Alternative boarding school to Win Coll?

[Titwillow55]

Deciding on schools to visit for my 10 year old son who seems to be a text book win coll boy. He is academic, quirky, very musical, Aspergers, polite, not a “boys boy”, hates football, likes coding and reading.

we live abroad so looking for full boarding that doesn’t empty out at the weekend and isn’t only Chinese students at weekends like some are. I boarded and loved it. Son is keen to board. Before anyone starts down that route…

he’s not at a prep school so the current school can’t help. We don’t want Eton just due to our own preconceived ideas (!) which is a shame as I know ton is very academic.

any insight into Radley at all? Or Harrow? We’ve been to rugby and it didn’t quite fit the type of boy our son is. Marlborough was too full of flash cash I felt. Thank you for any helpful steers.

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1183934/Four-pupils-face-sex-attack-quiz-public-school.html

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1269768/Teacher-school-probed-police-admitting-I-stood-pupils-foot.html

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-410438/Winchesters-head-English-sixth-compromising-situation.html

https://www.theguardian.com/education/2022/jan/18/winchester-college-christian-forum-society-report-child-abuse

https://www.hampshirechronicle.co.uk/news/20611073.ex-winchester-college-music-director-malcolm-archer-banned-teaching-inappropriate-sexual-behaviour/

Shocking that she is still employed at the school?!

Nothing about Winchester surprises me at this point.

Thank you for taking the time to share these articles @Watchinghercook

Yes,@doglover90 and the music director was also still there when my son was at the school.
He left of his own accord after a decade at the school in 2018.

What kind of people are we to send our wonderful boys to this place? Lack of pastoral care is an understatement. I know exactly how you feel @Portmanteaus2 , I still struggle now.

The new headmaster has recently started to give interviews to the press ,some nonsense about boys ironing shirts. I really wish she wouldn't do that, apparently she knows the school well having taught there in the past.

Are you suggesting that Winchester employed this teacher despite knowing about his past behaviour?

According to the article, he left the school in 2017, was cleared by a jury trial in 2019 of criminal charges relating to incidents in the 1970s at a prep school in a different part of the country, and was then banned from teaching in 2022 after a report to the regulatory authority led them to review the allegations (the article's wording implies that these were the same allegations he was cleared of in the trial, not different incidents).

And before anyone jumps in to suggest that I'm condoning sexual abuse of children - no, I'm not. I'm querying whether Winchester was aware of this staff member's history but deliberately chose to employ him anyway, or whether in fact this only came to light after he had left the school/was the reason for his departure.

If the former, that does appear to be a serious failing on the part of Winchester. If the latter, a quick internet search shows that Winchester is by no means the only UK boarding school to discover after the event that a staff member had been concealing a history of inappropriate sexual behaviour.

Do / Did you have a son at Winchester @Hilmian ? What was your opinion of the oversight and pastoral at the school?
How did they deal.with any concerns that arose during your son's time there?

I think that I have made my opinion of the school perfectly clear.

DS was at Winchester we left before the end of 1st year, the culture of the school became very apparent to us within a few terms. We were so disappointed.

He settled immediately at his new school , his current school is a breath of fresh air in comparison. It's also a boys boarding school so I know that the lack of pastoral care along with all the other concerns is not typical.

I have recommended my son's current school on mumsnet so I have changed my name for this post.

It's clear that you have strong feelings about Winchester @Christmascardigan , and I am very sorry that you and your DS had such a negative experience. I've been in the position of feeling that a school was failing my DC, and it isn't a situation I'd wish on anyone.

But with respect, that wasn't my question. I asked whether you believed, as your post implied, that Winchester deliberately continued to employ a teacher despite knowing while he was still employed there that he had a history of inappropriate sexual behaviour towards children. The linked article didn't include this information, and it is quite a damning allegation to make about the school. There are posters on this thread who are trying to decide whether to apply to Winchester or not; it seems only fair that they should have accurate information about such a serious issue.

Do you think that men like this change @Hilmian ? He was a senior figure at Winchester's for 10 years.

What is your opinion of how Winchester handled the accusations in the other articles? The English teacher is still there today. Have you read all the other articles?

Our family is still suffering due to the decision we made, with all due respect please don't compare my DS's experience to your DC's . It's very insensitive.

@Titwillow55 You should read the thread 'Winchester College or Sherborne' from last year. The overwhelming unhappiness and dissatisfaction of large numbers of Winchester parents is unlike anything I've seen about other schools. It starts off as you would expect but as soon as one parent broke cover it was like a dam bursting.

I'm really horrified by this thread. I was a birthday party today for one of DS's friends at school and while the kids were blasting each other with paintballs the parents got to the usual conversation topics of home improvements, holidays and school choices. Winchester is still on the list for a significant number of parents. It seems like no matter how much they do wrong, a big name and a historic legacy still carries a lot of punch.

Winchester was never on our list for totally different reasons.

Have a look at Oundle. My son is not sporty. They don’t have to play rugby after third form (ie Yr 10 and above) and the boy who showed us around said that the D team were the “circus” team and all they did was run around the pitch being silly whilst letting the serious sporty types do their stuff in the A & B teams. Their Art and DT departments are phenomenal. Well, all of the school, to be honest.

One hour from London and they’re used to organising transport for international boarders.

@CatsEyesintheRoad I was on that thread, explaining why we had chosen to relinquish Winchester places in favour of Sherborne. It drew a really abrasive, aggressive and insulting reaction.

I remember reading your post @Blastosis1 , you made a wise choice. I hope your DS is continuing to flourish.

Can someone give more specific examples of what pastoral care issues their DS faced?
My DS is in his first year there and want to make sure I am not missing anything. He seems very happy and he hasn't complained about anything. This is his first boarding experience so not sure what I should be expecting

I have changed my name and will send you a pm

My experience would be too identifying @questioningall .

I think that you will have to read between the lines @questioningall.My DS is safe and happy at this new school.

I have deleted my message now @questioningall , as you will understand I didn't want it left there any longer than necessary due to distressing nature of the events.

Leaving aside the fact that you know nothing about my DC or the impact of their school experiences, @Christmascardigan , I didn't compare my DC to your DS. I expressed empathy for your situation; if that is your idea of insensitive then so be it.

No, I don't think men like that change, and of course it is extremely concerning that he worked in multiple schools over a long career. However that still wasn't my question. You implied that Winchester continued to employ this man despite being aware of his history. I asked if you could clarify whether that was in fact what you were claiming, because that would be a damning indictment of the school. You seem reluctant to give that clarification.

Despite what you seem to think from the tone of your responses, I'm not trying to have a go at you. It can be really difficult to form an objective picture of a school and its suitability for one's own child from other parents' experiences (good or bad). Unsubstantiated hints that a school may have been complicit in covering up for a sex offender don't make that task any easier. I asked a question about comments you made - you have chosen not to answer that question, so I'll leave it there.