Stowe

[Barbadosmum]

we are from Barbados, and my 15 yr old boy just got accepted to Stowe for A’s. However, he has some fine motor skill challenges. He’s bright, lovely, sporty, but can’t tie shoes or a tie. Worried he will be bullied at Stowe. What is their reputation?

Did you discuss his needs and possible support before applying?

Be very careful about posting potentially identifying material on here.

Hopefully by A-level most of the students should have grown out of bullying for things like this.

I would imagine most schools would allow velcro fastening shoes to be worn in this scenario even if the policy is to require laced shoes. I see Stowe require leather shows but does not specify laces. However, they do require the school tie to be worn. I don't imagine a clip on version is available.

I don't think you should choose a school because of this, but if it was a big issue you could also consider other schools such as Bryanston, which simply require smart clothes to be worn and do not require a tie at all.

Boys at Stowe are allowed to wear black loafers. If you buy the longest school ties available, put the knots in them for him in advance and leave them loose so he can just put his head in and tighten the knot? And, of course, alert his housemaster to the issue in case he needs help?

OK, why Stowe? I know from other threads on here that the reputation is not great. My friend has moved over from the Cayman islands and her children are in ACS Cobham in boarding. No uniforms and excellent sports.

Maybe look at this instead?

Stowe certainly had a reputation as a party school where anything goes, including (or possibly especially) at sixth form, but I don't know if that is still correct. I am also sure it isn't the only one.

What have you decided to do?

I know some kids who went there, I heard there is a decent amount of bullying

Will decide this week. Just so difficult to know what’s best for him. He wants to go so badly.

Thank you all for your advice and help though. 🙏🏼

@Barbadosmum I don't know what you decided but just wanted to say that I know dozens of children who go to Stowe and many of them have some form of additional need, be it educational, social, physical or emotional. There is bullying like there is at most schools but I don't believe it to be any more likely at Stowe than elsewhere and feel that the school has got a pretty varied, diverse intake (for a public school, that is!) Nearly all the children I know are very happy there. Especially in 6th form. And, unfairly, being sporty will help a lot!