2010 21:53

Actually...would she come to one of our meetups?

Haliborange · 29/07/2010 21:53

There is probably someone at the hospital who is responsible for helping mums breastfeed. You could find out the name and phone number for her, and pass it on so she can call them if she feels she needs extra help. That might be quite a gentle way of supporting her.

StealthPolarBear · 29/07/2010 21:54

There is...she is off on long term sick and has been since January, if I have the right hospital!

MoonFaceMama · 30/07/2010 09:05

ime midwives were very busy. I was able to sort myself out but a friend of mine had issues and found the pn midwives, though being able to visit a lot, gave differing advice. She ended up confused and doubting her ability, and yes you've guessed it, ff and is sad about it to this day. I think one of the problems is that, as is often stated on here, midwives aren't the experts when it comes to bf. I woul try and explain this to her and, if she won't go to a bf cafe, make sure she has all the numbers etc (or at least that you do and can be on hand with them!) so she can get hold of a bf councillor asap if needed.
Good luck. You are a good friend.

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