Genuine question- why boarding school?

[NCTDN]

I'm not being horrible but genuinely intrigued. I never had the option and neither have my children, so clueless.
What are your reasons for choosing going to boarding school rather than a private day school?

What's your agenda asking this question if you aren't and can't consider boarding school for your children and haven't been to one?

Personally we chose it because we are a military family who move house, area and sometimes country at least every 2 years (though the record shortest was a move after 9 weeks!) boarding school provides stability of education and friends for my dc and significantly lowers the stressed placed on them through our lifestyle.

Military or diplomats IME

We live remotely and the only day private school near us is mediocre at best. Child boards and is in heaven. The sports, the friendships, the community. The academics, pastoral etc. Child comes home every 2-3 weekends. Child is living their best life.

My nephew started as a day pupil but asked to switch to weekly boarding as he felt he was missing out socially and because the school day is so long it was almost bedtime by the time he was off the school bus and then he’d have to be up really early the next morning to be back on the bus so there was basically no life at home midweek.

Where I live the boarding school was 1/4 the cost of the private day schools, and academically far far better.

Also it was where DD wanted to go, and turned out to be a place she was very happy for 4 years. I try to listen to what my kids want rather than forcing them into what I believe will be best.

HTH?

We chose a boarding school for our nephew (overseas) because his home life was very difficult, very unstable and sometimes very unsafe. We felt that a different environment would give him the best chance of escaping a very tough start in life.

I wouldn't ever have considered it for my own dd, who came from a stable, happy home.

Oh dear. Sigh..........

It's been about a week since we were all accused of being terrible parents on one thread or another. I guess it was about time this came up again.

Probably the same as anyone else who starts a conversation with "I'm not being horrible but....."

I wonder why you are asking, but I will bite.

Because he really, really, wanted to go.

Because they offer specialist music and sports provision that we couldn’t get closer to home.

Because the nearest private day school would mean getting up at 6am and getting home at 7pm.

Because the nearest state schools were so awful they’re in the press for all the wrong reasons.

Because we are lucky enough to be able to afford it.

Because he’d have got a scholarship / bursary if we couldn’t.

Because in the UK we have an element of choice over schools.

Because we love him dearly and want the best for him and whilst I miss him terribly I know he’s incredibly happy.

Because he knows we love him and he loves us

Because he knows he could leave asap if he wants to

City child who loves horses. Has been asking to board since 8 yrs old. Now 11
Boarding M-F with bus service provided by the school.
Unusual family dynamics due to a SEN sibling.

Well given a lot of posts on boarding schools from people who feel they are morally repugnant I do question the motives of people asking questions with no actual experience. They can get rather nasty.

I looked into weekly boarding when DD was very young. Reasons: I've always been a sole parent, I was commuting, I had zero support and was at the mercy of trains running on time. I paid someone to pick her up at 6.30am, then to school, then someone after school. Quality time midweek was pretty limited.

It would have been a good solution at the time - but in the end I gave up the commute and found a more local job. I'd transferred from overseas back to the UK and came back with my job.

Of the children I know:

One was at a specialist ballet school and is now a professional dancer.
One asked to go to a state boarding school as their school was rapidly going downhill and they were struggling.
Two went to one of the 'name' boarding schools as their existing private day schools were not working out for them as individuals and had minimal music provision which is their particular interest.

I don't even like boarding schools - and for under 11s I think they're a crazy choice - but it must be obvious that there are often reasons why older children may do better in one way or another in a form of specialist school.

@Hoppingabout, I’m agreeing with you 100%

Oh I see! Sorry! See how paranoid they've made me 🤣🤣🤣

A friend did this because she's a single mum with significant health issues and didn't want her DD to become her carer.

There are lots of reasons.

• "home" isn't near the school of choice. Boarding schools are often great academically/sporting/music etc.
• international boarders
• parents move around a lot, so boarding provides stability of education
• parents work long hours or travel with work a lot so being in boarding house has advantages
• the children ask to go. Many love being with their friends and the whole boarding experience.

Because it was impossible for DC to balance out music practice and the demands of an academic London day school. School were so vile about their music (despite knowing that they wanted to be a professional musician) that I feared for their mental health. So they needed to board at a specialist music school.

@tachetastic I'm not here to criticise.
Thank you to everyone for your replies. I've heard of it for military families before. Your answers are really insightful especially about the provision that they offer.
I think because we've never been in any position to consider this, it's never been something I've thought about. I've always thought that if I could afford it, my children would go to a private school. By me there is a lot of choice for that option but I don't know of any that are boarding which is another reason I've never thought about it.

As someone who has never looked into this but admittedly has had negative stereotypes, I found this thread really interesting and insightful to read and have learnt a lot ☺️

I work in a boarding school, but before i joined i had literally no experience of this at all and thought it would be depressing and full of children with abandonment issues....
Not so!
honestly, a boarding school can become a home from home very quickly, is full of activity and staff who really care about the children and give immense support
Weekly boarding is also an option that gives kids time at home at weekends but also structured time in school throughout the week

honestly, if i could ever afford it (which is never going to happen) i would seriously consider it at GCSE/A Level

@sadmillenial Ialso work in a boarding school. Mine used to take boarders from Y7 and I did think they seemed a bit sad and lost sometimes. Now they only take them from Y9 and this seems absolutely fine- lots of them have parents with very wealthy international lifestyles and school gives them stability and to some extent normality and grounding. I agree the staff care for them very well and it's not an unhappy place

When you say military families does that mean both parents? Would a non military spouse go to the place the military one is sent? Genuine question.

Yes. To get the funding for a boarding place now, the non-serving spouse has to move with the serving one. It didn't used to be like this. If you don't want your kids to move school every couple of years, boarding can give them stability.