19 mo still on the bottle

[mumtojohn]

My 19 mo is still having formula; Cow and Gate 3 (not cow's milk - we tried it at 12 months and he hit the roof til we went back).

He is still having it from the bottle, 3 times a day (although also eats well at mealtimes).

Myself and my husband work full time (although I am having dc2 in November, thank God, so I will be off for a year again and no more full time work for me ever again!) and so we've gone with what works and keeps us all happy since I went back to work, for the easiest life. I've known for some time that I really 'shouldn't' be using a bottle still, or giving him milk in the arvo, or giving him formula, but our appetite for pushing through unpopular changes has been limited given our working situations (ds is in full time nursery and loves it - obv I will drop him down to minimum days when I am off again).

But I met up with all my old nct mums Friday and they were quite shocked that ds is still on bottles, formula, 3 times a day etc. Part of me thought 'easy for you to keep up with what the books tell you to do - you're at home all day!' but I did feel a bit of a crap Mummy, doing the easy thing, and so started with a cup this weekend.

Although it was tolerated in the arvo (and we should drop this feed anyway I guess) he wouldn't have a bar of it in the evening and morning.

Anyone got any tips for getting off the bottle, or any recommendations on good cups for coming off? He is great with water in cups and even drinks his water from a normal cup without spilling a drop.

Are there any other mums out there who are still bottle and formula-ing, to make me feel less guilty?

Not formula, but still on bottles at almost 20 mo. She too drinks water from an open cup quite competently, so I think we'll probably just skip the sippy cup stage. We tried it, she doesn't like it, it's just not a big deal to me. It wasn't so long ago that she was a baby, and nobody expects breastfeeders to express into a sippy after a year, do they?

i stopped boobie feeding my son when he was around six months and he went onto formula. i knew that at 12 months i would get rid of bottles so i immediatley started introducing a cup, by substituting the bottle with a cup for 1 of the feeds a day (i usually gave him the cup with one of his favourite snacks/ meals as to not to upset him to much. it was through this that i found that my little boy liked sports bottle style tops. as soon as he turned 1 i binned all bottles and formula (as he is old enough for cows milk) and that was that, i just thought he can't have what we haven't got. there were a few days of tears but he came round and now all is fine.
not really sure if any of this is of any help xx

My 20 month old twins still have a bottle morning and night...cows milk though not formula...

Not sure what you think is wrong with it? Is it the formula or bottle thing? Or both?

My eldest was on morning and night bottles until past 3. I have always found that it helps with the bedtime routine, and also gets something into them first thing in the morning whilst I sort everyone out for breakfast.

Or is it just the comments from the other mums? Cos trust me, you do what's right for your children, there's no harm for a while longer!
(although possibly try to get them off it before secondary school )

My 20 month old has one bottle in the pm, to sleep, and one at night. Three during the day is rather a lot and may discourage a good food intake.,

There is a problem with it. It can affect their speech development. HV's recommend dropping the bottle at 12months. I would go cold turkey with it, but easy for me to say, I know. Maybe you could buy some 'special' cups with a favourite cartoon character on or something to encourage her.

I wouldnt drop the night time one (so long as teeth are brushed afterwards and its drunk fairly quick) but there's no need for him to be having it in the morning or afternoon now and tbh, I would be worried about his teeth and speech, teeth more so I think.

It'll be hard but these things always are and imo it'd be easier to ride it out now that when the new wee one arrives and you're knackered and before you know it he'll be 3 and still on 3 bottles a day.

Thanks everyone. It IS partly the comments from the other mums, but also the speech and teeth. His talking is pretty good for his age but I know there can be issues later (pronounciation etc). Part of the issue is that DH wants to leave things as they are as ds is very happy and jolly and developing v well. It's hard to bring in something new if the other person wants to carry on as we are (and when left up to him, does so).

I might try a number of different cups and see how we get on. Also, I could try cow's again.

You can do half and half to wean him gently onto Cow's milk. I did this and it worked quite well - I started with a quarter milk to three quarters formula and gradually dropped the formula quantities over a few weeks until my DS was totally on cow's milk.

Dd had a bottle until she was 3. Her speech is excellent and teeth are good. I tried everything and spent a fortune on different cups. In the end I snipped the top off the bottle so it came out really fast and told her it didn't work anymore because she wasn't a baby. She put it in the bin herself. However she was a bit oldersomight not work for you. In all honesty I don't think he is too old for a bottle but then I would say that!

HVs recommend dropping the bottle at 12months

How does that tally with the WHO recommending breastfeeding until two, then? It's the same sucking/mouth shape mechanism.

We're only talking about three bottles a day, not suckling constantly. And he's drinking water from open cups, so he's using his mouth and tongue and muscles properly in that regard and they're getting strengthened appropriately. How could that affect speech development?

I'm not being snarky, I'm interested because mine's on bottles as well.

formula gives all nutriens/vitamins in right proportion
feeding with my kids until they were 24 months each was after my SIL who is a doctor gave advice - very sound and makes sense too

every kid's different - some would refuse milk much earlier some would drink by gallons till they are very old

DD (13 months) is still BF nights and has one/two bottles of cows milk in the day. She does not have any problems with speech or teeth. Try cows milk again if you want to drop formula, he may be ok with it now. I am going to switch soon straight to sports bottle or bottle with straw as DD associates beaker with water only and refuses milk from it.

My DD rejected cows milk at a year so we gradually diluted it eg 6oz formula 1oz cows milk over 7 weeks until it was all cows milk.

Once we had the cows milk sorted I gave morning and after lunch milk (which I stopped at 18 months) from a beaker. Once she was taking these feeds from a beaker (she cut down though from around 8oz in a bottle to 4oz in a beaker) I stopped the bedtime bottle.

Anyway by 18 months they don't really need milk so if he chooses to stop then it doesn't matter.

I used beakers with soft tops so like a halfway transition from a bottle.

re: breastfeeding comments - milk pools in the mouth with a bottle unlike BFing, bottle nnot so bad though if you brush teeth afterwards at bedtime.

OP and others - don't worry about it!

I tried different cups/milks etc but DS liked his Aptamil Toddler Milk in a bottle.

He started refusing it from time to time (especially if we were away or a change in routine).

I just held out until I thought he was old enough and around 2 years old I dropped the morning bottle and then when he was 2.3 he was sick so we didn't give it to him and he was happy with the "you're a big boy now".

My DS will not drink cows milk at home - he has a drink from an open cup at nursery but never at home.

My approach was based on what I believe to be the closest alternative to breastfeeding - so those of you pointing out about WHO recommendations to BF to at least 2 years old - that's the theory I used.

If BF had worked out then I would be BFing him at 2 years therefore my best alternative is formula (not standarf cows milk) and formula from a bottle (plus dummy!).

I think you'd find lots of the "pressure" you are getting would also be there if you were BFing but then it would be pressure to stop that.

Bear in mind the possible speech issues but if there are no problems there then just enjoy this stage - it will naturally come to an end/be easier to end. .

Tortoise - It's a completely different motion of the tongue - with bfing it's peristaltic (undulating waves) and with bottles it's a piston action.

Bottlefeeding can (NOT will/does/always) lead to dental occulusions (overlapping teeth) and changes to the shape of the jaw - V-shaped jaw rather than the U-shaped of a breastfed person.

In a very unscientific study of my 3 DDs the only DD with a V-shaped jaw is DD1 who was mainly (about 95%) bottle fed for 8 weeks then breastfed to 3.6y/o, she also has a lower jaw occlusion and is seeing a speech therapist due to her difficulties saying certain words/sounds.
DD2 is 2.8y/o (breastfeeding) and has very straight teeth, a U-shaped jaw and no speech difficulties. She was ebf to 23 weeks when she started solids and has had maybe 4/5 bottles of milk in her life.
DD3 is 9m/o and was ebf to 26 weeks and has had some bottles due to my being hospitalised but doesn't really know how to drink from them (laps at the milk as it comes out rather than sucks on them). She has 2 teeth so can't comment on how the rest will look yet but her jaw is U-shaped at the moment.

There is a research dentist called Dr Brian Palmer who made it his life's work to research what the different/similar effects on the oral cavity of breastfeeding and bottlefeeding are.

His website makes for fascinating reading but is quite technical! Please heed any warnings given if you click on any of the presentations - some of them do indeed contain cadaver/autopsy slides so not for those of a sensitive disposition.

Obviously this goes with out saying but I'll make myself very clear - bottlefeeding will not definitely make your childs jaw/teeth deviate from the physiological norm but it may lead to changes that do deviate.

Thank you everyone. I feel more relaxed now.

Like the idea of mixing formula with cows and then gradually reducing the formula.

I've ordered some Nuby cups that are a bit of a halfway house (I am told) as I agree that DS associates Tommee Tippee cups and the like with water.

Thanks, TruthSweet, that's interesting.

Good luck - the nuby cups worked for us from around 9 / 10 months (was also using the tommee tippees for water etc) and switchen to cow's milk just before she was 1.