Eton v Radley

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What are your thoughts on both for an extremely bright but quite gentle state school boy on a bursary? I know they’re both excellent schools and loved both of them when we’ve looked around (although we had much more chance to look at Radley). My gut feels that Radley is more gentle but Eton has much better teaching (he’ll get 9s wherever he goes as long as he’s happy). We’re considering the obvious differences (town v country campus, diversity, location etc) but any insights on the invisible stuff like pastoral care, how the boys interact with each other, staff morale etc.

my DS12 is a bit like that, except that he moved from state at 8. He has offers from both E & R.

Main differences - E is more diverse. There will be more international students and more ex-state school kids at E than R, especially in the sixth form. Slightly more celebration of non sporty types. The people who seem to go there from our prep are a) those with lots of OEs in the family and b) the clever who aren’t Asian (the Asian families seem to prefer Harrow and Winchester). The place is vast, and the way it is run, the boys are given huge independence and expected to be very organised and self motivated, kind of like how it is at university. Eg, there’s no set prep routine - boys are just expected to find time to get it done. Some boys - particularly those who have never boarded before - struggle with that.

Radley is more demographically & culturally homogeneous. From our prep, it’s a) children of ORs and b) the sportier boys who head there. I know very academic boys who have done really well there and gone to Oxbridge but it is a smaller school than E and I think its centre of gravity is very slightly further towards sport. There is more structure at R - eg in your first year, you do prep at a set time in the same room as the other shells in your house, with sixth form supervision. You also get to share a kind of mini dorm which means you are never isolated in your room. I think for someone who hasn’t boarded before, R might be more manageable and a bit more supportive? The other key difference is that everyone feeds centrally, all mixed together, so it’s less of an issue if you don’t have soul mates among the 10-11 boys in your year in your social. At E, everyone sits and eats with their house.

BTW the Radley warden is fantastic, very sensible and accessible - I like him much better than the E head man. The teaching is also excellent at Radley - I don’t think that’s an issue.

I hope it’s ok to add to the post. We are also in a similar position, My son is currently in a state school and has offers for Winchester and Eton. @TheCricketers You clearly have a great deal of knowledge of the various boarding schools .Eton seems to offer much more from what I can see but any insights would be very helpful .

@Lolabellas
Winchester was DS12’s first choice. He loved the library, the ancient buildings, the unashamed academia of it all, and the fact rugby isn’t a thing. However I had reservations. I wanted a single sex school, and was also a bit off put at just how international it had become and (not unrelated to that) how STEM-dominated it was. Plus, whatever you think about coed, the introduction of girls has been a big distraction and hasn’t been planned well. School leadership over the last few years has felt very amateurish compared to the ultra professionalism of places like Eton or Wellington. However, there is a new head now (which was much needed) so perhaps things will improve.

In terms of what the schools offer, don’t get distracted/seduced by facilities. I was state educated myself, so I know it’s easy to do. Eton is much bigger than Winchester and has everything that money can buy but I can see how more introverted or ND boys might feel lost or overwhelmed there. Other than basic choices like single sex, day v boarding etc, you need to ask yourself, do I trust the people in charge (especially the housemaster), do I think my DS would respond to them, and would he feel at home with the other boys and able to do his best?

Also, it depends a bit on what kind of state school you are coming from, but for some boys there could be some knowledge catch up to do in things like Latin, French and Maths. It would be worth understanding how each school handles that. Some will put all the state school kids in a class together for the first term or two so they can do a specific catch up programme - some just throw them in the deep end. Children of that age are incredibly adaptable and most want to fit in as quickly as possible. (Don’t be surprised if your son comes home at half term looking and sounding completely different! )

I can’t comment on Radley as I don’t know much about the school but I can speak for Eton.
I consider myself to have grown up financially very lucky and even for me it was a bit jarring moving to an environment like Eton. I grew up in NW London and the vast majority of people I encountered at Eton were all very old money British, with many being from wealthy families from countries like Nigeria and China as well — all the type of families to live in Kensington or big estates in the countryside or even abroad. Eton is very diverse on paper, I think the school was something like 47% White British when I was there — but it still upholds its class reputation. I only recall a few kids I met being from state schools and for me the change in culture was quite suffocating to what I was accustomed to.

I'd echo @TheCricketers assessment. From our prep- where the majority went to E, R and Winch, the basic pattern was- clever international to Winch, clever Brits to E, medium-clever to R. The Radley contingent were mostly early registration boys so only had to be clever enough whereas there would be some v academic boys coming along later from other schools. I think Eton is still more genuinely meritocratic because they deliberately target state school pupils for scholarships and it's perhaps a more urban demographic than Radley. Although class labels are fraught with difficulty. I would say Eton was more UMC with ambitious, driven parents and Radley more UC where parents settled on a school from infancy. With exceptions and cross-overs, there were lots of law/banking/business parents in the Eton cohort but the blue bloods mostly went to Radley (and Harrow).
Eton is vast but it has a large number of Houses, so they are able to give really good pastoral care with small groups per HM and Dame. If I were in your place and looking for an onward move for a very clever state-educated boy I'd probably veer toward Eton. But they are both brilliant schools.

I agree with @Reswallie80. The houses are smaller at E, the pastoral care is excellent. Choose a HM that will see your son through and that you gel with. (Although in our day, they also got to choose you, so you hoped that the feeling was mutual). There are many more options for non sporty boys, it is more meritocratic and the speaking programme which the boys organise is second to none. I was worried you could feel invisible at E, but that was not the case. R is very nice, more gentle and less intellectually challenging. The red trouser brigade at R put me off and everyone seemed to know each other, either having siblings there or having been at prep school together. For those not from that background, like us, it was a tricky start.

You have a very bright boy and he will love the speaking programme, societies, debate programme and the level of teaching at E (as well as the sport, drama, art, charity work etc). The scope to go above and beyond academically is there at E and there are brilliant teachers who not only encourage those struggling but also challenge those capable of going further than the curriculum. The drama, the opportunities for all manner of house activities, sport, drama, music both formal and informal are incredible.

I have had one at R and one at E.

Thank you @Bigfatsquirrel that’s really really helpful.

Hi! Would you mind further explain the part on red trousers please?
We’re a family from Asia. My DS’s English is near native but without much British cultural background, plus not sporty.
We have an offer from Radley and Harrow, and find it very difficult to decide.
As per diversity, Harrow is more ‘international’ while Radley is mainly white British.
Would race be an issue in a public boarding school among teenage boys? My DS is very nice and friendly. He’d try to talk to anyone.
(If any locals could share some insight, that’d be great!)

We haven’t been arranged to a Social yet.
May I know which Social is to avoid for a non-sporty boy? My DS likes drama but doesn’t play an instrument.

Thank you in advance.

Hi.. 'red trouser' is referring to a certain demographic of Brits adoring red chinos. A mass generalisation but often associated with the British upper middle/upper classes. Race is no 'issue' whatsoever at R. Plenty of international pupils but it depends on what you're looking for. If seeking a larger co hort of UK pupils and want DS to be immersed in the culture, rugby, cricket, rowing, with strong drama and music, Radley is more likely to offer that. If you would prefer DS to be surrounded with many more international boys, Harrow will likely offer that, perhaps now, partly at the expense of what it has tradionally been - i.e 'A Very British School' (TV documentary series from 2013). What is it that you are looking for for your DS in a British boading school? If you can give a sense, that may help the guidance. DS also has offers from both H and R so feel free to DM to discuss.

Red trouser brigade is a bit unfair.
It is more county set than hedge fund manager, true, but hedge fund managers are less pleasant and far more cliquey - if they bother turning up at all.

@Natsume firstly, many congratulations to your son on gaining offers from two excellent schools.
I don't think you need to worry about Race being an issue at any of these top schools- they all have significant international presence and teens are much readier to see the character than the passport. The issue highlighted about Radley is that it is beloved by the old, established families who have strong personal networks that aren't always easy to penetrate. These social and familial relationships are present throughout the public school system but perhaps less pronounced in schools that have very high academic selection thresholds. So you have parents who have known each other since childhood when they started boarding at prep school, who have dozens of friends in common and shared frames of reference, who partied together, stayed at each other's houses and dated each other's siblings. People are more interested in who you know than what you are worth. They can be a bit 'identikit', so it's easy to recognise the tribe. Cherry or mustard cords are much loved by wealthy landowners, a demographic particularly to be found at Radley, hence 'Red trouser brigade'. Fwiw it's probably much less of an issue for non-British families.
Harrow has also always attracted the smart set but I'd say it is more international and less 'of the countryside' than Radley, so perhaps a bit easier for non-UK families to navigate.
I can't emphasise enough, though, that these are both excellent schools. The differences are all shading and nuance.

Thank you very much for your detailed response.
About the alumni connection part, wouldn’t that be difficult for international student to befriend with local British students? Or are you talking about it’d be difficult for parents who aren’t in the circle to make friends with other parents at school. Does the established network among parents affect how students make friends at school?

Dear Bigfatsquirrel, I understood from your post that you had one son attending R. and another attending E. How do you compare their chances to be accepted in Oxbridge or an Ivy League University? Do the odds differ greatly?

Thank you for help!

If Oxbridge if your goal then these days the top British schools are to be avoided due to the inverse snobbery applied to Oxbridge applications …
Red trouser brigade is a light hearted view on something deadly serious. Radley touchlines are literally full of tweeedy fathers, Labradors at heel and range rovers parked up. It’s absolutely wonderful if you are part of the set but you won’t crack that social group if you aren’t born into it so don’t expect to. The British class system is alive and well - and more so at R than E/H etc which are genuinely more cosmopolitan (and urban) than R is. All wonderful schools but if I was not born into the red trouser brigade, I wouldn’t be choosing it for my overseas son I’m afraid.

Thank you. We will aim to grasp more about this issue during our visits there.