I have realised I don't know the mechanics of winding up the breastfeeding

[heylottie]

I go back to work next week, for three days a week. DD is 9 months old and is breastfed (never thought I would get this far but that's another story!)

I thought I would have stopped by now but as time crept on so did the breastfeeding.

I think now that I would like to keep the morning and evening feed if possible until 12months, although I may have to go away for work so that may not be possible.

So my questions are these!!

If she has a bottle of formula during the day at nursery when I am at work, should I give her a bottle during the day when she is with me? What will happen to my supply if I do/don't?

At the moment she is sleeping through the night. So I feed her at 7pm and then I express when I go to bed, mainly for boob comfort. But this is maintaining a supply I don't need, right? I don't really want to spend my evenings expressing for her to take to nursery after a day at work and a 60 mile commute. So am I right in thinking I should stop expressing to regulate my supply?

A friend has been told to wind down the amount of milk she is giving her son, that it should be mostly water during the day now. He is a big boy - but when are you supposed to swap milk for water etc?

I think I should know this. And realise that I don't. Any help gratefully received!!!

Oh, I don't know the answers but am marking my place - DS is 9mo too and I was wondering some of these things myself

you don't need to swap milk for water! milk should be their main source of nutrition until they're at least a year old

she is probably going to be fine at nursery with just solids and water/juice to drink. then just breastfeed around it. you can breastfeed more frequently on days off, your supply will regulate itself fine

you can def cut out the expressing if you have no need for the milk. i would maybe cut it down gradually tho

I was in roughly the same spot a few months ago. I had to go back to work full time when DS was 8 months, so was expressing at work and at night to get enough for two bottles a day at nursery.

By about 9 months we'd got down to 1 big bottle, and then just after 10 months we tried dropping the bottle altogether and haven't looked back. At that point he was getting better with his cup so was taking in more water while at nursery.

I was still expressing at work for comfort but realised my body would never get used to just morning and evening feeds if I kept doing that, so about 2 weeks ago I stopped expressing. So far, so good.

The weekends are a bit different. DS still wants to feed during the day when I'm around, but it hasn't caused problems. He probably eats a bit less solid food on the weekend and makes it up in milk. I haven't noticed I'm extra-full or anything today, so I can say it's possible to do it that way!

If you are going away for work, maybe you could pump morning and evening in a hotel room just to keep things going? DD could have formula or thawed breastmilk on those days?

I think the problem is these things vary between people.

In my case...

DS1 - from 6 months I fed him morning and night, and expressed an extra bottle's worth in the morning for him to have while I was at work.

DS2 - from 6 months I fed him morning and night and he (momstly) had formula during the day when I was at work, or I fed him when he was with me. I had no problem this day-to-day variation in demand, but I know others who found this difficult

in both cases I continued with just one feed for ages after about 1 year. Again, while this was fine for me, I know people who really struggled to keep the supply going when the demand was so low.

In your sitation I would definitely continue with the morning and night feed. If you plan on formula at nursery I think you could try giving the extra feeds on 'your' daysand just see how it goes. To be honest with ds1 it didn't occur to me that I could even try this, but it did work fine with ds2.

Hi Heylottie

I went back to work full-time last year when DD was 10 months old and fully breastfed. She absolutely refused a bottle of any kind - EBM, cow's milk or formula!

In the end, the nursery and I gave up on the milk and DD just kept to morning and night feeds (usually jumping on me when I got home...) and we made sure she had plenty of yoghurt and cheese and cow's milk with cereal once she was one. She always has plenty of water and diluted fruit juice now that she is older (nearly 22 months).

She's absolutely fine and we've never looked back. Still breastfeeding morning and night, sometimes more at weekends, but she's had no problems. She was still nightfeeding when I went back to work and we had to do a bit of sleep training when she was about 14 months as I just couldn't cope with the waking in the night any more, but it was only a week or so before she settled down.

Your supply does adjust. I tried to express at work but it was too stressful and I hardly got anything out, not that she would have drunk it anyway. Sometimes I felt a bit engorged in the early weeks but it settled down really quickly.

I'm sure that your DD will be fine. It might be an idea to do a bit of expressing at first, but then see how it goes. It is surprising how easily your body settles into a new routine.

(nb. my niece and nephew were the same, didn't want any milk except for mum's...)

Ah yes - thank you all - this now seems quite logical. I suppose you just have to trust your body to regulate perfectly just what you need.
Interesting about maybe not giving her milk at nursery... Having always fed on demand I have had worries that sips from cups and beakers won't be enough and she will dehydrate... but I guess two big milk feeds a day may be enough?
Next week is going to be fun!!!

fwiw...
if she is happy to take formula, then I would send this to nursery even if you think she can do without. I'd say 'first week at nursery' is not a good week to also start cutting down her milk.

leave that til the week after

Yeah could she have a couple of cups of formula in her day at nursery? They start by only taking a few sips and build up the quantity they drink over time. The main thing for nursery to be aware of is that she needs have access to the drink for at least an hour to give aple time for her to return to it as she plays.

Do you want to give up day feeding completely?

DS took his time getting used to using the cup, but the nursery was very good about keeping it around with water in it even when he was having the bottles, just so he'd get used to it (and we tried with him at home). I'd say it was about 1.5 months before he'd reliably drink a decent amount out of it and not just fling it around.

I think you'll just have to see how it goes. Cut out the expressing and feed her in the morning and evening. Get the nursery to offer her formula during the day (maybe one bottle enough at 8 months?) - I would send in both a bottle and two cups (one to be full of water and the other they can try the milk in) on the first day.

I think it would vary person to person but I think if it were me I could probably manage 3 feeds on non working days eg 7am 2pm and 6pm) and 2 feeds on working days 7am and 6pm - the 6pm feed would obviously be bigger on the working day. I think if it was more than 3 feeds on a non working day I'd get engorged at work so would have to pump etc.

Definitely agree about the cup. My DS2 has never had a bottle (I did try!) so used to have expressed milk from a cup from a very early age.

Both my boys have just adjusted their feeding according to my availability. The older one continued breastfeeding during my year of working full-time, and used to feed morning and night. When I went on maternity leave with DS2 he upped his feeding considerably.

So I can't really answer you as I've yet to wind up the breastfeeding since starting in 2006. I'm taking the self-weaning approach and it is working incredibly well for us.

Have read this with interest as my EBF 8 month old has reduced her feeding from me during the day recently. Think she has sort of self weaned herself as I haven't been engorged and she hasn't missed it at all!

She's not huge so have been offering her follow-on milk from a cup throughout the day. I am breastfeeding her when she wakes and before she sleeps (plus usually once in the night). At the moment she takes about 6 or 7 oz total throughout the day from cup. Doesn't seem much but guess that's okay? she has water with her meals.

I was concerned that she doesn't sit and have a feed as such. She will have a little sip (ounce or 2 maybe) then wander off to play (has just started crawling), then return for more later. But, having read your comment bumbums it sounds like this is okay.